I rejected a girl because she's fat. AMA

If you don't find her attractive, keep it to yourself. It just angers me when people like you label others as "barrels", whilst thinking that they are on some form of superior level. I'd reject the eye candy with a present criminal record of murder. Not attractive.

She came onto me at Uni today. It was after our seminar, she came up to me and asked me out.

I told her that she's so nice, but I'm dati

It's because she's really fat. It was embarrassing.


Was this bad?

If she implied that her aim was to have a romantic time together, which the words "ask me out" suggest, then yes, he could do whatever he wishes. One isn't forced to do anything just because it is kind to do. You do it if you have a desire to. It's a phenomenon we call "free will".

That's a different story. I have no problem with people who are overweight or underweight or normal weight but HEALTHY! But the morbidly obese who cannot stop stuffing their faces for NO reason at ALL are not attractive. Like they cannot even take care of and respect themselves and their bodies.

Then they go and cry because they're fat, and instead of changing it, they just eat more and get even fatter. That should be a crime!

are you really gonna tell me this turns you on?:

i didn't say i thought myself as superior, where did i mention that? they're humans too, just not ones i wanna mate with... can i not decide who i find attractive?

Why is it that people who find her attractive can give their opinions, but people who don't have to keep quiet?

I'm sorry but people can't just go around doing whatever they want and expect everyone to love them for it. They'll never know when to stop if no one says anything.

Now what they did is another story. They could be leonardo dicaprio but if they have criminal records and treat me like ****, i'll pass thank you very much. I was solely speaking of physical appearance. I'd also reject a morbidly obese person who has been an angel all their life with not so much as a parking ticket because i simply CANNOT be with someone i do not find attractive. .

well sometimes you have to be a gentlemen but i guess you dont know what that is.

well sometimes you have to be a gentlemen but i guess you dont know what that is.

well sometimes you have to be a gentlemen but i guess you dont know what that is.

She came onto me at Uni today. It was after our seminar, she came up to me and asked me out.

I told her that she's so nice, but I'm dating someone already (lie).

It's because she's really fat. It was embarrassing.


Was this bad?

You will have to understand that dieting and exercising regularly is a very difficult lifestyle choice for many. No one would want to be obese, yet with so many temptations to eat unhealthy food, with a Mcdonald at every corner of the square, and a KFC advert every time we switch the telly on, it becomes increasingly difficult. To the extent where eating a salad instead of burger leads to mental health issues. It is difficult. If they had a capability to be attractive thin and blonde, they would.

Out of all things to call a crime!

No it doesn't. But I'm not going to say that if I met her. If I did, it'd probably be rude thing for me to do.

Calling people barrels just seems really condescending

Because people have manners.

Leave them to it. Some clearly love it.

Being a gentleman isn't about lying to someone or settling for a relationship you don't want.
Being a gentleman is about refusing the offer in a polite and friendly manner, to spare the person's feelings.

Being up front and saying she is too fat for him would only be impolite if it isn't true.
Don't like hearing the word fat? Stop being fat. There's simply no excuse in this day and age unless it is due to an unavoidable health problem.

It may be difficult but it's possible. If someone really wanted to be healthy and lose weight they can. I'm sure someone could fit 30 minutes of exercise into a 24 hour day. It could be going for a jog in the morning, or cycling to work/ school, or doing extra curriculars, going swimming once a week, going to the gym twice a week, jump roping for goodness sake!... it's really not that hard.

As for the food, they can limit the fast food and KFC to one day a week so their cravings are fulfilled, but eat healthy the rest of the week. Losing weight/ being healthy is not a chore, it is possible. She could even just cut down on 300 calories below her BMR and lose weight. It's not rocket science.

and who said to be attractive you have to be stick thin and BLONDE?! It's not about your hair colour, or eye colour, or anything like that. It's about your confidence and your respect for your body.

Yes! It should be a crime to destroy yourself like that.

Isn't suicide a crime? I don't see the difference between eating yourself to death and putting a bullet through your brain other than the method used.

Obviously you wouldn't be rude about it, but maybe you could offer some help. Most unhealthy overweight people are insecure about their weight and WANT it to change. For example I was around 15 kg overweight, but having people making fun of me for it, mentioning it every time they saw me really made me want to lose weight. And I did, now i feel more confident in my own body and the teasing has stopped. People now admire me for making that change. You get tired of being fat, so you lose weight... simple as. I'm not saying go bully her, but i'm saying maybe if they were friends they could go hiking, swimming together, or some other kinda activity like walking to work/ school from the station together everyday instead of taking the bus.

I was using that to make a point. Exaggeration. Obviously I'm not gonna go up to a fat person and call them a barrel.
but tbh i don't see a difference
https://www.google.co.uk/search?q=barrel&es_sm=122&tbm=isch&imgil=_AeJc_bZ1PpWVM%253A%253BYSClS2ly8she0M%253Bhttp%25253A%25252F%25252Fxtcr.net%25252Ftopic%25252F26535-barrel%25252F&source=iu&pf=m&fir=_AeJc_bZ1PpWVM%253A%252CYSClS2ly8she0M%252C_&biw=1366&bih=643&usg=__y-0yCajEh4a2ZNvH7dK9R3VfAss%3D&ved=0CDkQyjdqFQoTCIq1rcr1t8gCFUlvFAod21cINw&ei=XAYZVoqXCMneUduvobgD#imgrc=_AeJc_bZ1PpWVM%3A&usg=__y-0yCajEh4a2ZNvH7dK9R3VfAss%3D


do you?

You can disagree about something without being rude. It is not rude to point out you do not like something. If I say "Hey [insert name here] you wanna go to the gym together? I'm trying to lose 10kg before my next birthday, wanna join me?" I'm sure the person isn't gonna think i was rude. They might appreciate it as it would be easier to lose weight with a friend to keep you on track than by yourself.That's worse than calling them names for it tbh.

Being obese has MANY, and i mean MANY health problems that come with it. They could end up killing themselves. Or living a life of pain... and maybe die before they're even 50! It is selfish to not tell them, and watch them kill themselves because you don't wanna come across as rude. I'd rather be told that I need to stop, and how to stop, than just be watched by judging eyes while my body slowly breaks down.

I never mentioned that losing weight is impossible, but it is difficult, especially for those with no support system in place, where their only source of enjoyment in life is eating. It might sound sad, but some people depend on food to mentally sustain themselves. It is hard. And at times people will need professional involvement to ensure that they stick to the plan.

Overeating is an addiction. Tell a smoker to stop smoking. Not everyone perseveres.

It was a figure of speech. Thin blondes are associated with perfect beauty. (but are not in reality).

Then it is a crime to smoke excessively, drink excessive alcohol. It should be a crime to go to Mcdonalds too often. I would call it the Law of overeating Section 21A, it should be passed in parliament. Take all smokers to prison. They are criminals.

It's just ridiculous.

No it isn't a crime. True, they both need help. And it is not easy.

I haven't disagreed with any of the above. My point is, that for some, losing weight is as hard as giving up smoking. Others also get tired of being called fat, of being bullied, but not all have the ability and endurance to change their diet. These people will need help, and calling them barrels isn't going the help the matter I'm afraid.

Yes I do. One is a human, the other a barrel.

Not wanting to go to the gym and insulting someone based on their weight is not the same thing. Calling someone fat/barrel/other is rude.

Do tell them, in a professional/ kind setting, where they are not being judged for what they are. Whether this be in terms of personality or looks.