The Student Room Group
Uni students - Complete our survey >>
Uni students - Complete our survey >>
Uni students - Complete our survey >>

He went for a not so pretty girl?

Scroll to see replies

what do you both look like and we can judge which is better without you naming whos who
Maybe he found her to be better looking than you/she is more attractive to him than you were. It really depends on the person, you are not prettier than her, no one is better than the other. it just depends on the person. I might say you look better than her but another might say she looks better than you.
You do sounds jealous though, he finds her better looking than you/better personality better something. End of.
Original post by Anonymous
Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, you may not see her as preety but he sees her as preety.


shut up Moses
Original post by Anonymous
I was seeing this guy who asked me out on a date and we got along REALLY well, we would laugh all of the time and we just clicked. I was always very sweet to him and he said I was funny. But then he told me that he wasn't looking for a relationship and that he wasn't attracted to me, that he felt no romantic attraction towards me. I'm really not an arrogant person at all and I'm so sorry if it comes across that way, but people compliment me a lot everyday and I used to model.

So barely 2 weeks later he gets a new girlfriend, and I'm so sorry for what I'm about to say [I'm usually not mean like this :frown:] but she's not conventionally.... gorgeous. I know people are going to say 'well her personality is obviously better than yours she's probably nicer' but I am a nice person and I'm sure she is too.

It's just the reason why I'm hurt is because he gave his reason for not wanting a relationship with me as not being attracted to me but literally everyone says that I'm far prettier than her.

So why did he lie about not wanting a relationship? And if looks were so important to him, why did he choose a girl that is not that pretty? I know 'beauty's in the eye of the beholder' but honestly this is on a conventional basis.

I really really apologise if I came across as horrible, vain or mean in this and I'm sorry for being nasty. I'm usually not like this :frown: Please forgive me x




Hi!!! I don't think you come off as vain at all and I think it is confidence to realize that you are pretty so dw! :tongue:
He probably lied to you because he didn't want to hurt your feelings even though I know there are better ways of doing it some people just can't do it!! Also you know some people just click with other people, it's hard to describe but it just feels right. I don't think that he chose her based on just physical appearance or personality, maybe because beauty is subjective he was attracted to her more? Honestly it's okay and time will heal, you'll definitely find someone one day so I hope you feel better soon!:h:
Original post by Anonymous
I was seeing this guy who asked me out on a date and we got along REALLY well, we would laugh all of the time and we just clicked. I was always very sweet to him and he said I was funny. But then he told me that he wasn't looking for a relationship and that he wasn't attracted to me, that he felt no romantic attraction towards me. I'm really not an arrogant person at all and I'm so sorry if it comes across that way, but people compliment me a lot everyday and I used to model.

So barely 2 weeks later he gets a new girlfriend, and I'm so sorry for what I'm about to say [I'm usually not mean like this :frown:] but she's not conventionally.... gorgeous. I know people are going to say 'well her personality is obviously better than yours she's probably nicer' but I am a nice person and I'm sure she is too.

It's just the reason why I'm hurt is because he gave his reason for not wanting a relationship with me as not being attracted to me but literally everyone says that I'm far prettier than her.

So why did he lie about not wanting a relationship? And if looks were so important to him, why did he choose a girl that is not that pretty? I know 'beauty's in the eye of the beholder' but honestly this is on a conventional basis.

