I don't know what to do about my therapist
I've been quite quiet about how therapy for OCD and everything is going but I feel I need to be honest now about how I feel about it.
I've been going to her since January and was an urgent referral from my GP so I didn't wait too long which was good and I was told that I should get an appointment at least every week because I was in a bad way which I wont go into but the therapist said she thinks just once a fortnight will do. Fair enough but I've only saw her once a fortnight at a max of 3 times. The rest of the time there has been a waiting gap of between 3 to 6 weeks between appointments. I have no other help bar her. I can't take meds due to my OCD contamination fears and my OCD was and still is crippling so I couldn't just man up and take a pill so it was therapy and self help, nothing more.
She cancels a lot of the time an hour or 2 before my appointment and there is no back up for me to visit if she is off, so that is an extra 2 or 3 weeks to see her again. If I cancelled as much as her, I would have been struck off the patient list.Therapy is a place you talk. You talk about big and major things. Well get this...apparently I talk too much! She would be moaning if I didn't talk at all! She has even admitted that she doesn't think her type of mindfulness based therapy will help me. Yeah, that made me feel brilliant to hear that just a few sessions in. I shouldn't feel the need to dull myself down at therapy. Everything I talk about there is relevant - things that happened in the past, my OCD fears, what triggers me etc - not random things like what I had to eat 3 days ago.
I don't want to sound like an arrogant bitch here but I am proud of what I have done in regards to making myself better through my conditions, well she said what I have done hasn't really helped me much. I was housebound for 6 months, couldn't even make it to my bins. I forced myself out of that. I made my challenge chart and look at me now 2/3 years on, I can go everywhere now, rarely have panic attack setbacks. If you have never had panics or been agoraphobic then you wouldn't believe how hard it is to climb up from being scared of going out your front door to building up to going out alone, going to town and all that. I am proud of that. I got myself out of that with help from family and friends and nothing more and she shot that down. The one thing in life that I am truly proud of, she belittled. I have confidence now that I never had all my life and she thinks what I done was useless?!
This isn't a dig at the NHS. I love the NHS, I think I just got the wrong therapist. I don't know what to do about it. I have mentioned it to my GP and she says to talk to the therapist about it but how awkward would that be?! I don't know whether I am justified in feeling how I feel about it or I am overreacting and should just grin and bear it.
If anyone has any advice or been in a similar situation with therapy please let me know.
I've been going to her since January and was an urgent referral from my GP so I didn't wait too long which was good and I was told that I should get an appointment at least every week because I was in a bad way which I wont go into but the therapist said she thinks just once a fortnight will do. Fair enough but I've only saw her once a fortnight at a max of 3 times. The rest of the time there has been a waiting gap of between 3 to 6 weeks between appointments. I have no other help bar her. I can't take meds due to my OCD contamination fears and my OCD was and still is crippling so I couldn't just man up and take a pill so it was therapy and self help, nothing more.
She cancels a lot of the time an hour or 2 before my appointment and there is no back up for me to visit if she is off, so that is an extra 2 or 3 weeks to see her again. If I cancelled as much as her, I would have been struck off the patient list.Therapy is a place you talk. You talk about big and major things. Well get this...apparently I talk too much! She would be moaning if I didn't talk at all! She has even admitted that she doesn't think her type of mindfulness based therapy will help me. Yeah, that made me feel brilliant to hear that just a few sessions in. I shouldn't feel the need to dull myself down at therapy. Everything I talk about there is relevant - things that happened in the past, my OCD fears, what triggers me etc - not random things like what I had to eat 3 days ago.
I don't want to sound like an arrogant bitch here but I am proud of what I have done in regards to making myself better through my conditions, well she said what I have done hasn't really helped me much. I was housebound for 6 months, couldn't even make it to my bins. I forced myself out of that. I made my challenge chart and look at me now 2/3 years on, I can go everywhere now, rarely have panic attack setbacks. If you have never had panics or been agoraphobic then you wouldn't believe how hard it is to climb up from being scared of going out your front door to building up to going out alone, going to town and all that. I am proud of that. I got myself out of that with help from family and friends and nothing more and she shot that down. The one thing in life that I am truly proud of, she belittled. I have confidence now that I never had all my life and she thinks what I done was useless?!
