Can men and women ever be JUST close friends?

I don't mean casual friends.. I mean talking regularly, having a lot in common, looking forward to seeing them etc..

I have been talking to a guy online to improve my Japanese and I really enjoy talking to him to the point where when we aren't talking.. I'm thinking about talking to him. It has only been a week since we met online and I do have an obsessive-in-short-bursts personality. However I've been feeling anxious and guilty around my bf. He knows everything about what we talk about and how I feel anxious etc. I think I feel guilty that I'm enjoying talking to someone more than him. I'm also feeling anxious that my online friend will start to fancy me and then I'll have to cut ties. Or worst case scenario, I'll fancy him back! Please help me stop driving myself crazy

Summary: either give me advice or just express your opinion to the title

As a lesbian I can confirm that as I am attracted solely to girls, I cannot ever be simply "close friends" with them.

As a lesbian I can confirm that as I am attracted solely to girls, I cannot ever be simply "close friends" with them.

Think its very difficult, as you will probably sexual feelings towards them. Though they may not seem your type, your likes/dislikes (of things, people, etc.) can shift. I would, just out of respect for your partner, talk to them as you would any other friend (rather than 'close friends'. The transparency you have with your partner is good though! It would be considered bad if he didn't know.

Yeah that's true. The funny thing is apart from the worlds smallest picture, I don't know what he looks like! And my display pic is of my dog Haha. Sometimes I think I'm just enjoying the attention (he replies very fast and stays up until 5am Japanese time talking to me, we talk for hours and hours [although my responses are not as attentive]) . I think I need to be more structured with how long we talk..
Thanks for your help, mulling it over helps a lot

Haha. Yeah, probably more of an attention thing. But I guess its peoples personalities that we tend to go for in online relationships, in contrast to the initial physical looks attraction phase in person. Seems harmless regarding the content, but personally if my partner did that I would be very worried and outright disagree just because of the amount of time and effort you're both investing into each other. Adding structure will probs work . No probs.
P.S. didn't mean to add a face into my prev message. Don't know how that got in there haha.

I'd be lying if I said I've never found myself attracted to any of my female friends, but I think as long as you don't try to act upon your attractions, it doesn't really matter.

It's possible. Many of my close friends are both males and we get along just fine

You can't fancy someone you speak to over the Internet, have never met, and don't know what they look like.

Christ, if you think you might your boyfriend mustn't be much of a catch.


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