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I want to live at home during Uni-is it a bad idea?

I have always been a 'home bird'-I like to stay close to home with my parents/dogs/siblings etc, so I am considering living at home during Uni. The primary reason is that I have a feeling I'll be really, really homesick if I lived in halls. So I was wondering if any of you guys commute? If so, could you tell me what it's like-do you have lots of friends/do you regret it/what are the pros and cons? Thank you!

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Reply 1

999tigger

Plenty of people commute, although the downside imo is you dont get the full uni experience which for me would be libing away from home. You do get to save yourself a lot of money though. The main danger I think is that you need to pay more attention to making a social network if thats what you want as halls or shared accommodation can be a rich source of making friends. Thats because you spend a lot more time with people and that develops into friendships. If you commute then you need to pit more effort into making friends by joining societies and socialising on campus becayse you dont have halls ot student accommodation to fall back on.

Reply 2

super_kawaii

Original post by flowerlu

You will miss out a lot. It'll prove a lot harder for you to make friends as you won't have the ready made group of your flatmates, and it'll be harder for you to go to impromptu events that are so common at uni, such as parties or days out. How will you get back after events or societies?

Also, you're going to have to move out at some point, and uni's the perfect opportunity to do so, as you get all the independence, but there's still so much support available if you get homesickness.

I've suffered from severe homesickness before when I lived abroad and was banned by my family from leaving the country I was in, so I know how it feels. You just have to get involved with as much as possible so you don't think about home, and it'll be easier to do so if you live out

Is saving a bit of money really worth missing out on an essential part of uni life? The social and extracurricular side of uni is just as important as the academic side-for graduate jobs, your final grade is nothing but a tick in a box. They expect to see a wide variety of extra curricular activities and responsibilities to prove you fit the person spec. I know this, because I've just landed myself a graduate job

(edited 7 years ago)

Reply 3

jonathanemptage

Original post by flowerlu

Before I answer how long would your commute be?

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Reply 4

FrenchUnicorn

Why would it be a bad idea ? You should do whatever makes you feel good :yep:

Also that is a funny thing about UK/USA , students who usually go to an other city far from home to study. In France students usually don't leave home until 3/4 years of uni

Reply 5

Drewski

A huge part of university is personal development. You'll miss out on 99% of that if you're living at home, putting you a long way behind your peers.

Reply 6

Proxenus

You'd be missing out. Its harder to go out with mates on nights out. Miss out on precious bonding with flat mates which could be your life long mates. miss out on being independent.

Reply 7

super_kawaii

Original post by Drewski

A huge part of university is personal development. You'll miss out on 99% of that if you're living at home, putting you a long way behind your peers.

Original post by Proxenus

You'd be missing out. Its harder to go out with mates on nights out. Miss out on precious bonding with flat mates which could be your life long mates. miss out on being independent.

This. People underestimate how important the personal development that comes with moving away from the parental home is

Reply 8

flowerlu

Original post by jonathanemptage

Before I answer how long would your commute be?

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Only about a 25 minute bus journey :smile:

Reply 9

super_kawaii

Original post by flowerlu

Only about a 25 minute bus journey :smile:

It's still worth moving out. The social side of university is half of the whole experience and the vast majority of people have exactly the same worries as you and end up not just coping but absolutely thriving! Worrying about being homesick is totally normal, and the only way you're going to deal with it is by moving out and just getting 100% involved with uni. I know it's tough, but the vast majority cope incredibly well

Reply 10

Blank_Planet

I wouldn't agree with most of the people here, living in halls is advertised as "the best part of uni experience", but you are not guaranteed to end up in a flat of sociable people. My flat largely consisted of really quiet and boring people with whom I could hard hold a conversation (with a few exceptions) and I made most friends with course mates. Plus there are clubs and societies to make friends!

That being said, its good to move out to learn independence. Cooking, laundry and managing your budget is a hassle, but you'll have to learn it at some point, unless you wanna rely on your mum until you're 30 and find a wife :s-smilie:

Reply 11

MedicZd

I lived at home but I think I always slightly regretted it. I felt a bit isolated and away from everyone else and it always required that extra effort to be included in things or trying to get onto campus for events and stuff. I saved a lot and it made the transition easier but when uni finishes I'm still here at home. Nothing's changed that much
I would at least try it for it the first year and see if you like it, because you can always come back home. It's an experience and a gamble but you just have to make the best of it

Reply 12

super_kawaii

Original post by Blank_Planet

I agree, flatmates aren't guaranteed to be your best friends-I'm not close to mine anymore. However, they can act as a first set of friends you can go to things with, and prevent the nervousness of going to things all by yourself, which is more likely to be the case if you're a commuter.

