Career vs relationship

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Original post by MrsSheldonCooper

You can have a perfect career tbh. Not sure about a relationship.

you dont need to be 'sure', it's a thought experiment positing certain accepted axioms to see what logical conclusion you come to.

you can't take part in the thought experiment if you refuse to accept (even for the purposes of this thread) the axioms the thought experiment relies upon.

Reply 81

Andy98

Relationship - no point having money if you've got no one to spend it with

Reply 82

MrsSheldonCooper

Original post by The Arsonist

So what you're really saying is you'd rather your happiness depend on a career because you're afraid of committing to something that may end up breaking your heart?

The thing with your reasoning is that: "Realistically, theres no such thing as a perfect career. And, anyway, if I had a perfect relationship that I loved, I wouldn't feel the need to have a career," probably works too, especially if perfect partner is loaded.

Relationship with dog is still a relationship.

Scared of heartbreak? Maybe yes. No idea why but I'm a career person nowadays.

I'm not going to be in a romantic relationship with a dog though.

Reply 83

troubadour.

Original post by walking in sand

Thought experiments don't need to be 'relevant in practice'.You just display intellectual immaturity by refusing to accept the terms of the thought experiment when you disagree with its 'relevance'.

What's the point of the experiment if it has to relevance to the actual possibilities? We might as well have a thought experiment about self-preservation strategies in a zombie apocalypse -- that would be as useful as this one.

Besides, I've already participated in the experiment on earlier pages (career over relationship, but would ideally like both), so it's not like I'm dodging the question... :erm:

Original post by The Arsonist

This makes me sad. Do you hate video games and ice cream too?

No. I don't see why not being an idealist when it comes to relationships would imply that about me.

Reply 84

The Arsonist

Original post by Hydeman

No. I don't see why not being an idealist when it comes to relationships would imply that about me.

Thought experiments aren't necessary based in reality but they tell us something about ourselves. Your disliked the idea of this experiment because it asked you to abstract away from what's realistic for a moment and you responded with ' I don't see the point'. This is relevant to both video games (in the same sense) and ice cream (in the 'how could you not like ice-cream?' sense).

Reply 85

The Arsonist

Original post by MrsSheldonCooper

Scared of heartbreak? Maybe yes. No idea why but I'm a career person nowadays.

I'm not going to be in a romantic relationship with a dog though.

Probably because you'd like your achievement to be independent of other people. I imagine you'd probably prefer people admire than love you too.

Reply 86

troubadour.

Original post by The Arsonist

Ah, I see. Anyway, I've already responded to the thought experiment on page 2:

Original post by Hydeman

Dream career.

Original post by walking in sand

You're doing life wrong.

Original post by Hydeman

I'm just answering the question. :beard:

Ideally, I'd like both. But if it's a choice between the two, dream career all the way. :woo:

Now I'm just saying that it's a pointless experiment. :u:

Reply 87

The Arsonist

Original post by Hydeman

Ah, I see. Anyway, I've already responded to the thought experiment on page 2:

Now I'm just saying that it's a pointless experiment. :u:

Touché; Hadn't looked at the answers.

Reply 88

username738914

Original post by ivy.98

Career. As harsh as it sounds, but people are exchangeable, your future isn't

You knoooooww

Posted from TSR Mobile

Reply 89

walking in sand

Original post by Hydeman

What's the point of the experiment if it has to relevance to the actual possibilities?
Thought experiments don't need a 'point'. Why does anything need a 'point'?

Next you'll be telling me there must be a God because otherwise life would have no 'point'.

Original post by Hydeman

I've already responded to the thought experiment on page 2:
How did you rationalise it?

Reply 90

The Arsonist

Original post by ivy.98

Career. As harsh as it sounds, but people are exchangeable, your future isn't

Most people are. The perfect relationship, though?

The point of this exercise, I think, is to see whether where you sense your sense of fulfilment being derived is from achievement (professional or otherwise) or friendship/family/connection.

