Confused, lost, Muslim Girl, all help and advise would be good
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Sister, no need to point out the obvious, but the guy is using you. Even worse is the fact that he's using religion as a playing card- between you and himself. For the sake of your own health and time, let this guy go. May Allah guide you, and make the situation easier for you. May Allah have mercy on us all to show us the right way. Ameen.
Are you really a Muslim? As in, do you genuinely believe in and care about your religion?
Original post by MrsSheldonCooper
That's honestly so sad. Something similar happened with one of my cousins too :/
I'd say break away from your religion and your family. Your mother doesn't sound very supportive at all. And don't sleep with your ex again. If he truly cares for you, see what he does to the one he's dating. If he carries on dating as if nothing happened, he isn't worth it.
I'd say break away from your religion and your family. Your mother doesn't sound very supportive at all. And don't sleep with your ex again. If he truly cares for you, see what he does to the one he's dating. If he carries on dating as if nothing happened, he isn't worth it.
What are you talking about AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
Original post by Serine Soul
The way I see it, if two people are truly meant to be together, absolutely nothing can stop them. Take of that what you will
You could try distancing yourself from your family first, marry and settle with him, then work back towards coming to good terms with your family. I suppose when it's all died down a bit and they see you're happy, they'll accept it.
This ^^^
How could you do that though?
You could try distancing yourself from your family first, marry and settle with him, then work back towards coming to good terms with your family. I suppose when it's all died down a bit and they see you're happy, they'll accept it.
This ^^^
How could you do that though?
Didnt you read it happened secretly so it happened without either of them knowing
i feel like OP is not getting to help or advice she so desperately needs on this thread, she is just being judged :/
Original post by ThunderStormzy
Didnt you read it happened secretly so it happened without either of them knowing
That doesn't make it okay though
Fair enough I do often go by the line 'what they don't know won't hurt them' but I couldn't do that in a relationship
Original post by PrincessBO$$
i feel like OP is not getting to help or advice she so desperately needs on this thread, she is just being judged :/
She was wrong to cheat, but we are wrong to judge her. It's unimaginable what she's been through.
What a mess
I know it will be hard but distance yourself from your religion, What kind of god would be happy for someone to be miserable and not to love someone they love.
Go for it but make sure you love him and be prepared for your parents/community to possibly shun you, but once you are out everything will be better
Go for it but make sure you love him and be prepared for your parents/community to possibly shun you, but once you are out everything will be better
How disappointing. You should be extremely ashamed of yourself.
Now pick what's important to you and follow that path. And fix your whorish ways.
Now pick what's important to you and follow that path. And fix your whorish ways.
Original post by Anonymous
Hi everyone
I'm at an all time low right now and seeking some help and advise to get through this.
I would like to remain anonymous for now, I'm just worried I may know someone on here so need to protect my identity.
Okay here is my story
8 years ago I starting dating a none Muslim guy, I was 17 at the time and he was 21. We dated for 5 years and got so strong. He was my first true love. I dated other men before (Muslim ones and hated it) where as with this guy, I loved him (still do)
Anyways he knew what my family were like, I used to lie all the time to my family, stay at his house everyday and come home at 11, it's like I lived my 5 years with him as a lie to my family.
One day my mother found out, she was hatred towards me, very bitter, told me to forget him and find a Muslim. She cursed him all the time, she hated it. My brothers eventually found out and then 5 years later in the relationship I ended it. During the 4th year dating he did start at looking to convert but it started to get complicated and was questioning things in the religion. It was in the 5th year he said to me he cant do it. He doesn't want to be Muslim. He wants to be accepted for who he is. Then I decided to end things. I was a mess and then 1 year passed and I heard he was dating again. My heart was in pieces. I couldn't breathe when I found out. Total knife in my heart. I started dating to help keep me distracted. I was a mess and yes I dated a none Muslim again to try heal me.
Anyways 2 years have now passed and this month (3weeks ago) I got a message from my ex. It was a song that said he will never forget me.
We exchange emails and caught up! It was nice to hear from him. He is doing so well in his life, owns a Lamborghini, is a business owner and so successful (all happened after we broke up)
He is still in his relationship and so am I.
A few days ago we decided to meet up secretly. One thing lead to another and flame was reignited. We slept with each other, it felt comfortable. But then a few days later we both regretted it as we are both in relationships.
I know what we done was bad, but we both still love each other. It was because I stopped loving him we broke. We stopped because of religion.
Now we Both are confused and we have spoken and agreed that this can be no more. He said we won't work at all, he doesn't want to be a Muslim and he doesn't want my family to disown me. He told me I need to find the right man.
So now I'm here, crying, hating the fact it was my religion that made us not be together.
If religion wasn't a part of it then we would be married by now, had kids and a lovely house.
What do I do?
Family: so mum has been to haaj and has become very religious, she's very culture orientated. She tells me tirelessly that I'm getting old '26 and I need to get married and settle down with a Muslim. My brothers are strong believers too.
What do I do?
Has anyone been in the situation
I'm at an all time low right now and seeking some help and advise to get through this.
I would like to remain anonymous for now, I'm just worried I may know someone on here so need to protect my identity.
Okay here is my story
8 years ago I starting dating a none Muslim guy, I was 17 at the time and he was 21. We dated for 5 years and got so strong. He was my first true love. I dated other men before (Muslim ones and hated it) where as with this guy, I loved him (still do)
Anyways he knew what my family were like, I used to lie all the time to my family, stay at his house everyday and come home at 11, it's like I lived my 5 years with him as a lie to my family.
