Should I quit university?

I am a second year student at cambridge taking a year out of study. I applied to Cambridge thinking it would bring me eternal happiness and give me solutions to everything in life. I was wrong. Now I have found a new lifestyle that makes me the happiest I have ever been - abroad. I now have everything I've ever wanted and always missed out on in life. I want to stay here and I don't want to go back to England or finish my studies particularly, am perfectly happy here.


But, it's Cambridge. A once in a lifetime chance. I don't know if I should force myself back and to finish another 2 years just for the fact that it's a high status, a high achievement. I don't really care about it that much but because it's Cambridge I think: Maybe I SHOULD do it for that reason. Should I think about what I should do or just do what makes me happy?


My heart wants me to stay here abroad and honestly I don't know what my head wants.


If you were in this situation, what would you do?

I am a second year student at cambridge taking a year out of study. I applied to Cambridge thinking it would bring me eternal happiness and give me solutions to everything in life. I was wrong. Now I have found a new lifestyle that makes me the happiest I have ever been - abroad. I now have everything I've ever wanted and always missed out on in life. I want to stay here and I don't want to go back to England or finish my studies particularly, am perfectly happy here.


But, it's Cambridge. A once in a lifetime chance.

I am a second year student at cambridge taking a year out of study. I applied to Cambridge thinking it would bring me eternal happiness and give me solutions to everything in life. I was wrong. Now I have found a new lifestyle that makes me the happiest I have ever been - abroad. I now have everything I've ever wanted and always missed out on in life. I want to stay here and I don't want to go back to England or finish my studies particularly, am perfectly happy here.


But, it's Cambridge. A once in a lifetime chance. I don't know if I should force myself back and to finish another 2 years just for the fact that it's a high status, a high achievement. I don't really care about it that much but because it's Cambridge I think: Maybe I SHOULD do it for that reason. Should I think about what I should do or just do what makes me happy?


My heart wants me to stay here abroad and honestly I don't know what my head wants.


If you were in this situation, what would you do?

This is a parent speaking. My advice is to think of our future and go back to finish. The life you like abroad will still be there, but if you finish your degree you will have better opportunities, i.e. the chance to find meaningful work at a far better rate of pay. It is not just a prestigious piece of paper - with a Cam degree you get a network and a qualification of work habits and expertise (implied or otherwise). Look at it like a long-term investment.

The exception would be if you hate Cam and feel it is truly not for you, that you made a fundamental mistake in your choice of course, etc. It sounds like it just didn't meet your expectations, which may have been inflated. Also, you may feel differently once you're back, with new perspective.

Its pretty difficult to know without understanding what you are doing now and what aspects of Cambridge/University you expected to bring joy that didn't.

The first question is whether what you are doing now is sustainable and will bring long term pleasure.
If you are doing typical gap year type low wage jobs in the tourist industry then you may find eventually the lifestyle pales when you realise you can never earn enough to live where you want to, perhaps buy a house or support a family. A job with no intellectual challenge may be a welcome respite from A levels but eventually the lack of responsibility and answering to a boss you feel is less competent than you are can become a drag.
If on the other hand you have found a career which uses your talents and where a degree adds little value which could be anything from running your own business to an artistic or IT field then it may well be a wise choice.

The second would be why did you think Cambridge (or anything) would bring "eternal happiness". Was it that you would please your school or parents to have achieved the offer. Was it that you thought you wanted a highly competitive career but didn't expect it to be such hard work. Or was it that you loved your subject and really wanted to continue to study for three years but decided that was no longer true?

Either way sometimes it is best to go away, live a bit, grow up a bit and sometimes re-enter the world of study when you have a clear ambition and need. As others have said you can always reapply as a mature student and if Cambridge were prepared to take you first time, I'm sure you will get into a perfectly respectably university second time.

Having heard mostly the full story now, what would you both say to this?

What I am doing now is living with my family abroad. A new family. I don't want to reveal too much of my personal life, but basically back in England I am family-less and have spent the past 12 years alone. I entered Cambridge thinking it would bring me a brand new life with great opportunities in the future, thinking this is what would make me happy. I have learned that a high paid job isn't what I want. I don't care what job I work and I don't have any desires or aspirations. What I really want is to be happy, surrounded by my family and friends, living a simple happy life. I was searching for something I had never had, thinking that somehow a life of prestige would be the answer, and now having lived both lives I realise it isn't. In that sense cambridge no longer fufils the role I gave to it when I was studying A level to get in.

Stay where you are if you like it and see if you still like it a year od two down the line. If not you can always go back to Cambridge or another uni or do whatever else you want. You can always go back to education if things dont work out. However just out of curiosity, what kind of job do you imagine yourself doing in a tiny village for the rest of your life? Not to sound patronizing or anything but unless you have connections or a family business that you can work in or something, giving up Cambridge to work in retail or something would be silly even if you dont want a high flying career.

Having heard mostly the full story now, what would you both say to this?

What were you reading at Cambridge?

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You need money to continue to go on holidays abroad. You need a job to get money. So I recommend you go back to school and finish the degree. Blunt, but you know it makes sense.

Best wishes