The Student Room Group

Is my mum an alcoholic?

She just came home from work half an hour ago and she's already had two full to brim glasses of white wine. She does this every night, and I wouldn't be surprised if she has another one or two before going to bed.

She also bought herself another bottle of white on the way back and she's almost finished the one from a couple days back too.

I never drink at home, ever. I only drink with my friends on a Saturday night.

Should I be worried? I told her "you're on your second one already?" And she didn't seem to care.

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Reply 1
She's got a habit.
sounds familiar :colondollar: I would say alcoholism is having an emotional dependence on alcohol. If you think she's addicted, then odds are she's an alcoholic.
Reply 3
Original post by N-R-G
She's got a habit.


So not a dependence then? Should I not be worried?
She clearly has something on her mind and just wants to forget about it. Maybe you having a drink with her and having a long talk would be good for both of you.
Reply 5
Original post by picklescamp
sounds familiar :colondollar: I would say alcoholism is having an emotional dependence on alcohol. If you think she's addicted, then odds are she's an alcoholic.


Could it maybe be Bordeline Alcoholism?
Original post by Anonymous
She just came home from work half an hour ago and she's already had two full to brim glasses of white wine. She does this every night, and I wouldn't be surprised if she has another one or two before going to bed.

She also bought herself another bottle of white on the way back and she's almost finished the one from a couple days back too.

I never drink at home, ever. I only drink with my friends on a Saturday night.

Should I be worried? I told her "you're on your second one already?" And she didn't seem to care.


Hi OP. Until recently (at least for now), I had an alcoholic father.

That does sound like rather a lot to me. If she is having a couple of glasses or more every day I think it is very reasonable to be concerned. You should figure out some way of bringing it up, but I recommend thinking a lot about how you are going to do it first: she will possibly be quite defensive, since people usually take a while to admit they have a problem.

Do you have a family member who you can ask for help? Perhaps an aunt or uncle, or grandparent, who might be able to back you up if asking her doesn't go to plan (i.e., she is upset)?
Reply 7
Original post by Anonymous
So not a dependence then? Should I not be worried?


Original post by Andrew657Thomas
She clearly has something on her mind and just wants to forget about it. Maybe you having a drink with her and having a long talk would be good for both of you.


I agree with Andrew the best thing you can do together is talk.
Reply 8
Original post by Andrew657Thomas
She clearly has something on her mind and just wants to forget about it. Maybe you having a drink with her and having a long talk would be good for both of you.


I know it's to do with my aunt who passed away in January, but the fact is she has been drinking like this for years.
Reply 9
Original post by Anonymous
Hi OP. Until recently (at least for now), I had an alcoholic father.

That does sound like rather a lot to me. If she is having a couple of glasses or more every day I think it is very reasonable to be concerned. You should figure out some way of bringing it up, but I recommend thinking a lot about how you are going to do it first: she will possibly be quite defensive, since people usually take a while to admit they have a problem.

Do you have a family member who you can ask for help? Perhaps an aunt or uncle, or grandparent, who might be able to back you up if asking her doesn't go to plan (i.e., she is upset)?


There's literally no one I can talk to about it other than her and yes, she'll get defensive.
Reply 10
Original post by Anonymous
Hi OP. Until recently (at least for now), I had an alcoholic father.

That does sound like rather a lot to me. If she is having a couple of glasses or more every day I think it is very reasonable to be concerned. You should figure out some way of bringing it up, but I recommend thinking a lot about how you are going to do it first: she will possibly be quite defensive, since people usually take a while to admit they have a problem.

Do you have a family member who you can ask for help? Perhaps an aunt or uncle, or grandparent, who might be able to back you up if asking her doesn't go to plan (i.e., she is upset)?


I don't think a couple of glasses really classes her as an alcoholic.
It's definitely not good and above what the BMA recommends, however, I don't think it's a warning sign for alcoholism.
Think about how many go to the pub after work, or have a few glasses of wine with their meal.
Reply 12
Original post by Anonymous
There's literally no one I can talk to about it other than her and yes, she'll get defensive.


So talk to her.
Original post by tehforum
It's definitely not good and above what the BMA recommends, however, I don't think it's a warning sign for alcoholism.
Think about how many go to the pub after work, or have a few glasses of wine with their meal.


Well I personally don't drink at home at all. I go out once every few weeks with my mates but that's about it.

I don't think drinking on an empty stomach like my mum does it a good idea.
Original post by N-R-G
I don't think a couple of glasses really classes her as an alcoholic.


Don't be silly, of course not. But the fact she does this every day to the point of being pissed is.
Original post by Anonymous
Well I personally don't drink at home at all. I go out once every few weeks with my mates but that's about it.

I don't think drinking on an empty stomach like my mum does it a good idea.


You don't, but many other people do.
Original post by Anonymous
She just came home from work half an hour ago and she's already had two full to brim glasses of white wine. She does this every night, and I wouldn't be surprised if she has another one or two before going to bed.

She also bought herself another bottle of white on the way back and she's almost finished the one from a couple days back too.

I never drink at home, ever. I only drink with my friends on a Saturday night.

Should I be worried? I told her "you're on your second one already?" And she didn't seem to care.

My dad definitely is an alcoholic, although he drinks far far more than what you described your mum as drinking, your mum still drinks a lot especially if this is on a regular basis. Typical signs that someone is an alcoholic include hiding alcohol, (I've seen my dad hiding whiskey in a separate cubbourd to where the alcohol in my house is normally kept) and being unable to admit that they drink quite a bit.
Whether or not you should be worried depends on what kind of drunk they are, my dad just gets increasingly depressed. (I guess it could be worse eh?)
You could perhaps try and see why your mum drinks, is it to relax or is it more serious (to drown out problems in their life.), if so you could try and find out the root of these problems and talk to her about it.
hope this helps :smile:
Original post by tehforum
You don't, but many other people do.


Well it's quite clearly an issue that we need to tackle.
Original post by N-R-G
I don't think a couple of glasses really classes her as an alcoholic.


Every night?
Reply 19
Well before trying to classify whether your mums alcoholism is actual or borderline you should first care about WHY is she drinking. Focus on the "real" problem which is what makes your mum drink. Did anything bad happen to her? Is she having some bad thoughts about the future? Take some time to talk with her and make sure she understands you're there to help her out.

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