In reality, I'm with you; There are enough people on the planet. On the other hand, those extremely close people that you actually like are not in abundance . And if they are the logistics of finding replacements would be a nightmare in nigh impossible.

So the question is if you could have either which would it be? Isolated and alone, with interchangeable people, with your career and big house, or a true and perfect love?

(edited 8 years ago)

Reply 91

troubadour.

Original post by walking in sand

Thought experiments don't need a 'point'. Why does anything need a 'point'?

Next you'll be telling me there must be a God because otherwise life would have no 'point'.

It doesn't need a point, but it's pretty useless for anything other than providing a chat opportunity on a student website. I've already answered the question. The point I'm trying to make is that I'm not sure quite why it means so much to you that I should answer one way or the other. xD

How did you rationalise it?

Well, I said this:

Original post by Hydeman

I'm just answering the question. :beard:

Ideally, I'd like both. But if it's a choice between the two, dream career all the way. :woo:

I just think that the dream career would be better than the perfect relationship for a reserved person like me. :3

Reply 92

walking in sand

Original post by The Arsonist

So the question is if you could have either which would it be? Isolated and alone, with interchangeable people, with your career and big house, or a true and perfect love?

i think all the recluses tend to avoid this dichotomy because they dont like the answer

Reply 93

walking in sand

Original post by Hydeman

It doesn't need a point, but it's pretty useless for anything other than providing a chat opportunity on a student website.

...

I just think that the dream career would be better than the perfect relationship for a reserved person like me. :3

That's not much of a rationalisation. You're not saying why (your 'perfect' relationship would account for your 'reserved' nature).

Reply 94

troubadour.

Original post by walking in sand

That's not much of a rationalisation. You're not saying why (your 'perfect' relationship would account for your 'reserved' nature).

Well, that renders the question essentially unanswerable. Whatever fault I can find in either of them is immediately removed from the equation because of the stipulations of the experiment. This goes in both directions: a dream career would essentially account for anything that I'd be missing out on by not choosing a perfect relationship.

Reply 95

The Arsonist

Original post by walking in sand

i think all the recluses tend to avoid this dichotomy because they dont like the answer

Even though I answered perfect relationship, career makes more sense, since this is something I can work towards being perfect with some degree of confidence, given the amount of control I have over it. People are fickle.

Reply 96

stargirl63

I'd say career.

In looking at this question. I can still have an okay relationship. There's plenty of people out there , single, with children, divorced etc...and very happy. It's not like you can't be happy if you're single. So I'd pick career.

Reply 97

ValeriaMGD

I'm looking forward to have both now. I love my boyfriend and both have huge aspirations and objectives as individuals and as a couple.

Two years ago I would have said perfect career, I didn't wanted to be with someone because I thought it might hold me back, but now I feel in love and have everything I could dream of in a partner, and wouldn't exchange that for anything :smile:

However, I don't think it's healthy to give up you personal aspirations and stay at home to take care of the children instead (unless that is your dream in life, of course)

I hope to have both but I'd rather have love and doing what I like (not perfect career, but not loathe what I do either) than earning lots of money and not having someone to hug at home.

Reply 98

AmyH81

When I was studying for my PGCE 2/3 years ago - I had very clear ideas of working as a Teacher here for a year and then moving to Australia to teach. However, I met my now Husband whilst I was doing the course and we ended up moving in together, having a Son and then getting Married. For many reasons, we can't move to Australia but I haven't been able to get a job Teaching anyway so I am now heading in a different Career direction and applying for Children's Nursing (which I have an interview for next week). My Husband is incredibly supportive and although he works shifts, we will work it out (Childcare etc) if I get a place. Getting Married and having our Son has been the most amazing thing I have ever experienced. My Husband absolutely dotes on Alex as well. So I would say you can have both but if I had to choose, it would be a relationship :-) x