I hate myself so much. Everything that is wrong in my life is my own fault and I hate it a lot. I wish I could just huddle up into a corner and disappear. I've never hated anyone more than I've hated myself. And its my own fault. I chose to think this way and be in this mindset of self loathing.
But the things you can change, change them so that you feel happier.
I wish I could but I can't. I feel like I'm trapped in an endless cycle that I cant remove myself from. I cant seem to change my habits or my mindset even though it makes me so unhappy. So in essence my unhappiness is due to me.
You're included in the 'no-one'. I don't think anyone should hate himself or herself.
You don't have to blame anyone else. You don't have to blame yourself. Hating yourself is not taking responsibility; doing something about it is.
and not being able to do something about it and letting things continue how they are warrants the fault as mines. Therefore again me blaming myself is unfortunately justifiable.
But the things you can change, change them so that you feel happier.
It's not that simple. Imagine you're in Tesco and every item in the store falls off the shelves and you have to put them all back. That overwhelming feeling is what this feels like, where do you start? Who even knows if you'll put all the items back. Is there any point in even trying?
and not being able to do something about it and letting things continue how they are warrants the fault as mines. Therefore again me blaming myself is unfortunately justifiable.
It may or may not be justifiable, but not reasonable or logical.
If you cannot do anything about it: [video="youtube;SvOyi6mYIWs"]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SvOyi6mYIWs[/video]
It's not that simple. Imagine you're in Tesco and every item in the store falls off the shelves and you have to put them all back. That overwhelming feeling is what this feels like, where do you start? Who even knows if you'll put all the items back. Is there any point in even trying?
thank u so much for understanding this is exactly it!
I wish I could but I can't. I feel like I'm trapped in an endless cycle that I cant remove myself from. I cant seem to change my habits or my mindset even though it makes me so unhappy. So in essence my unhappiness is due to me.
I'm sorry to hear that. Without knowing what it is, for me it's hard to say, but maybe one day you will be able to do something about it.
It's not that simple. Imagine you're in Tesco and every item in the store falls off the shelves and you have to put them all back. That overwhelming feeling is what this feels like, where do you start? Who even knows if you'll put all the items back. Is there any point in even trying?
You could sit there hating yourself for it or try to do something about it. Start where it makes sense to start. If you aren't able to put everything back, fair enough. You've tried and you've put some back and maybe, just maybe, that's good enough. Get a good friend or relative to help you put things back and it may feel easier.
I've spent the last 2 days completely drunk out of my mind to get away from this feeling. I've never touched more than a drop of alcohol before so it's been interesting to say the least. My fiance called me after I reached my peak of ****ing myself up completely and I cried to him saying I can't deal with any of my **** anymore. At some point I told him that he's perfect and now I'm crying because I'm just really glad I said that. I have no idea why I'm crying. I think I'm still drunk. I hate what I've turned into. My life has just been one falling domino after another. It's about time I started drinking. God I need a drink.
You could sit there hating yourself for it or try to do something about it. Start where it makes sense to start. If you aren't able to put everything back, fair enough. You've tried and you've put some back and maybe, just maybe, that's good enough. Get a good friend or relative to help you put things back and it may feel easier.
I understand what you're saying, logically you're reasoning is sound. But the problem is that overwhelming feeling, even if you realise what you need to do, doing it is extremely difficult because you don't think rationally.
I understand what you're saying, logically you're reasoning is sound. But the problem is that overwhelming feeling, even if you realise what you need to do, doing it is extremely difficult because you don't think rationally.