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How can i get my son to study harder and longer

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Longer and harder doesn't mean better, and I know that as a teenager, the more you talk to him about it, the less he wants to do.

You've highlighted that his revision methods aren't really working so you have to find ones that do work and try to convince him to do it that way, like watching videos, flashcards, that kind of thing, rather than trying to get him to commit extra hours for the sake of it.
Tbh you can't really force him to study. He has to find his own motivation, and then set goals which require him to work hard. If my parents kept pestering me to study I'd be even less likely to do it.
I would also add to be careful what you wish for.... and be very aware of your own competence as a learning mentor.

Getting someone to test you is a pretty good part of a suite of revision strategies - but if the parent you need to be able to let them getting it wrong or not knowing speak for itself. And then when it is close to public examination and you were asked to do the testing, keep your sense of panic about their performance to yourself and hold your breath till August...."You might want to have a look at..." is about as far as you can go

Reading through your post again your concern seems to be more about his current grades and making an assumption from that, and his lack of receptiveness to your suggestions, that he is underperforming for his ability from lack of effort. A chat with his teachers seems a good idea before you do more harm than good.
Original post by geek84
Good Morning Folks

My son is in year 10 at school and will be having end of year exams in a few weeks’ time. He seems to do his homework and a bit of revision every evening, but looking at his recent grades, I am not convinced that he is fully concentrating on revising the material that the teacher has taught.

I have advised him to write down things so that he can remember them for longer. However, he continually insists on just reading the subject material from his exercise books and says he can just as easily remember the material learned this way. I have even suggested to him to learn a topic or paragraph and I will ask him questions regarding the material learned so to that I am convinced that he is understanding the subject. He is totally against that idea and says it is like being back at school. He seems to have an answer for everything, and I don’t know if it is his age or phase he is going through. Most of his grades are usually average or just below average. He seems to get the idea that if he studies harder and gets good grades then I will somehow benefit from the hard work and effort that he has put in. I have tried to explain that getting good grades would eventually help him to get into a good university and increase his prospects of getting a good career/job. However, that type of talk goes in through one ear and out through the other.

Can someone please advise how I go about resolving this problem?

Thank You.


Unfortunately the answer is that you can't make your son study harder and longer.
Your son must realise the importance of hard work and grades and only then will he work hard.
Like many have suggested on here this "reading" method is also useless for me and i don't really learn much from it, but then again whatever works for him.
So this is the bit where you can capitalise on and really see if he's learning properly or not, however he's turned this down and gave a rubbish reason for refusing. If your son is this opposed to that idea(since getting someone else to test him is in my top 5 best ways to revise) i believe your son isn't really learning anything or revising at all.
Of course that's also a sign he's not really doing what he says, you need to investigate further but like others have also said if you push things too far then your plan maybe not have the intended effect. You must ask how you will benefit from him getting good grades. Obviously he's a little deluded and isn't thinking in the right way.
I'm a student in Yr 11 and currently doing my GCSE's (Ooohh a student in the "parent's room" ) and what I do is let my parents take my phone and if I have a revision guide for a certain subject, my laptop as well (I am constantly getting distracted on it). Then I tell them that I can have it back once I have done a certain amount of revision... maybe an hour and a half. But then after only let me have it for like an hour and then take it away again. If you do that then he will be more motivated to revise as he knows there will be a reward soon.

Also for past papers don't let him do it straight after the revision of that subject. For me, I find it best if I revise for a subject in a day and then the next day or so I do the past paper. So you could do that, then if you mark it yourself, so you know that he isn't cheating. Also for me I find it easier to do the hardest subjects first. If you do the harder subjects first then you will be even more motivated as you know the easier subject will come after. I remember last year I made the big mistake of doing the easier subjects first and then having too long breaks and then never getting to the harder subject. For me that was History and so last year I got C's and B's in my mock... But I changed to revising the harder subjects first and in the Jan mock I got A's and A*'s in History.