This isn't a dig at the NHS. I love the NHS, I think I just got the wrong therapist. I don't know what to do about it. I have mentioned it to my GP and she says to talk to the therapist about it but how awkward would that be?! I don't know whether I am justified in feeling how I feel about it or I am overreacting and should just grin and bear it.
If anyone has any advice or been in a similar situation with therapy please let me know.
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Can you not request another therapist?
Your current one doesn't sound understanding at all
Your current one doesn't sound understanding at all
Original post by Eternalflames
Can you not request another therapist?
Your current one doesn't sound understanding at all
Your current one doesn't sound understanding at all
My GP didn't suggest that when I told her how unhappy I am with my current therapist. Maybe its because of how long waiting lists usually are for counselling and therapy
In my experience they were really open about switching therapists and all mine said even if i felt they didn't suit me i could ask for someone else and they're not supposed to be offended although she doesn't sound too professional.
Just tell her you feel like your not progressing or something along those lines and ask to see someone else. If she doesn't refer you, contact the service. And let them know how urgently you need help.
Also maybe look at CBT? I don't know how useful it is for OCD but it's really successful and very evidence based for anxiety and depression etc. so maybe see if you might prefer that?
Just tell her you feel like your not progressing or something along those lines and ask to see someone else. If she doesn't refer you, contact the service. And let them know how urgently you need help.
Also maybe look at CBT? I don't know how useful it is for OCD but it's really successful and very evidence based for anxiety and depression etc. so maybe see if you might prefer that?
(edited 8 years ago)
Original post by Spock's Socks
My GP didn't suggest that when I told her how unhappy I am with my current therapist. Maybe its because of how long waiting lists usually are for counselling and therapy
Yeah, would you be better off just cancelling the therapy sessions with the current one. If they're not helping you, you're better off without them, and you have made good progress by yourself so you shouldn't need her.
Original post by uchihaitachi
In my experience they were really open about switching therapists and all mine said even if i felt they didn't suit me i could ask for someone else and they're not supposed to be offended although she doesn't sound too professional.
Just tell her you feel like your not progressing or something along those lines and ask to see someone else. If she doesn't refer you, contact the service. And let them know how urgently you need help.
Also maybe look at CBT? I don't know how useful it is for OCD but it's really successful and very evidence based for anxiety and depression etc. so maybe see if you might prefer that?
Just tell her you feel like your not progressing or something along those lines and ask to see someone else. If she doesn't refer you, contact the service. And let them know how urgently you need help.
Also maybe look at CBT? I don't know how useful it is for OCD but it's really successful and very evidence based for anxiety and depression etc. so maybe see if you might prefer that?
She said she wouldn't recommend CBT for my OCD because that's what I was basically doing myself for my panic attacks and it never helped OCD. That's bloody stupid to me. They are two totally different conditions and CBT isn't just one size fits all, you have to tweak it for different conditions but she just said it would be useless from the start.
I was meant to be getting ERP which I think its a type of CBT therapy for OCD but she said no because I had been doing that on my own and it hadn't helped. Yeah but maybe I was missing something from doing it on my own and sometimes you need the guidance from a therapist to succeed. So all she wants me to do is pretty much meditate even though she's admitted it won't cure or maybe not even help me.
Excuse my French but she's ****** useless
Posted from TSR Mobile
Original post by Eternalflames
Yeah, would you be better off just cancelling the therapy sessions with the current one. If they're not helping you, you're better off without them, and you have made good progress by yourself so you shouldn't need her.
Yeah you are right. I would rather wait months for one that will help me than continue with one that isn't getting me anywhere. Its just going about getting a new one that confuses me because my GP isn't up for referring me to a new one and I really don't have the guts to tell the therapist I want someone else
Posted from TSR Mobile
ERP is what i dis with mt therapist to help with my OCD. Guess what it worked!
Your therapist doesnt sound very good tbh
Im not sure she knows what shes talking about.
I would cancel everything with her and get a new therapist.
ERP does work for OCD because ive tried it and have gotten a lot better because of it!
I was housebound at one point but it helped me to get out of the house and not be as fearful on contamination anymore.
Granted im not fully better but im getting there.
Hopefully this helps you.
Ive also done a blog on OCD if youre interested in reading btw. Dont know if it will help you anymore.
Your therapist doesnt sound very good tbh
Im not sure she knows what shes talking about.
