He is way more experienced than me...

So, I have been talking to this guy for a while now, and we have been on a date. I think things are becoming more serious.

But, he is the worst flirt ever, and he is also way more experienced than me. He has talked to and dated so many more girls. I think he flirts with almost every girl. But he tells me that he genuinely likes me. But how do I know that I am not being played?

Does this make his feelings for me redundant, and should I stop talking to him, or can I still take him seriously?

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Reply 1

socialdisaster

You can usually get a good feel for a guy by talking to the girls he's dated in the past, or at least to their friends. If the gossip about him is negative then I'd stay away :smile:

Reply 2

priyaasin

Original post by Anonymous

Spoiler

Depends on how you feel...Do you genuinely like him? Are you flirty also?

Stop texting him for a while....maybe just a test if you're not too sure
Love him for who he is, accept him as he is.Maybe he has a sweet personality, and his sweetness is mistaken for flirt-i-ness..or he genuinely likes flirting.
Know he's had experience, but think that with him, you'll get experience too.

Go out with him for casual whatevers eg lunches and stuff like that. Be friendly with his parents, this will open you up to his style of life

If he genuinely likes you it'll show when and if he reveals truthful things to you such as his relationship with his parents, his siblings, his past GFS etc

Hold your head high, and dont giggle as often as you would around him. Just nod and talk...and accept him for who he is...Over time you will know

best of luck

Reply 3

Anonymous #1

Original post by socialdisaster

You can usually get a good feel for a guy by talking to the girls he's dated in the past, or at least to their friends. If the gossip about him is negative then I'd stay away :smile:

I havent listened to any of the gossip but I have been seeing some of his old conversations :redface:

Reply 4

Anonymous #1

Original post by priyaasin

He lives quite far away... But, thanks :biggrin:

Reply 5

socialdisaster

Original post by Anonymous

I havent listened to any of the gossip but I have been seeing some of his old conversations :redface:

Well, were they decent? :wink:

Reply 6

DanteTheDoorKnob

Original post by socialdisaster

You can usually get a good feel for a guy by talking to the girls he's dated in the past, or at least to their friends. If the gossip about him is negative then I'd stay away :smile:

So your advice is to ask someone's enemies what they think of them? Do you have any friends?

Reply 7

Hopefully1

Well, there is actually no way to know in the beginning if you are being played. If you like this guy then go out again. But, my opinion would be for YOU to take the 'drivers seat' in this relationship and don't 'fall for him' - grow into the relationship. Tell him you want to go slow (if you do, and also if you think you might be being played) and if he genuinely likes you he'll go slow without any pressure from him. If you're not comfortable w/ the pace or he wants to push things and is like 'we've been on 3 dates time to sleep together' then he most likely is just wanting sex. That doesn't mean he doesn't genuinely like you but if his words are sincere then his actions will be sincere too and he will go at your pace.... whatever that may be. He may like to just flirt or he may be a player but one thing for sure is if he genuinely likes you for you he'll be happy dating and going at your pace. Time is the only way to tell.

Reply 8

Anonymous #1

Original post by socialdisaster

Well, were they decent? :wink:

They were very flirtatious but he doesn't seem to be flirting as much recently. Maybe I am just jealous :redface:

Reply 9

samina_ay

You can just bluntly ask him if he likes you in a romantic way and if he is serious, to cut all this trouble.

Reply 10

socialdisaster

Original post by DanteTheDoorKnob

So your advice is to ask someone's enemies what they think of them? Do you have any friends?

If your experience of relationships is that exes are always enemies then you've been doing something wrong :tongue:

girls have gotta look out for each other. My ex was a decent guy, just a little immature, and that's precisely what I'd tell anyone who asked.

Reply 11

socialdisaster

Original post by Anonymous

They were very flirtatious but he doesn't seem to be flirting as much recently. Maybe I am just jealous :redface:

If he's toned it down then it's definitely a positive thing :biggrin:

and jealousy is natural, it would just be an issue if you were in an official relationship and he was still flirting with other people

Reply 12

samina_ay

Original post by socialdisaster

If your experience of relationships is that exes are always enemies then you've been doing something wrong :tongue:

girls have gotta look out for each other. My ex was a decent guy, just a little immature, and that's precisely what I'd tell anyone who asked.

Ex's are EXamples of what you shouldn't date in the future. They are an EX for a reason thats why they EXit out of your life.

I havent ever heard of a happy break up, lol imagine xD - break ups are sad..

Reply 13

bob5124

Original post by socialdisaster

You can usually get a good feel for a guy by talking to the girls he's dated in the past, or at least to their friends. If the gossip about him is negative then I'd stay away :smile:

Getting into stalker territory here.

Reply 14

DanteTheDoorKnob

Original post by bob5124

Getting into stalker territory here.

Girls do it tho. It's annoying when they talk to guys you knew like 6 years ago. I wasn't a knob or anything but are you that dumb you think this guy actually knows anything about me :lol:

Reply 15

socialdisaster

Original post by samina_ay

Nah, sometimes you're just not right for a person and it doesn't work out. For some reason people are set on hating their exes and it's always puzzled me. Life's much easier when you drop the blame game and just accept that it didn't work for a reason.

Reply 16

DanteTheDoorKnob

Original post by socialdisaster

I don't think you've ever had strong feelings for an ex :lol:

Reply 17

socialdisaster

Original post by bob5124

Getting into stalker territory here.

If it saves you from making a mistake then I don't see the issue. Some guys are dicks and it doesn't show until later. Same goes for girls.

Original post by DanteTheDoorKnob

I don't think you've ever had strong feelings for an ex :lol:

Perhaps not :tongue:

Reply 18

samina_ay

Original post by socialdisaster

And that takes time unfortunately.

Reply 19

Bang Outta Order

Original post by samina_ay

Nah I have, like with mutual breakups we then usually remain friends or cordial. I find it mighty immature to be emotionally traumatised or enemies after a break up. I'd rather us continue as friends if it's a mutual break up. Obviously a bad break up like screaming, shouting would leave animosity between us but I would refuse to remain sad or to hold a grudge. I'm normally content with a break up so I move on quite peacefully, I dunno about others.