Teacher used to love me, now he ignores me?

It's a complicated love story of differences. My chemistry teacher Who is male. Really cares and admires me a lot. He used to have so much sympathy and care because he knew I was going through so much stress in my life. His kindness made me smile, and I began to trust him. Occasionally at lunch, I would go talk to him about my troubles. Therefore We both began to have a slight interest...in each other. Although he doesn't look have supermodel features. I love him for his professional, kind hearted, and mature personality. When I cut my hair, he really acknowledged how nice it looked. And from them onwards he began to talk and visit myform room occasionally. He loved speaking with me, because he said that he admires my kind nature for other people. Like began to turn into love. I can't believe I'm saying this, but I actually loved him. I began to feel like he felt the same. The thoughts in my mind, were out of control. I was uncomfortable yet curious about this love between us. My actions became slightly and subtlyflirtaious,because it felt like I had to do it. It was this unconscious feeling, and he seemed to go with it....After months and months.he began to deliberately not treat me with the occasional kindness. He doesn't even talk to me, my heart is kinda broken and I have actually had an emotional breakdown just thinking about it. I miss his kindness. But at some point I must get over it, and tell myself that this is not right. But there is this other side of me that is still upset

(edited 7 years ago)

Reply 1

mikeymk

Original post by meemeekat

It's a complicated love story of differences. My chemistry teacher Who is male. Really cares and admires me a lot. He used to have so much sympathy and care because he knew I was going through so much stress in my life. His kindness made me smile, and I began to trust him. Occasionally at lunch, I would go talk to him about my troubles. We both were interested in each other. Although he doesn't look have supermodel features. I love him for his professional, kind hearted, and mature personality. When I cut my hair, he really acknowledged how nice it looked. And from them onwards he began to talk and visit myform room occasionally. He loved speaking with me, because he said that he admires my kind nature for other people. Like began to turn into love. I loved him. I began to feel like he felt the same. The thoughts in my mind, were out of control. I was uncomfortable yet curious about this love between us. My actions became slightly and subtlyflirtaious, and he seemed to go with it. Later he began to deliberately not treat me with the occasional kindness. He doesn't even talk to me, my heart is broken and I have actually had an emotional breakdown. I miss his kindness. But at some point I must get over it, and tell myself that this is not right

I think maybe the reason that hes stopped with the occasional kindness is that he's worried about his career, at first he may have gone with the subtylflirtaious talk, but then on further reflection, realised how it may look to other teachers and pupils (I say look because I presume he wasn't going to have a relationship), I'm not blaming you for your feelings and I completely agree, you have to get over it, but if he starts being friendly again, don't repeat this mistake and just have a good student teacher relationship, as nothing good can come of it if it progressed into anything more.

Reply 2

folieadeux

He realized that what he was doing was hella illegal. Decided not to run the risk of losing his teaching career and be branded a sex offender for the rest of his life. You'll get over it.

He's a pedo.

Your teacher probably realised he was going the way of the pedo smh

Reply 5

chikane

Maybe other students noticed how you both were acting and they decided to tell a teacher about it and maybe he was spoken to? thats why he is distant.
You could ask him if everything is okay but like others have said he might be worried about risking his career.

Reply 6

CCC75

Original post by meemeekat

My actions became slightly and subtlyflirtaious,because it felt like I had to do it. It was this unconscious feeling, and he seemed to go with it...he began to deliberately not treat me with the occasional kindness. He doesn't even talk to me...

It suddenly dawned on this teacher that whilst he was being kind, engaging and encouraging, all well within the remit of a good teacher, you were misreading this as him liking you in a romantic sense and you were becoming increasingly flirtatious with him. He therefore withdrew his attention completely and immediately. This man has good sense.

Reply 7

meemeekat

when i see him in class, i get so uncomfortable now, that i just get so nervous. Because when i look at him now, a range of emotions flood my mind. the emotions are both good and bad, it's so messed up and complicated. Just need to forget that this has happened. i CANNOT get over this time when i was sat working on the desk, and he walked up behind me, put both hands on both sides of my arms. i wasn't expecting it, but he was just asking if i was ok with the work we were doing. im pretty sensitive to touch. He has never done this to any other girl apart from me. he is slightly touchier than any other teacher, he is also married. but i think he could be doing it for reassurance. maybe he cares, or maybe he has something else on his mind. Does anyone know the reason for his actions? Or perhaps a psychological explanation?

(edited 7 years ago)

Reply 8

CCC75

Original post by meemeekat

i CANNOT get over this time when i was sat working on the desk, and he walked up behind me, put both hands on both sides of my arms. i wasn't expecting it, but he was just asking if i was ok with the work we were doing. im pretty sensitive to touch. He has never done this to any other girl apart from me. he is slightly touchier than any other teacher, he is also married. but i think he could be doing it for reassurance. maybe he cares, or maybe he has something else on his mind. Does anyone know the reason for his actions? Or perhaps a psychological explanation?

You asked and answered your own question. He had empathy for you and felt compelled to offer you time, support and reassurance. That backfired on him.

He has probably referred to his attempt to support you and your reaction in supervision or a team meeting. The response from his colleagues would be unanimously to withdraw and retreat from this pupil for safeguarding reasons.