Dear You, A Poem For You.

I wrote these two poems in the last week and just wanted to share them with you.


It's been a few months since you've come back Things are getting better, maybe something this time will last I hope this is more than just me dreamingWishful thinking, our ships maybe sailing We can possibly build a new road honey A new home, a new place, we don't have to be so lonely You think I think that I'm too good for youWhen in reality I'm just to insecure babe, that's the real truthMaybe I don't deserve you after allMaybe this is just another trap in which I'm about to fall Maybe we might stand a chance in some other lifeBut maybe it's not today, maybe what you say is true: it's the wrong time If you want to leave again then maybe you should just go Pack your bags while I brace myself for the storm I think you want to lose us again in time Is it something that's in your blood or are you actually to much in love with her to be mine? I guess I've finally learnt how to play this game The rules are harsh, but maybe they are what makes us stay We take turns texting each other each day And when someone breaks the rules, it's the same pain all over again Maybe this is too much of a burden for you You've got what you wanted to, there's nothing left to do You know all my strengths and all by weaknesses and maybe that bores you Maybe I should have never let by guard down when you asked me to for you Maybe I should have listened to her and him and them and stayed far far away Maybe then I would have been safe from all of your torturous painMaybe I should have realized it when they said That you're just a casino pulling me closer to what's wrong with every passing day Maybe, I should have listened to it allMaybe I should have chosen myself over you, after allMaybe I should have realized it when you started to run away without looking backEven when you heard me fall so hard and you knew everything for me just collapsed Maybe, just maybe I could have done something different And maybe, just maybe, life would be a bit better... It has been a long, tough day And for some reason my head couldn't stop screaming out your name You came like a hurricane and then suddenly disappeared into flames And one day I am perfectly fine, the next day I am not even close to okay I go and take and swallow them over and over again In hopes that they will help me get numb and the memories fade Even if it is just for an hour at least I won't have any regrets apart from not leaving when you didn't even wanted to stay Picturing myself in the same hallway again And picturing you right next to me just like that other day I never knew at that time that one day this is how we'd be With you as the captain of the pirate and me being the one drowning in the sea I find it so damn bewildering even though to her it's clearThat you are just playing games, you're not here to actually be here You've probably got some back up plans of moving on But darling, all my hopes and dreams always end up on you, once and for all You cease to believe in everything that I do or say But you expect me to believe you, even when what you are saying is not okay I'm so tired of chasing you night and all day I've got blisters from running and I just wished it 22nd May never came How that day turned everything over The verses, the promises, the oaths, those hearts, were there no more We locked each other out, just like we didn't care And I promise you, I've got regrets about it to the day I didn't wanted to leave you ever, I swearAnd now when I look at you, it's just that you have changed 3 years is a very long time to go on and not look back babeBut did I ever tell you that I never left the place where we wanted to build a home and stay Looking at you now, I feel bad, I feel what I felt all over again But you don't give a damn and keep on playing your games You keep on judging me by your own standards And then here I am, making hearts and flowers at the cold pages, to warm them upI'm sorry but I don't know what to do anymore I don't want to do what is expected to do when you are running cold For some reason, I want to get up over and over again and fight Even if I lose, at least I can say that I triedSo go on and throw all that you can at me I'm not the same girl I was back when I was in my middle teens I'm a fighter, a survivor that you might be able to get for now But darling when the clocks ticks 12, the tables will turn, it's a vow

Excellent
I like it