Staying at home can make social things more difficult though, there's no denying this. A lot of events happen in the evening, once classes have finished. What if events happen after the last bus home? Will you really want to cash out a load for a taxi back or get your parents come pick you up? If you're living in halls, it'll make life a lot easier and cheaper as halls will be a lot closer to all the places events will happen, and you can easily share a taxi with people living in the same area-something you'll totally miss out on living at home.

Most of my time at uni has been spent with course mates and society friends and living out with them has proved so worth it. I've developed countless life skills which I'll need in the future. I've also made so many good friends by living in halls-it's a shared experience that you can share with people and will help you bond with them.

I'd definitely move out

Reply 13

Paigemc

i think if your young and still living with parents moving out and staying in student accommodation is the way to go.. your not going to want to live with your parents forever and if you get homesick, sorry to say but your going to have to get over it sooner or later. Starting uni is the perfect place to do that as you have so many people in your exact situation. You can always visit home.

Reply 14

jonathanemptage

Original post by flowerlu

Only about a 25 minute bus journey :smile:

That's not too bad... but it will impact your life at uni there are a couple of questions to consider here .

1) How social do you want to be if you want to be really social make loads of friends go to clubs and the socials connected to said clubs have the pre gaming and unplanned nights out and more then live out.

I promise you living out will seriously impair your social life no 2 ways about it.

2) How much money will you save really you'll get less loan so it's more than just I can spend more loan because I have no rent particularly if your parents are going to charge you rent.

3) What will you do if you have long (more than four hours) breaks sure you can study for a bit but over 4 hours is a big ask every day.

4) Group work will be really hard and although those 25 mins at the end and start of the day isn't too bad travelling is a pain and tiring particularly in the middle of winter also your group might get pissed off with you if your late or leavening work sessions early to catch the bus home.

Finally it's nice to have a place to retreat to that isn't a bus ride away.

(London of course is a completely different beast )

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Reply 15

Blank_Planet

Original post by jonathanemptage

(London of course is a completely different beast )

Oh, I guess I should have mentioned that I study at a London uni and it took a 30min tube ride for me to get to the campus.

You can spend your first year in halls and move back later, this way you won't miss out as a fresher. Dunno what the rules are at your uni, but mine kicks us out of our halls after 1 year anyway.

Reply 16

loveleest

I personally couldn't do it tbh. I think one of the steps in uni is to learn how to be independent and stop relying on your parents. I think it's a good opportunity for me to get some space and to learn about myself more. And also I won't have to get a million phone calls when I am out with my friends.
It depends though, my friend is staying at home because she is staying in London so she thinks it's pointless to live in halls and waste money- Everyone sees things differently. However I just think halls is going to be a much better option...Especially in terms of social life.

Reply 17

JustGeorgeJ

Original post by flowerlu

Hello,

I wouldn't say it's a bad idea at all. It's each to their own and whatever makes you feel comfortable - I'd definitely suggest looking into all the accommodation and hall options and everything before making your mind up but at the end of the day, it's whatever you feel comfortable with.

Now, I didn't commute to university. I lived an hour away so I lived in halls during my first year and a student house in my second. I'm very much a home bird so this was difficult for me however, I knew I needed to experience having independence. It wasn't easy but it was a challenge and just what I needed.
However, one of my best friends commuted and her experience was fairly positive. She made friends through her course and through us online and she attended events and parties and what not because she drove and never really missed out of much - apart from the experience of living in halls. The drive for her was around half an hour and she said sometimes she couldn't be bothered, or was too tired, or it was costly using petrol everyday and so on and so fourth but it was never something she majorly regretted - just a time she'd wished she'd done differently if that makes sense?

Just ensure you explore all options first before you settle on any decision!

Hope you manage to sort it all out soon!

Reply 18

lizmoo0721

Original post by flowerlu

Hiya, I commuted first year and it was honestly the worst decision I've ever made. Part of university is definitely moving out and gaining that independence. You will have no social life, won't be able to make full use of the facilities and societies, and it was quite embarrassing leaving things early to catch the train home before they get too quiet. You can always go home at the weekends if it isn't too far.

Reply 19

jonathanemptage

Original post by Blank_Planet

London is more expensive (you do get more loan though) than most places and as such many students commute that coupled with the 24 hour tube and night busses mean you might not miss as much. But you'll still miss a bit halls is better.

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