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Struggling to find happiness?

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Why bother with a post grad? Are they even worth it? Have your say! 26-10-2016
    • Thread Starter

    I've been depressed for a few years but received barely any help since I was diagnosed two years ago. I went to a different doctors because I had been feeling really bad lately and I've been put on medication and have more help in university and so forth. However, it's the first proper time I've had it really bad to the point of feeling empty and bored all the time. There's nothing that really incites my interest for too long and it's just getting me agitated with everyone around me.

    I don't have many friends and the ones I do have seem content with just laying around doing nothing or just staying in and watching tv whereas I'd like to go out and do something; not drink or anything, just out.
    It's making me sad because all I spend my time doing is thinking negative thoughts and getting lower in mood.
    I've recently messed things up with a guy I liked and so am in a delicate place as it is. I really don't know what to do to pick myself up and be a bit happier.
    I'm supposed to be studying for my exams but I can't muster up the energy or motivation to do it.

    Does anyone have any suggestions or advice please?


    Perhaps you could ask your doctor for some talking therapy to treat your depression alongside your medication? A combination of medication and therapy is usually the best way to (a) treat depression and (b) prevent it returning in future. Ask your docor if they will arrange some cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT) for you, you may have to wait for this, but it will be worth it. In the meantime you could try self-administering therapy by reading books about CBT, I particularly recommend anything by Albert Ellis.

    You remind me a little of me when I was at Uni, but it's only now that I'm a few years older I realise just how many opportunties I had at Uni to make new friends but wasted. As you get older, in general there are fewer opportunities to meet new people and try new things. As hard as it can be when you're feeling down, make an effort to get out there, join clubs and societies and meet new people. Think about the things that interest you (sport?, current affairs?, music?) and join a society to match. You're only young once and you're only at Uni once. That's not to say you have to ditch your existing friends, but try and supplement these friendships with some new ones too. Take some risks and ask yourself - what's the worst that could happen?

    Study for your exams but keep a balance too. Keep them in perspective - in the end your mental health is more important than qualifications. If you find new friends and immerse yourself in new activities you will find that the morale boost which that brings will help you do deal with exam stress more effectively.

    Keep your chin up and well done on going to speak to your doctor - all too many people suffer in silence. I struggled with depression for years as a student but slowly over time I managed to pull myself out of it. There is a light at the end of the tunnel.
    • Thread Starter


    Can you not access a university counselling service? The waiting list for NHS services is terrible but universities are usually much better. It might be enough to get you out of this rut a bit.

    In the mean time, as much as it feels like the thing you can't do, I would really advise trying to DO some things. If you think about it, would anyone be happy if they never went out and did anything interesting, didn't have hobbies and rarely saw friends? Probably not. Try and make it an aim to spend at least X hours a day doing something you used to enjoy or something productive even if you don't really feel like it.

    Sorry to hear things haven't been going well for you.

    Counselling would be a good option and I suggest you try it. The medication you're on may not be suitable for yourself so it may be worth asking to be put on a different brand or stronger pills, or try herbal medicine. Do you have anxiety? Depression is usually a side-effect of anxiety, so it may be worth addressing that illness if you do suffer from it.

    If you ever need a chat, PM me. I have depression too so I understand to some degree how you feel.
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