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Commitment Issues?

Even since I was little I had the urge to feel as much independent as possible. I have had relationships in the past and I love going out on dates. The thing is, after a few dates when things start to get serious and the guy asks me if I'd like a serious relationship I always end up rejecting them. So far I haven't regretted it because I figured it wouldn't work out either way but is there a chance that the idea of having to make room for a boyfriend in my life and open up to him scares me? I mean I am a feminist and I don't like depending on others, I have been told several times that guys end up feeling intimidated by me, is that a bad thing?

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It's all fun and games until you end up dying alone.
You're an 18 year old girl who doesn't want a serious relationship.

:congrats:
Think of it from the other side of having commitment issues.....

I want a settled down relationship but everyone I've met over the last 3 years (including my ex, which says it all -_-) didn't want it. Had FWB's and one night stands with a couple of people over the last year, who I actually liked and none turned out to wanting any level of commitment.

However when I finally have a FWB thing going on where I have accepted I'd be happy with that, she decides she actually wants commitment after 2 months... Just can't win....
Reply 4
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James222
3
Feminism ends at the bedroom door
Hate to see the word "feminism" being tossed around so cheaply that it loses its original meaning and/or purpose
Reply 6
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AnnaChrst97
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Original post by shawn_o1
Hate to see the word "feminism" being tossed around so cheaply that it loses its original meaning and/or purpose


The reason I "tossed it around so easily" as you so "kindly" said, is because being a feminist is a huge part of me and where I live most people and sadly most women don't even know what it means to be an active feminist who supports feminism simply because she demands equal rights worldwide. Plus, seeing as the reason I chose to study law and become a lawyer was greatly influenced by my burning passion to fight against any kind of inequality, thus inequality between the two sexes, I wouldn't say I choose to "toss this word so cheaply so that it loses its original meaning". The way I see it most people, especially guys, are intimidated simply by hearing this word.
Reply 7
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AnnaChrst97
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Original post by James222
Feminism ends at the bedroom door


I dare you to say this to a woman who actually knows what feminism means and see by yourself how well that will go. Chances are you will end up at the bedroom door from the outside, staring at it, because it will be closed and double locked.
Reply 8
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AnnaChrst97
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Original post by hollywoodbudgie
You're an 18 year old girl who doesn't want a serious relationship.

:congrats:


Wow, inserting a clapping emoji most likely to congratulate yourself for your oh so charming and enlightening opinion? Have to say now I'm a little scared. Who knows though, maybe
you're right, in that case here you go {\rtf1\ansi\ansicpg1252{\fonttbl}{\colortbl;\red255\green255\blue255;}}
Reply 9
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AnnaChrst97
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Original post by hollywoodbudgie
You're an 18 year old girl who doesn't want a serious relationship.

:congrats:


Wow, inserting a clapping emoji most likely to congratulate yourself for your oh so charming and enlightening opinion? Have to say now I'm a little scared. Who knows though, maybe
you're right :smile:
I get the impression that you are a bit arrogant and self centred tbh.
I dunno it seems to me that you're the kind of girl who thinks no guy is ever good enough for her. :dontknow:

But I may be wrong for all I know.
Original post by AnnaChrst97
I dare you to say this to a woman who actually knows what feminism means and see by yourself how well that will go. Chances are you will end up at the bedroom door from the outside, staring at it, because it will be closed and double locked.

Feminism does end at the bedroom door for most women. A lot have submissive tendencies, a few even fantasise of being raped. That's not really compatible with feminism.

For me, feminism starts at the bedroom door. I get my jollies off from dominant women.
Original post by Ed's Balls
It's all fun and games until you end up dying alone.


I have to admit you do have a point here, no one wants to die alone. But then again it crosses my mind that hey, mother Teresa and Jean-Jacques Rousseau both died alone and they did quite alright, didn't they?
Original post by SiminaM
I get the impression that you are a bit arrogant and self centred tbh.
I dunno it seems to me that you're the kind of girl who thinks no guy is ever good enough for her. :dontknow:

But I may be wrong for all I know.


Have to admit in all my life I've never been told I'm arrogant or self centered, how on earth could you justify you thinking I'm arrogant? Honestly, if by not feeling comfortable enough to open up in a relationship and the thought of having a serious long term relationship seems suffocating to me at the moment is justified as me being self centered, then by all means, I guess I'm self centered! Wow thank you so much for your help I feel so relieved to know apparently all of my friends and family have been wrong all this time about me!
Reply 14
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slade p
4
It was going all fine until you said your a feminist.
Original post by DanB1991
Think of it from the other side of having commitment issues.....

I want a settled down relationship but everyone I've met over the last 3 years (including my ex, which says it all -_-) didn't want it. Had FWB's and one night stands with a couple of people over the last year, who I actually liked and none turned out to wanting any level of commitment.

However when I finally have a FWB thing going on where I have accepted I'd be happy with that, she decides she actually wants commitment after 2 months... Just can't win....


Hey think of it the other way around, better late than never! I mean the way I see it many girls don't seek out for a serious relationship and instead they think "wherever the wind takes us". I know it's a bit selfish because you feel like you don't know how it will turn out but some women and people in general find suffocating the idea of having to declare if a relationship is serious or not before they enter it!
Original post by AnnaChrst97
Have to admit in all my life I've never been told I'm arrogant or self centered, how on earth could you justify you thinking I'm arrogant? Honestly, if by not feeling comfortable enough to open up in a relationship and the thought of having a serious long term relationship seems suffocating to me at the moment is justified as me being self centered, then by all means, I guess I'm self centered! Wow thank you so much for your help I feel so relieved to know apparently all of my friends and family have been wrong all this time about me!

Are you trying to victimise yourself?
Original post by AnnaChrst97
I dare you to say this to a woman who actually knows what feminism means and see by yourself how well that will go. Chances are you will end up at the bedroom door from the outside, staring at it, because it will be closed and double locked.


Well most actual feminists are single for that very reason
Original post by SiminaM
Are you trying to victimise yourself?


Seriously that's how you took it?! From when does defending yourself because you feel you're being accused, because honestly that's how the way you replied to me on the first place made me feel, means I am "victimizing myself"? Anyway I did post the thread, you expressed your opinion and even though I don't agree with it I choose to respect it and respect you.
Reply 19
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Zechs
14
Original post by AnnaChrst97
Even since I was little I had the urge to feel as much independent as possible. I have had relationships in the past and I love going out on dates. The thing is, after a few dates when things start to get serious and the guy asks me if I'd like a serious relationship I always end up rejecting them. So far I haven't regretted it because I figured it wouldn't work out either way but is there a chance that the idea of having to make room for a boyfriend in my life and open up to him scares me? I mean I am a feminist and I don't like depending on others, I have been told several times that guys end up feeling intimidated by me, is that a bad thing?


It is bad for you really, you have take in all the indoctrination a some guys would not even want to date you. Really it's very hard to not view so called feminists as feminazis these days.

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