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Grievance against lecturer

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So we can all agree you are not all vulnerable in this situation, then. Your reactions on this thread are way over the top.

According to you.

Reply 41

Yellow 03

Original post by apronedsamurai

According to you.

Yes, along with another half a dozen people on this thread.

Reply 42

User947387

Original post by Yellow 03

Yes, along with another half a dozen people on this thread.

Would that be the person who called me a dickhead, the person who compared me to a mass murderer; or the one who called me a liar and delightful?

And there are just as many people who have agreed with me, and have been SUPPORTIVE.

Reply 43

limetang

Are you like this to people in real life? Yes your lecturer ballsed up. It's not good but it happens, it may very well be the case that either he was unaware of your health issues (though he should have been given the position he's in) or that he simply doesn't understand the condition and doesn't understand that it may make things that he'd view as common courtesy impossible. This isn't to condone the way he acted, but it's definitely true that the solution is not to act like a petulant child over all this. If this is how you treat the people around you it wouldn't shock me at all if they have a problem with you.

Honestly it sounds like neither of you are acting appropriately or professionally here.

(edited 8 years ago)

Grow up?

Original post by apronedsamurai

I've read through the thread and (I may have missed it but) I haven't seen anybody call you any of those things.

Reply 46

User947387

Original post by limetang

I've read through the thread and (I may have missed it but) I haven't seen anybody call you any of those things.

Yes, they ARE there.
The crazy remark has subsequently been removed after I reported it.
As has the comparison to myself, to Eric Harris, a murderer who murdered his classmates.

#28 "Honestly you're giving honest disabled people a bad name by having a hissy fit over this." (Questioning my ethics, and seems to question the validity of my disability).
#33, (sounds like a dickhead)

Reply 47

limetang

Original post by apronedsamurai

I'll concede for the first two as I never saw them and I'll take your word for it that they're there.

#28 Does not appear to be calling you a liar though, you're reading something into it that I at least didn't.

#33 I thought was in reference to your teacher not you ... at best it's ambiguous.

Reply 48

gundog48

Have you told him to go **** himself? Because I'd tell him to go **** himself.

Reply 49

Reord

OP have you heard the term "locus of control"? It might help you to understand some of the feelings you're having and some of the reactions you're getting from the other posters on here.

Reply 50

pineneedles

I think the best thing you can do with this is to learn from it and try not to feel upset about it anymore. Suffering with anxiety issues and other health problems myself I'm starting to realise how much I've been mollycoddled over the recent years, simply because people feel obliged to accept and accommodate for my anxieties and health problems. I'm not saying there's anything wrong with this, if it's needed people should be allowed equal opportunity and understanding when they're struggling, but it's give and take. You do need to take action yourself to explain your absences, though I can appreciate that if it hasn't been expected of you to do this in the past, you may assume that your lecturer knows about you and your problems, and so would automatically know what's going on, when it isn't necessarily the case.
In my opinion, it's simply a case of, if you want and expect people to make allowances for you on the basis of these problems, you must reciprocate and give them as much respect back.

Reply 51

User947387

Original post by Reord

OP have you heard the term "locus of control"? It might help you to understand some of the feelings you're having and some of the reactions you're getting from the other posters on here.

I have not, no.

Reply 52

User947387

Original post by pineneedles

I totally agree with you.

But what got my back up was the very aggressive and downright nasty way this sentiment was expressed. People here were more interested in playing a blame game; and being combatative about stating it. Accusing me of dishonesty, calling me crazy etc; uncalled for, unnecessary and downright unpleasant. Saying that I give "Honest disabled people a bad name" was especially vile.

I eagerly await the next time such grandstanding, paradigms of morality even slip a quarter of an inch from their own sanctimonious self-righteosuness. Because I WILL be there, to cut them down and with glee.

Reply 53

User947387

Original post by pineneedles

Having already advised my head of department previously about my health, and in the specific context of how it affects my attendance; having already completed the necessary peice of work (the only issue with it was I needed to fix a graph and sign my name); and having already been told by my head of dept who is my lecturers BOSS that it was not a big deal, easily fixed and there was no deadline associated or involved with the situation.

I do not like using my health as an out. I have actually posted the full extent of my health problems here but they have been deleted/edited because they fall under a certain forbidden topic for the site rules (which tbh, and in fairness to the mods I DONT resent btw).

I was angry when I first posted. Furious. My blood was hot, and I was very upset.

But I repeat: the militantly aggressive, confrontational and harrassassing responses I have RECIEVED HERE have left me badly shaken at how nasty people are, and put me on the defensive; that I am forced to explain and defend myself.

End result? I am handing in the piece of work. I havent failed. I had never failed at all. My head of dept was very surprised I was told that, because it was HIM, the head of dept who sets the academic policy, and makes decisions, and has the final power of veto. And as far as he was concerned? Nope, I am a capable, hard working, courteous student, who has now gotten incensed by a bad situation.

As a sign of good faith, I have handed in 3 pieces of coursework in, a month early.

I CAN DO the work. I WILL DO the work. I DO BELIEVE IN compromise.

But I will treat people precisely as they treat me. Be that in RL, or on here. Be my friend, and you will have a stalwart ally. Become my enemy, and I will crush you.