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When I find out that a guy likes me, I stop talking to them.

Well I have never been in a proper relationship, I am still a virgin, but there have been guys who have shown interest in me before, really nice guys and I just find myself getting so uncomfortable that I stop talking to them, I sort of lose interest...why do I do this? I don't get it. I can be so into them in the beginning but when they show interest I freak out and stop being interested.


I am actually scared this will get worse as I get older and I will just end up alone.
Original post by Anonymous
Well I have never been in a proper relationship, I am still a virgin, but there have been guys who have shown interest in me before, really nice guys and I just find myself getting so uncomfortable that I stop talking to them, I sort of lose interest...why do I do this? I don't get it. I can be so into them in the beginning but when they show interest I freak out and stop being interested.


I am actually scared this will get worse as I get older and I will just end up alone.


Which one would you choose? Losing interest when a guy shows interest or end up being alone? I guess the former as it cannot be neither because they contradict each other.
Reply 2
Original post by Anonymous
Which one would you choose? Losing interest when a guy shows interest or end up being alone? I guess the former as it cannot be neither because they contradict each other.


I can't help the former, it just happens. I think there is something wrong with me...:frown:
Original post by Anonymous
I can't help the former, it just happens. I think there is something wrong with me...:frown:


Are you socially an active person?
I wonder what your username is...

In any case, you should try to make an effort to try it out, or simply break it to them that you're not interested.

It's a mean thing to do, just saying.
You may have to just swallow that feeling and go for it, otherwise you will freak out any time a guy fancies you and you're right, you may end up alone.
I relate. Men can be shady so it's risky to let them in. Figure out why you freak out and answer perhaps lies there.
Reply 7
Original post by Anonymous
Are you socially an active person?


Not very. Could that have something to do with it?

I have always been quite introverted. :frown:
Reply 8
Original post by Ser Alex Toyne
I wonder what your username is...

In any case, you should try to make an effort to try it out, or simply break it to them that you're not interested.

It's a mean thing to do, just saying.


I don't mean to be mean. I just get scared I suppose, I know it's horrible though like the last guy I spoke to, I just blocked him off all social media. but to be honest he was saying all this stuff that made me uncomfortable, but I did over react.
Original post by Anonymous
Not very. Could that have something to do with it?

I have always been quite introverted. :frown:


It definitely can affect it, yes. Maybe try engaging more in conversations and going out with friends I guess. That might also help you be comfortable taking to a guy showing interest
Original post by Anonymous
Well I have never been in a proper relationship, I am still a virgin, but there have been guys who have shown interest in me before, really nice guys and I just find myself getting so uncomfortable that I stop talking to them, I sort of lose interest...why do I do this? I don't get it. I can be so into them in the beginning but when they show interest I freak out and stop being interested.


I am actually scared this will get worse as I get older and I will just end up alone.


You sound like you have trust issues in others. Or you are are very anxious about emotional commitment. Or both. I'm not entirely sure how to solve that because I've never had that problem but at least with that knowledge you can ask others who may do or research it yourself or look a little inside yourself to try and figure it out? Good luck :smile:
Reply 11
Original post by Anonymous
I can't help the former, it just happens. I think there is something wrong with me...:frown:


How old are you? Also do you think it has something to do without any childhood negative relationships/experiences you have had?
Original post by Mancini
How old are you? Also do you think it has something to do without any childhood negative relationships/experiences you have had?


Well I grew up in a really conservative family so I was told not to interact with boys, and well my parents relationship was never that great. Now that I'm older and guys show some interest it really does scare me, I don't know why, I can't explain it, I get anxious. Sometimes even a bit guilty if that makes any sense at all...
Reply 13
Original post by Anonymous
Well I grew up in a really conservative family so I was told not to interact with boys, and well my parents relationship was never that great. Now that I'm older and guys show some interest it really does scare me, I don't know why, I can't explain it, I get anxious. Sometimes even a bit guilty if that makes any sense at all...


Sounds like you have a fear of the Unknown , you are not sure how to socially interact with guys and so fear overtakes you probably to avoid some sort of embarrassment. I would say if you have any male friends try improve your socialising and flirting skills with them in order to overcome these feelings and behaviour.

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