I really really apologise if I came across as horrible, vain or mean in this and I'm sorry for being nasty. I'm usually not like this :frown: Please forgive me x



Well how do you know that looks are THE most important thing to him?:K:
Like many other people said on here, being attractive on the outside isn't the only factor that makes someone attracted to you. Personality, the vibe and the whole package counts really.
Maybe when he got to know you, he would have realised that he's just not into you in a romantic way as you have said, and only liked you as a friend? He probs felt different about the other girl clearly. I'm just confused on your logic on how you still think prettiness is the only factor people consider when dating:s-smilie:
And if only "gorgeous" people only dated "gorgeous" people, there won't be many of us around:colonhash:
I get your frustration but please do become a bit more open minded :redface:
(edited 8 years ago)
Reply 26
Avatar for llys
llys
17
He was just looking for something you don't have. It doesn't matter - there'll be plenty of guys who are looking for what you have.
Original post by Anonymous
I was seeing this guy who asked me out on a date and we got along REALLY well, we would laugh all of the time and we just clicked. I was always very sweet to him and he said I was funny. But then he told me that he wasn't looking for a relationship and that he wasn't attracted to me, that he felt no romantic attraction towards me. I'm really not an arrogant person at all and I'm so sorry if it comes across that way, but people compliment me a lot everyday and I used to model.

So barely 2 weeks later he gets a new girlfriend, and I'm so sorry for what I'm about to say [I'm usually not mean like this :frown:] but she's not conventionally.... gorgeous. I know people are going to say 'well her personality is obviously better than yours she's probably nicer' but I am a nice person and I'm sure she is too.

It's just the reason why I'm hurt is because he gave his reason for not wanting a relationship with me as not being attracted to me but literally everyone says that I'm far prettier than her.

So why did he lie about not wanting a relationship? And if looks were so important to him, why did he choose a girl that is not that pretty? I know 'beauty's in the eye of the beholder' but honestly this is on a conventional basis.

I really really apologise if I came across as horrible, vain or mean in this and I'm sorry for being nasty. I'm usually not like this :frown: Please forgive me x


How would you rate his physical and aesthetic attributes in comparison to your own? Sometimes, it's easier to develop empathy (and by extension, emotional intimacy) with someone otherwise perfectly-formed, who nevertheless diverges from the aesthetic orthodoxy in a specific but very pronounced way: I was bullied relentlessly for my appearance throughout childhood (before coming into my own as an adult), and whilst I'm not exactly a paragon of personality-priority in terms of my attitude towards dating, my ideal romantic partner would probably still have to embody that same 'ugly duckling' trope of idiosyncratic beauty to qualify as truly compatible. Even then, Lord only knows how many subtle come-ons or preludes to flirtation I've unwittingly rebuffed from women whom life itself has systematically conditioned me to perceive as unattainable.

Ultimately, we tend to choose people who complement our flaws as much as anything else. If you're ostensibly flawless, believe it or not, that can actually contra-indicate a relationship even when immediate personality and chemistry would seem to suggest otherwise.
(edited 8 years ago)
stop being so jealous and bitter you're not the prettiest girl in the world lol
he probably saw right through you and realised you're one of those vain narcissist girls
and just because you don't think she's pretty that doesn't mean she's automatically ugly that's just your opinion. he wasn't attracted to you so just get over yourself
Reply 29
Avatar for lucy_98
lucy_98
6
I'm sure she is beautiful in her own way and it's likely you are a bit bitter (not in a mean way whatsoever) about everything that happened so you're choosing to view her in a less than favourable light.
The other girl probably slept with him on their first date, so he wants to keep her around. Either that, or she's not a *****.
Reply 31
Avatar for AfcFob
AfcFob
18
He must just see something in her which he doesn't see in you.

Cheer up, if you're as pretty as you say I imagine so many guys would want you and wouldn't be an idiot like him for leading you on like that
Reply 32
Avatar for ~Tara~
~Tara~
16
Models are often unconventional looking rather than pretty, maybe she was prettier or just more to his tastes. Being good looking doesn't mean you're more entitled to someone you fancy than anyone else. To believe that would be arrogant.