I would cancel everything with her and get a new therapist.
ERP does work for OCD because ive tried it and have gotten a lot better because of it!
I was housebound at one point but it helped me to get out of the house and not be as fearful on contamination anymore.
Granted im not fully better but im getting there.
Hopefully this helps you.
Ive also done a blog on OCD if youre interested in reading btw. Dont know if it will help you anymore.
Original post by Spock's Socks
She said she wouldn't recommend CBT for my OCD because that's what I was basically doing myself for my panic attacks and it never helped OCD. That's bloody stupid to me. They are two totally different conditions and CBT isn't just one size fits all, you have to tweak it for different conditions but she just said it would be useless from the start.
I was meant to be getting ERP which I think its a type of CBT therapy for OCD but she said no because I had been doing that on my own and it hadn't helped. Yeah but maybe I was missing something from doing it on my own and sometimes you need the guidance from a therapist to succeed. So all she wants me to do is pretty much meditate even though she's admitted it won't cure or maybe not even help me.
Excuse my French but she's ****** useless
Posted from TSR Mobile
I was meant to be getting ERP which I think its a type of CBT therapy for OCD but she said no because I had been doing that on my own and it hadn't helped. Yeah but maybe I was missing something from doing it on my own and sometimes you need the guidance from a therapist to succeed. So all she wants me to do is pretty much meditate even though she's admitted it won't cure or maybe not even help me.
Excuse my French but she's ****** useless
Posted from TSR Mobile
She sounds terrible so i would suggest you call the service and ask them what they feel is best for your treatment. I personally wouldn't trust her but obviously it's your call. In my phone interview thing they gave me the standard talking therapy and CBT options for my conditions but they strongly suggested CBT so it's worth seeing what they think.
Also i agree that its better to wait a bit and get much better help and struggle short term which will be nothing once you start getting proper help and seeing changes. For me it took me three go's with different therapists before therapy started to help at all.
Original post by FireFreezer77
ERP is what i dis with mt therapist to help with my OCD. Guess what it worked!
Your therapist doesnt sound very good tbh
Im not sure she knows what shes talking about.
I would cancel everything with her and get a new therapist.
ERP does work for OCD because ive tried it and have gotten a lot better because of it!
I was housebound at one point but it helped me to get out of the house and not be as fearful on contamination anymore.
Granted im not fully better but im getting there.
Hopefully this helps you.
Ive also done a blog on OCD if youre interested in reading btw. Dont know if it will help you anymore.
Your therapist doesnt sound very good tbh
Im not sure she knows what shes talking about.
I would cancel everything with her and get a new therapist.
ERP does work for OCD because ive tried it and have gotten a lot better because of it!
I was housebound at one point but it helped me to get out of the house and not be as fearful on contamination anymore.
Granted im not fully better but im getting there.
Hopefully this helps you.
Ive also done a blog on OCD if youre interested in reading btw. Dont know if it will help you anymore.
Yeah I've heard great things about ERP for OCD so I was surprised when she shot it down instantly because it seems to be the first form of therapy for OCD. I think maybe she is more used to dealing with things like anxiety and depression and maybe doesn't know much about OCD. Yeah send me the blog and I'll have a look at it
Do some research into non NHS services too. There are charities out there for counselling and they often have less pressure to keep the sessions down.
This therapist really isn't good. Under their logic no one would suit CBT - because we all try to use thoughts to manage our behaviour and emotions but often the thoughts we use hurt rather than help and that's how we find ourselves in therapy!
This therapist really isn't good. Under their logic no one would suit CBT - because we all try to use thoughts to manage our behaviour and emotions but often the thoughts we use hurt rather than help and that's how we find ourselves in therapy!
Original post by Spock's Socks
Yeah I've heard great things about ERP for OCD so I was surprised when she shot it down instantly because it seems to be the first form of therapy for OCD. I think maybe she is more used to dealing with things like anxiety and depression and maybe doesn't know much about OCD. Yeah send me the blog and I'll have a look at it
ERP works really well so im suprised she shot it down too! It was the first thing that was reccomended for me to have. It works really well!!
I guess so. Alhough OCD is a form of anxiety but its quite unique i think.
But id absolutelt reccomend looking into getting a new therapist or maybe even having private therapy?
Ok ill tag you in it.