That's how I revise and make myself work harder and longer but people do work differently (They tell us that and then test us on the same things.... makes sense). I know GCSE's aren't everything but I tell myself that it is so it means I try my hardest to make sure I get the grades I want.

(Also yeah, we always do have an answer to everything)
Reply 25
Original post by Mattyates2000
I'm a student in Yr 11 ...
(Also yeah, we always do have an answer to everything)


Repped you for the last sentence :smile:
Reply 26
At that age just your parent talking to you is annoying (from someone who is just getting out of that phase). A hands off approach is probably best, try and motivate him indirectly. Give him books on the subjects, take him to minimum wage jobs and good long term jobs, but don't be obtuse and pushy about it. If you're pushy, he'll do the opposite, probably so you don't think that method was effective and try it in the future (that's what I'd do).

You need to set the spark for learning really. Apply things to real life whenever you can - easiest with maths and the natural sciences, but try to drop stuff in in conversation.

Forcing him to do work, with the carrot-stick dichotomy, should be the last resort. Even if you think it's the best for him, he won't see it that way. Independence is the holy grail at that time
Have you tried bribes something like if your grades improve I'll pay for your reading festival ticket things like that and a big reward of his GCSE's are good


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Reply 28
Hi Folks

Many thanks indeed for your valuable contributions.
Writing down is extremely important. You can often read and understand and recite from memory but you miss some things out and also the retention time decreases. Explain to him he only needs to write down from his understanding to re-enforce the knowledge he has picked up, but only once and then he has these hand written notes to go back to. Writing down in the form of a poster also helps with visual learning.
Reply 30
Hi Folks

I hope you're all well and once again many thanks for your valuable contributions. I went to my son's school parents evening yesterday. On average he is scoring a grade C to D in all subjects. Naturally, I am a bit disappointed but that doesn't seem to bother him one bit!! After coming from parents evening, he started to play games on his phone which further annoyed me!

His teachers are saying he should take the BTEC route rather than the 'A' level route (perhaps this is because of his limited academic abilities ??). However, he has set his sights on becoming a secondary school teacher. He seems to be quite motivated and focussed in becoming a teacher. But as far as I know, to become a teacher you would need a university degree, and to get on the degree course at university you would need 'A' level subject passes and not BTEC qualifications. Am I correct?

Thank You.
Original post by geek84
Hi Folks

I hope you're all well and once again many thanks for your valuable contributions. I went to my son's school parents evening yesterday. On average he is scoring a grade C to D in all subjects. Naturally, I am a bit disappointed but that doesn't seem to bother him one bit!! After coming from parents evening, he started to play games on his phone which further annoyed me!

His teachers are saying he should take the BTEC route rather than the 'A' level route (perhaps this is because of his limited academic abilities ??). However, he has set his sights on becoming a secondary school teacher. He seems to be quite motivated and focussed in becoming a teacher. But as far as I know, to become a teacher you would need a university degree, and to get on the degree course at university you would need 'A' level subject passes and not BTEC qualifications. Am I correct?

Thank You.


That depends which subject he wants to teach,some degrees he d have no problem doing with a btec.
Reply 32
Thanks for your reply, claireestelle

He want to study for a Bachelor Of Education (B.Ed) degree.
Original post by geek84
Hi Folks

I hope you're all well and once again many thanks for your valuable contributions. I went to my son's school parents evening yesterday. On average he is scoring a grade C to D in all subjects. Naturally, I am a bit disappointed but that doesn't seem to bother him one bit!! After coming from parents evening, he started to play games on his phone which further annoyed me!

His teachers are saying he should take the BTEC route rather than the 'A' level route (perhaps this is because of his limited academic abilities ??). However, he has set his sights on becoming a secondary school teacher. He seems to be quite motivated and focussed in becoming a teacher. But as far as I know, to become a teacher you would need a university degree, and to get on the degree course at university you would need 'A' level subject passes and not BTEC qualifications. Am I correct?

Thank You.


That could be a problem - GCSE requirements for teaching are strict and trip up a lot of potential applicants.