I think you need to take it on the chin and move on.
Original post by Anonymous
stop being so jealous and bitter you're not the prettiest girl in the world lol
he probably saw right through you and realised you're one of those vain narcissist girls
and just because you don't think she's pretty that doesn't mean she's automatically ugly that's just your opinion. he wasn't attracted to you so just get over yourself

Whether the particular trait which, by societal decree, you most prize in yourself is brains or beauty, when that fortuitous product of happenstance has been encouraged over time to form a central pillar of your self-belief in competitive interactions, one would be hard-pressed upon experiencing such an unrecognisable (and seemingly, unaccountable) setback as the OP relates not to suffer some momentary crisis of confidence, and to try to rationalise that failure with reference to prior, inculcated modes of thought.

The only "jealous and bitter" tone I detect here emanates from your ridiculously self-righteous, vindictive and unwarranted character-assassination: so until you can stop projecting, I'd perhaps suggest you refrain from participation in threads which require a remotely nuanced understanding of the human psyche, because I personally find your lack of empathy to be far more indicative of narcissism than any position thus far asserted by the author of this thread.
(edited 8 years ago)
Original post by Biryani007
This completely...

OP you way see that girl as less attractive than you but he may find her more attractive...people like different things...


Sometimes beauty can be more objective than subjective though. Let's be honest, I don't think there is anyone on this planet who would think that Candice Swanepol or Megan Fox are less attractive than say Susan Boyle or
Lena Dunham.
Original post by Miss.Unknow
Maybe he found her to be better looking than you/she is more attractive to him than you were. It really depends on the person, you are not prettier than her, no one is better than the other. it just depends on the person. I might say you look better than her but another might say she looks better than you.


Original post by ~Tara~
Models are often unconventional looking rather than pretty, maybe she was prettier or just more to his tastes. Being good looking doesn't mean you're more entitled to someone you fancy than anyone else. To believe that would be arrogant.

I think you need to take it on the chin and move on.

I did glamour modelling not that much catwalk
Original post by Miss.Unknow
Maybe he found her to be better looking than you/she is more attractive to him than you were. It really depends on the person, you are not prettier than her, no one is better than the other. it just depends on the person. I might say you look better than her but another might say she looks better than you.

Idk, 8 of my guy friends said that she is a 2 or 3 at a push so....

She's really overweight and pale with greasy hair and her face is just not...pretty. This girl has been called ugly by people for years. I'm blonde blue eyed and a slim hourglass. I don't usually criticise people's looks yet there's people in this thread saying that she must be better looking than me but I wish I could post pics, obviously I should respect her privacy so I won't, but if I posted pics you would definitely see that's not the case..
Original post by Anonymous
Sometimes beauty can be more objective than subjective though. Let's be honest, I don't think there is anyone on this planet who would think that Candice Swanepol or Megan Fox are less attractive than say Susan Boyle or
Lena Dunham.


Exactly!! Thank you
Reply 38
Avatar for ~Tara~
~Tara~
16
Original post by Anonymous
Idk, 8 of my guy friends said that she is a 2 or 3 at a push so....

She's really overweight and pale with greasy hair and her face is just not...pretty. This girl has been called ugly by people for years. I'm blonde blue eyed and a slim hourglass. I don't usually criticise people's looks yet there's people in this thread saying that she must be better looking than me but I wish I could post pics, obviously I should respect her privacy so I won't, but if I posted pics you would definitely see that's not the case..


I don't think her looks really matter. As has already been said, people choose partners based on more than looks. Continually putting her down because you feel bitter doesn't really endear you to others. Maybe this is the kind of attitude that came through and put him off
Original post by Anonymous
Sometimes beauty can be more objective than subjective though. Let's be honest, I don't think there is anyone on this planet who would think that Candice Swanepol or Megan Fox are less attractive than say Susan Boyle or
Lena Dunham.


Of course...supermodels, compared to most people, win every time...

I doubt both OP and the other girl are on either end of the scale...for people that lie somewhere around the middle it does become subjective..

Also, attraction includes how you smile, walk, talk, etc...it's not just based on the features on your face.

Quick Reply

Related discussions

Latest

Trending

Trending

Articles for you