The Student Room Group

Frustrated with being socially awkward

So, I'm a first year uni student and am in my 3rd week. I have always lacked self confidence, I'm socially awkward and I am no good at instigating or holding a conversation. I just wondered if anyone has any tips on how I could try and overcome this issue?

I have made a few friends at uni and I do my best to join in with conversations, but while they talk, I'm more concerned about what I should say or where I should interject rather than actually listening them. Inside I am dying to stand out, to be more confident when communicating and I envy those who can carry a conversation with ease.

Online I can talk, and talk. I feel like I have a lot to offer but for some reason I cannot express myself openly in social situations. I know this is all psychological but I have no idea how to overcome it.

Anyone else ever felt this way? It's so frustrating!
I feel like this too, although I'm not at university yet (going next year!). I'm hopeless in social situations, I can't start or maintain conversations, make eye contact etc. I much prefer emailing or texting people than speaking with them face-to-face. I'm afraid I don't have any tips to help you as I'm in the same position, but you're definitely not the only one who feels like this! :h:
the human race is doomed

Original post by Leviathan1741
I much prefer emailing or texting people than speaking with them face-to-face.
Sounds like me when I was your age, I was more severe though and could barely leave my room let alone think about holding a conversation. I had severe social anxiety and whilst I am loathe to label you, you might want to look into some of the solutions people use for mild social anxiety (such as reading about CBT techniques) for helping your thought process (sometimes giving something a name can help you find better solutions!). Also, I recommend this awesome website: http://www.succeedsocially.com/articlesconversation :smile:
Reply 4
I feel anxious when I get to uni and my legs go like jelly walking down the stairs. I think its about confidence. You need to find people that you are comfortable with. They aren't any better than you. I have self esteem issues bit hide it well. I used to be shy then at 18 came out my shell. I can be so confident socially in one setting then awkward with other people cos I have a guilt complex or something
Stop leaning on social media for anything.
Use the call feature of your cell phone more often.
Read newspapers everyday.
Connect with fellow pupils by initiating, "How are you? / How is it going?"

Everyone has a reasonable degree of social anxiety, more folks than not will be understanding.

Practice makes perfect. Start talking to anyone and everyone. If you screw up you learnt a lesson if you don't screw up, you are not exploring the social circles
yeee i got a dinosaur phone with unlimited calls and no apps or wifi. Much better than texting. I hate texting

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