Original post by FireFreezer77
ERP works really well so im suprised she shot it down too! It was the first thing that was reccomended for me to have. It works really well!!
I guess so. Alhough OCD is a form of anxiety but its quite unique i think.
But id absolutelt reccomend looking into getting a new therapist or maybe even having private therapy?
Ok ill tag you in it.
I guess so. Alhough OCD is a form of anxiety but its quite unique i think.
But id absolutelt reccomend looking into getting a new therapist or maybe even having private therapy?
Ok ill tag you in it.
I had private counselling in the past but it was about £40 a session and I am only on ESA so there's no way I could afford that when I have a house to keep, driving lessons and all that jazz
Original post by Spock's Socks
I had private counselling in the past but it was about £40 a session and I am only on ESA so there's no way I could afford that when I have a house to keep, driving lessons and all that jazz
Ok fair enough.
I didnt realize that.
But look into getting a new therapist is my advice!
Original post by FireFreezer77
Ok fair enough.
I didnt realize that.
But look into getting a new therapist is my advice!
I didnt realize that.
But look into getting a new therapist is my advice!
Thanks for tagging me in your blog. Its a good read
my mum has OCD too and your experience with it and symptoms sound a lot like hers. My contamination fears and then the related compulsions are mostly to do with drugs and toxins instead of germs like hers and I have a lot of 'magical thinking' as docs seem to call it with my OCD. Its a nightmare. I've had since I was about 5 and dealt with it on my own until last year when I took a breakdown and developed an eating disorder from it. I hate how OCD gets played down as a joke or just some little quirk. It takes up your full life and for me it affects what I eat, touch, drink, say, do, think etc. Its a full time condition with no breaks.My mum is going to go with me to the docs next week to discuss getting a new therapist. She is more vocal and forceful than me so she'll make sure that I get somewhere. I feel a bit weird that I am nearly 24 and my mum is doing the talking for me but if it gets me help, then I shouldn't care.
@Spock's Socks dont know why this didnt quote! :/
Its ok and thankyou!!
It sounds awful what you have!! I sure hope things improve soon for you!
It must be extremely challenging to carry out everyday tasks because of this!
I also hatw how its often played down as a joke! See my mind is always full of these intrusive thoughts i get so i never get a break either!
Thats why i started the blog really. To try and raise some awareness as to how serious OCD actually is!!
Im guessing youre quiet like me?
But it will get the point across! And hopefuly things will be on the up from them onwards!
Good Luck!!
Its ok and thankyou!!
It sounds awful what you have!! I sure hope things improve soon for you!
It must be extremely challenging to carry out everyday tasks because of this!
I also hatw how its often played down as a joke! See my mind is always full of these intrusive thoughts i get so i never get a break either!
Thats why i started the blog really. To try and raise some awareness as to how serious OCD actually is!!
Im guessing youre quiet like me?
But it will get the point across! And hopefuly things will be on the up from them onwards!
Good Luck!!
(edited 8 years ago)
Original post by FireFreezer77
@Spock's Socks dont know why this didnt quote! :/
Its ok and thankyou!!
It sounds awful what you have!! I sure hope things improve soon for you!
It must be extremely challenging to carry out everyday tasks because of this!
I also hatw how its often played down as a joke! See my mind is always full of these intrusive thoughts i get so i never get a break either!
Thats why i started the blog really. To try and raise some awareness as to how serious OCD actually is!!
Im guessing youre quiet like me?
But it will get the point across! And hopefuly things will be on the up from them onwards!
Good Luck!!
Its ok and thankyou!!
It sounds awful what you have!! I sure hope things improve soon for you!
It must be extremely challenging to carry out everyday tasks because of this!
I also hatw how its often played down as a joke! See my mind is always full of these intrusive thoughts i get so i never get a break either!
Thats why i started the blog really. To try and raise some awareness as to how serious OCD actually is!!
Im guessing youre quiet like me?
But it will get the point across! And hopefuly things will be on the up from them onwards!
Good Luck!!
Yeah that is why I am open about OCD too because out of all the mental health conditions out there, this seemed to be one of the most misunderstood and one that is played down. I try and educate people where I can about it but without trying to annoy them if possible
yeah we do sound quite similar. There seems to be quite a lot of people that have OCD on here yet the only person I know in real life with it also is my mum. Thanks! Hoping for the best next week when I see my GP
