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    • Thread Starter

    Hello guys,

    I just started and attempted a paragraph answering a question from an English Lit - Unit 2 - 'Poetry Across Time' paper in tuition. I was wondering if I could get some help and advice from it.

    I just rewrote the paragraph a few times trying to get rid of the waffle in tuition and I want to prepare some solid paragraphs before I go again or anything tbh. Basically - I need to practice in general!

    I was wondering if someone could just give a prediction on the grade it is at the moment - I know it's hard as the answer is mark holistically when you complete it but just in general.

    Also, I know that in the mark scheme they expect you to meet the AO2 criteria 'explain how language, structure and form contribute to writers’ presentation of ideas,themes and settings', which I have not done at all. But I will do that in my combined essay definitely.

    Here is my answer:
    Question: What do you think the speaker feels about her daughter growing up and how does shepresent these feelings to the reader? [18 marks]

    Answer: The poet presents the speaker as anxious and depressed about her daughter. She uses a simile to illustrate that her daughter is becoming detached from her as she grows up and explores the different aspects of life: "the hair flapping behind you like a handkerchief waving goodbye." This implies that they share a strong bond as the mother is finding it difficult to leave her daughter. Furthermore, the handkerchief highlights the sadness of the parent and the fact that the daughter has to say goodbye to explore life alone highlights her fragility as she is now independent and doesn't have her mother's support through obstacles in life. Not only does this reinforce their relationship and that they are sort of attached, but also the handkerchief could be a metaphor for the emotions and the tears when her daughter leaves her. In addition, the description of the hair 'flapping' is related with a bird's movement in preparation for flight. Therefore, this could symbolise both: the daughter's enjoyment as she is on the bicycle or as she grows up and also that she is preparing to face the different aspects of life. Lastly, it could also connote the mother's panic and agitation regarding her daughter's departure.
    I just need some practice and some advice. In terms of questions, do you need to include the AO2 at the end of each paragraph so like when you talk about quote, do you have to talk about structure if it's in the quote in that paragraph, or can you just identify random structural techniques throughout the poem and talk about each of them in separate paragraphs?

    Also, if any of you really have a lot of time on your hands and can help me immensely.
    Can you please go through my paragraph and then mark it like an examiner would - so highlight it or something and write 'considered/qualified response to ideas/themes' or something like that, throughout the essay. Then, if you have more time - can you please write me an A* paragraph based on either that quote or any other quote in the poem and then mark it - "insightful exploratory response to ideas/themes" and explain to me why it has got A* and what does mine lack compared to it. Obviously, it will lack far too much and you can go write an essay about why mine is not A* - so maybe you could say the "person here has not only appreciated the writer's use of language but also evaluated it". The proper mark scheme with all the 'bands' is also attached at the bottom.

    If anyone prefers doing the above after I have fully finished the essay question, so produced a whole essay on it - finished and ready to be marked, please ask me - I can do that too!

    The resources:
    Paper - Question 9 (Extract is removed)
    Mark Scheme - Question 9

    I haven't attached anything below Band 3 for the mark scheme - there was not really space for the screenshot to fit and also anything below will mean fail I guess, so i'll get destroyed...

    At the moment, we've practically had no practice on Unseen Poetry at school - I don't think you even can, but I'm just going to analyse any poem I see now and practice like that. If the answer is so bad, just tell me - I'll have to seriously work on it.

    If you are really struggling to find the question or mark scheme and prefer to view it through images (maybe because you are on your phone or iPad etc), I have attached them here:
    Name:  Mark Scheme.png
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Size:  36.5 KBName:  Poem.png
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    Attached Images
    • Thread Starter

    Anyone? ...

    hello, just quickly read your paragraph. I think that it's very good, and well done for including close contextual analysis - many people forget about that😁 i will go through it properly in the morning, if help is still needed?

    Posted from TSR Mobile
    • Thread Starter

    (Original post by hannahrobinsxn)
    hello, just quickly read your paragraph. I think that it's very good, and well done for including close contextual analysis - many people forget about that😁 i will go through it properly in the morning, if help is still needed?

    Posted from TSR Mobile
    Thank you .
    Yeah, my exams haven't come yet and obviously advice at all times is essential - just keep giving advice ! It'd be great if you can read it whenever you are free.
    I'm going to start posting more stuff as the forum gets active as I need a lot of help tbh lol
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