I honestly don't remember last decent birthday, lol for my 18th my friends bought me haribos but i can't eat things that are haram and my relations give me religious books...
This year was awful though, I had a coursework deadline so I finished that early in the morning, then I had a group presentation where my one of my team members accidently took my slides so i had to improvise doing their slides and really did awful because it was not prepared for that, I felt really awful about my presentation.
I go to the student union straight after feeling negative about my presentation to get cheered up by my friends, I got told that they are going out to eat, so I thought I'd be tagging along but they meet up with food with them, I was so hungry, its not their fault though.
Then later this nasty girl came to join us, she isn't even our friend and she then has the audacity to tell me to my face that I don't contribute to the student union when I have 5 roles in the union as well as managing my course. I'm very passionate about our student experience and to be put down was awful, I got very anxious and left hanging out with my friends to go home, I then fell asleep woke up at 2am and missed my whole day, that was meant to be special.
The only positive was that 100 people posted on my wall to say happy birthday, however no one made any plans with me, no one got me a card, I didn't get a single present this year and I only had one meal that day which was breakfast.
Now today I tried to be positive, when people ask me how my birthday was I lie and say it was good etc just so people don't think I'm being negative and trying to take sympathy because its hardly an issue. I went to a smoothie place on my own, at lunch on my own, coffee on my own, shopping on my own, I treated myself to feel better about myself but inside I feel so lonely. I messaged all my friends that we should go watch jungle book today they all had excuses which was fair, at least I tried making plans.
Most students think I have so many friends because I know a lot of people and a lot of people know me, so they probably think I have other friends that I can hang out with but in reality I have no one that would hang out with me no matter how kind and helpful I am to people.
I'm trying hard to keep positive knowing that people don't care, they expect me take as many steps for them but are never gonna take a step towards me unless they need something.
I swear my birthdays are getting worst each year...
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