At the moment the requirements are: https://getintoteaching.education.gov.uk/eligibility-for-teacher-training

HOWEVER with the move to grade 1-9 (instead of A*-G) for GCSEs coming in this year it's likely that this requirement will get tougher by the time your son gets on to applying (whether he goes for a BA/BEd Primary with QTS (massively competitive - he'll need work experience to be in with a chance) or a more traditional degree + PGCE route)

https://www.gov.uk/government/uploads/system/uploads/attachment_data/file/537147/Postcard_-_Grading_New_GCSEs.pdf shows the problem - a C grade has been split between a 4 and a 5. It's likely that universities and teacher training regulations will start asking for a 5 grade in more subjects. If your son is currently bordering on a D then that means he's more likely to get 3 or 4 in his GCSEs which would mean he'd have to resit his GCSEs alongside any study in sixth form.
(edited 7 years ago)
Original post by geek84
-.


Maybe studying harder but in shorter bursts would work - just spending hours looking at an open book doesn't mean anything's actually going to stick.

see also
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pomodoro_Technique

Note - the current minimum requirement for becoming a teacher is gcse C grades in maths, english (plus science subject for primary)
Being a secondary school teacher is an oddly vague sort of aspiration given that one teaches a subject or has a specialism of some sort... and given everything else you are saying about him.

Perhaps in terms of your current (or last Summer's) issue, you could ask him how he would support a student who didn't seem to be achieving the levels he needs to pursue his career goals....
Original post by geek84
Good Morning Folks

My son is in year 10 at school and will be having end of year exams in a few weeks’ time. He seems to do his homework and a bit of revision every evening, but looking at his recent grades, I am not convinced that he is fully concentrating on revising the material that the teacher has taught.

I have advised him to write down things so that he can remember them for longer. However, he continually insists on just reading the subject material from his exercise books and says he can just as easily remember the material learned this way. I have even suggested to him to learn a topic or paragraph and I will ask him questions regarding the material learned so to that I am convinced that he is understanding the subject. He is totally against that idea and says it is like being back at school. He seems to have an answer for everything, and I don’t know if it is his age or phase he is going through. Most of his grades are usually average or just below average. He seems to get the idea that if he studies harder and gets good grades then I will somehow benefit from the hard work and effort that he has put in. I have tried to explain that getting good grades would eventually help him to get into a good university and increase his prospects of getting a good career/job. However, that type of talk goes in through one ear and out through the other.

Can someone please advise how I go about resolving this problem?

Thank You.


You can't do anything in this regard really: he has to want to study and want to get good grades. Year 10 is only GCSE's and from what I've heard they're easy enough if you study which he is already doing anyway. I'm sure his work rate will improve as he gets closer to exam time. Don't push him, you'll only demotivate him.


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(edited 7 years ago)
Reply 37
Hi Folks

Once again, many thanks for your valuable contributions.
Reply 38
Original post by geek84
Hi Folks

I hope you're all well and once again many thanks for your valuable contributions. I went to my son's school parents evening yesterday. On average he is scoring a grade C to D in all subjects. Naturally, I am a bit disappointed but that doesn't seem to bother him one bit!! After coming from parents evening, he started to play games on his phone which further annoyed me!

His teachers are saying he should take the BTEC route rather than the 'A' level route (perhaps this is because of his limited academic abilities ??). However, he has set his sights on becoming a secondary school teacher. He seems to be quite motivated and focussed in becoming a teacher. But as far as I know, to become a teacher you would need a university degree, and to get on the degree course at university you would need 'A' level subject passes and not BTEC qualifications. Am I correct?

Thank You.

95% of UK universities accept BTEC as an A level equivalent

I did one myself and am now in my third year, I study
Computer Science and not Education, although I knew someone who did Education after their BTEC which I believe was in Applied Science
All he really needs to worry about is 5 A*-C's anything past that is a bonus in year 11 gently suggest that some timed practice questions might help also get him to look through some of the past papers I found at uni that questions in my exams were often reworked questions from past years in one case I had been doing a couple of past papers the day before and a question was lifted directly from the paper I had been working from the day before which was nice.

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