Looking young for age...should this policy be introduced

No. You should bring your ID next time or all times when ordering alcohol. Some people have baby faces. If you shown them your ID, it would have fixed the problem. I don't think that would be a very good policy. Some people look way older than they actually are so a waiter could serve a person under 16 alcohol easily. You should keep your ID with you at all times.

I wasn't actually ordering alcohol, it annoyed me on principle that they assumed I was a child. And I agree that they should ask for ID if you look under 25; they can't assume that you're over 18 if you look under 25. My point is that for the same reason, they shouldn't assume that you're under 18 if you look over 12 [or something similar]. So although I expect to be asked for ID if I order wine, I don't expect my wine glass to be taken with the assumption that I am not old enough. Like I say, if you look 12-25 then they shouldn't make an assumption either way. Since they take wine glasses from children but not adults, by taking my wine glass they are stating "We think you are clearly under 18" [or 16, if they are thinking of the law which allows 16/17 year olds to drink beer, cider or wine in a restaurant with an adult].

I am 21 but look young for my age. This has been a problem for years but I have really had enough now. I visited a restaurant tonight with my father and brother (who is 17 and also looks young for his age). The waitress immediately took away the wine glasses from me and my brother but not our dad, i.e. the reason was clearly that she thought I was a child. I found it bad enough to have my wine glass taken at a restaurant when I was a child but having been old enough to drink for over 3 years [technically 5 actually as it was in a restaurant with my father who is clearly an adult] it is just unbelievable and I wonder when this will ever stop. I didn't really have any way of asserting my age as I wasn't drinking alcohol on this trip but nonetheless I felt embarrassed and humiliated. So I was thinking, in the same way that supermarkets have a "Think 25" policy, perhaps restaurants should have a "Think 12" policy, for example, whereby they only automatically take away a "child's" wine glass if they are clearly under 12. If a customer looks aged 12-25 then they should either just leave the wine glass or ask the customer's age. After all, when I go to a restaurant I am paying to be looked after, not to be insulted, embarrassed and humiliated. I think that as things are waiters just make an assumption about the customer's age without much thought, so they might equally not take away a child's wine glass if they look old for their age!

On another recent restaurant trip I ordered a mojito. The waiter said "a virgin one?" to which I replied "no, with the alcohol". He then asked my dad if he allowed it, who said yes. After a few minutes the waiter came back and asked for my ID. How crazy is that?

You might think there's no real harm done but this extends to situations where I could be treated as a criminal; recently I bought a train ticket at a ticket office. The member of staff sold me a child ticket automatically. I noticed just before getting on the train and as an honest person, I went back to the ticket office and got them to change it. But I was wondering, if I hadn't noticed, and the ticket inspector asked my age, could I have been prosecuted? Even though I never asked for a child ticket and never would! Or would the member of staff at the ticket office have been penalised? I'm assuming that if it happened at a museum then I wouldn't get in trouble...this is a controversial issue as if my parents are paying then of course they don't want me to assert my age!

I wasn't actually ordering alcohol, it annoyed me on principle that they assumed I was a child. And I agree that they should ask for ID if you look under 25; they can't assume that you're over 18 if you look under 25. My point is that for the same reason, they shouldn't assume that you're under 18 if you look over 12 [or something similar]. So although I expect to be asked for ID if I order wine, I don't expect my wine glass to be taken with the assumption that I am not old enough. Like I say, if you look 12-25 then they shouldn't make an assumption either way. Since they take wine glasses from children but not adults, by taking my wine glass they are stating "We think you are clearly under 18" [or 16, if they are thinking of the law which allows 16/17 year olds to drink beer, cider or wine in a restaurant with an adult].

How are servers going to avoid assuming someone isn't 18?

They should be trained not to assume. If I'm in my university city with friends the server would probably assume I'm over 18 but in my home city with my Dad they assume I'm under 18. I'm the same person though, so the circumstances should not make a difference!

The onus is on the establishment to prevent underage drinking. Taking away wine glasses could be seen as a natural extension of that obligation.

The whole point is that I am not underage!

But if you look underage then it's their requirement to ID you. Whether you are or not is irrelevant, waiters cannot be expected to know how old you are straight away.

Besides, be thankful you've never had a coworker say to you, on your 21st birthday, that they thought you were at least 30 (like I have).

Believe me if you were like me you'd rather look 30. Asking for ID is fine but taking my wine glass suggests they think that there is no way that I am old enough to drink. That is insulting.

I am 21 but look young for my age. This has been a problem for years but I have really had enough now. I visited a restaurant tonight with my father and brother (who is 17 and also looks young for his age). The waitress immediately took away the wine glasses from me and my brother but not our dad, i.e. the reason was clearly that she thought I was a child. I found it bad enough to have my wine glass taken at a restaurant when I was a child but having been old enough to drink for over 3 years [technically 5 actually as it was in a restaurant with my father who is clearly an adult] it is just unbelievable and I wonder when this will ever stop. I didn't really have any way of asserting my age as I wasn't drinking alcohol on this trip but nonetheless I felt embarrassed and humiliated. So I was thinking, in the same way that supermarkets have a "Think 25" policy, perhaps restaurants should have a "Think 12" policy, for example, whereby they only automatically take away a "child's" wine glass if they are clearly under 12. If a customer looks aged 12-25 then they should either just leave the wine glass or ask the customer's age. After all, when I go to a restaurant I am paying to be looked after, not to be insulted, embarrassed and humiliated. I think that as things are waiters just make an assumption about the customer's age without much thought, so they might equally not take away a child's wine glass if they look old for their age!

On another recent restaurant trip I ordered a mojito. The waiter said "a virgin one?" to which I replied "no, with the alcohol". He then asked my dad if he allowed it, who said yes. After a few minutes the waiter came back and asked for my ID. How crazy is that?

You might think there's no real harm done but this extends to situations where I could be treated as a criminal; recently I bought a train ticket at a ticket office. The member of staff sold me a child ticket automatically. I noticed just before getting on the train and as an honest person, I went back to the ticket office and got them to change it. But I was wondering, if I hadn't noticed, and the ticket inspector asked my age, could I have been prosecuted? Even though I never asked for a child ticket and never would! Or would the member of staff at the ticket office have been penalised? I'm assuming that if it happened at a museum then I wouldn't get in trouble...this is a controversial issue as if my parents are paying then of course they don't want me to assert my age!

They should be trained not to assume. If I'm in my university city with friends the server would probably assume I'm over 18 but in my home city with my Dad they assume I'm under 18. I'm the same person though, so the circumstances should not make a difference!

On the bright side, when you're 50, people will assume you're 35! Maybe, its not all bad in the long term?