I'M CONFUSED.
I've never had a crush on anyone (apart from once in Primary School which doesn't count) due to being in a girls Secondary School and Sixth Form.
I made my first male friend in uni from October 2015. We became really close quickly, we used to talk from 11pm-5am. I found out he was interested when he made it obvious that he would confess soon (I acted dumb and he bought it).
I panicked because I thought I didn't like him since his personality and appearance didn't tick the boxes of my usual type. So I tried putting him off by talking about my hygiene issues & dropped hints I wasn't interested.
- I ALWAYS think and talk about him.
- I get jealous when he's texting other girls who I haven't confirmed are his platonic friends.
- Texting him was the best part of the day.
- He found out my friends cousins showed interest in me. So he tried pursuing another girl and kept telling me the details with her. I was fuming & felt annoyed at the girl, but pretended to be happy for him.
- I got annoyed when he didn't reply in time/often as usual.
- We had a fight last week because he wasn't sharing his problem. He then drunk texted me confessing his feelings & ranting how I didn't feel the same and we should end being friends.
- I was in denial that we stopped being friends till I saw him in uni. He seemed cold & was avoiding me. I felt a stab in my heart, that day I was crying before I fell asleep.
- He lost faith in serious relationships after being cheated on, so he had serial relationships before. He made it obvious he wants something serious this time round.
- After rejecting him, he started binge drinking again (he used to in the past). After realising this, I thought I could maybe be with him to stop hurting his feelings.