One day my mother found out, she was hatred towards me, very bitter, told me to forget him and find a Muslim. She cursed him all the time, she hated it. My brothers eventually found out and then 5 years later in the relationship I ended it. During the 4th year dating he did start at looking to convert but it started to get complicated and was questioning things in the religion. It was in the 5th year he said to me he cant do it. He doesn't want to be Muslim. He wants to be accepted for who he is. Then I decided to end things. I was a mess and then 1 year passed and I heard he was dating again. My heart was in pieces. I couldn't breathe when I found out. Total knife in my heart. I started dating to help keep me distracted. I was a mess and yes I dated a none Muslim again to try heal me.
Anyways 2 years have now passed and this month (3weeks ago) I got a message from my ex. It was a song that said he will never forget me.
We exchange emails and caught up! It was nice to hear from him. He is doing so well in his life, owns a Lamborghini, is a business owner and so successful (all happened after we broke up)
He is still in his relationship and so am I.
A few days ago we decided to meet up secretly. One thing lead to another and flame was reignited. We slept with each other, it felt comfortable. But then a few days later we both regretted it as we are both in relationships.
I know what we done was bad, but we both still love each other. It was because I stopped loving him we broke. We stopped because of religion.
Now we Both are confused and we have spoken and agreed that this can be no more. He said we won't work at all, he doesn't want to be a Muslim and he doesn't want my family to disown me. He told me I need to find the right man.
So now I'm here, crying, hating the fact it was my religion that made us not be together.
If religion wasn't a part of it then we would be married by now, had kids and a lovely house.
What do I do?
Family: so mum has been to haaj and has become very religious, she's very culture orientated. She tells me tirelessly that I'm getting old '26 and I need to get married and settle down with a Muslim. My brothers are strong believers too.
What do I do?
Has anyone been in the situation
thats what youre parents were scared of, it causes real emotional agony, look up Nouman Ali khan on this, Dating a non muslim is a problem because if you ever want to have children they have certain rights over you, one of them is to pick a good spouse, now if he slept with you whilst in another relationship should that not make you question? May Allah forgive you, Again, i strongly recommend Nouman Ali Khan, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jv1qpxY-_AA
And there you have it ladies and gents the real issues of the 21st century.
If you're genuinely a Muslim and believe in Allah then I suggest you turn to him and repent, for God is most forgiving and merciful. Seek help through patience and prayer, things will get better.
Attachment not found
Original post by Anonymous
If you're genuinely a Muslim and believe in Allah then I suggest you turn to him and repent, for God is most forgiving and merciful. Seek help through patience and prayer, things will get better.
Attachment not found
Agree with this. Sister, the guys playing with you. Turn to Allah, and fill your void with your relationship with Allah, and all else should fall into place.
Original post by junayd1998
And there you have it ladies and gents the real issues of the 21st century.
Original post by hamza772000
Great advice brother
Aint giving advice to this troll **** lmao.
Original post by junayd1998
Aint giving advice to this troll **** lmao.
but if it isn't it's kinda sad tbh 
but it's not as if people on tsr can offer much help apart from either trolling or judging, so again 
Original post by Anonymous
Hi everyone
I'm at an all time low right now and seeking some help and advise to get through this.
I would like to remain anonymous for now, I'm just worried I may know someone on here so need to protect my identity.
Okay here is my story
8 years ago I starting dating a none Muslim guy, I was 17 at the time and he was 21. We dated for 5 years and got so strong. He was my first true love. I dated other men before (Muslim ones and hated it) where as with this guy, I loved him (still do)
Anyways he knew what my family were like, I used to lie all the time to my family, stay at his house everyday and come home at 11, it's like I lived my 5 years with him as a lie to my family.
One day my mother found out, she was hatred towards me, very bitter, told me to forget him and find a Muslim. She cursed him all the time, she hated it. My brothers eventually found out and then 5 years later in the relationship I ended it. During the 4th year dating he did start at looking to convert but it started to get complicated and was questioning things in the religion. It was in the 5th year he said to me he cant do it. He doesn't want to be Muslim. He wants to be accepted for who he is. Then I decided to end things. I was a mess and then 1 year passed and I heard he was dating again. My heart was in pieces. I couldn't breathe when I found out. Total knife in my heart. I started dating to help keep me distracted. I was a mess and yes I dated a none Muslim again to try heal me.
Anyways 2 years have now passed and this month (3weeks ago) I got a message from my ex. It was a song that said he will never forget me.
We exchange emails and caught up! It was nice to hear from him. He is doing so well in his life, owns a Lamborghini, is a business owner and so successful (all happened after we broke up)
He is still in his relationship and so am I.
A few days ago we decided to meet up secretly. One thing lead to another and flame was reignited. We slept with each other, it felt comfortable. But then a few days later we both regretted it as we are both in relationships.
I know what we done was bad, but we both still love each other. It was because I stopped loving him we broke. We stopped because of religion.
Now we Both are confused and we have spoken and agreed that this can be no more. He said we won't work at all, he doesn't want to be a Muslim and he doesn't want my family to disown me. He told me I need to find the right man.
So now I'm here, crying, hating the fact it was my religion that made us not be together.
If religion wasn't a part of it then we would be married by now, had kids and a lovely house.
What do I do?
Family: so mum has been to haaj and has become very religious, she's very culture orientated. She tells me tirelessly that I'm getting old '26 and I need to get married and settle down with a Muslim. My brothers are strong believers too.
What do I do?
Has anyone been in the situation
I'm at an all time low right now and seeking some help and advise to get through this.
I would like to remain anonymous for now, I'm just worried I may know someone on here so need to protect my identity.
Okay here is my story
8 years ago I starting dating a none Muslim guy, I was 17 at the time and he was 21. We dated for 5 years and got so strong. He was my first true love. I dated other men before (Muslim ones and hated it) where as with this guy, I loved him (still do)
Anyways he knew what my family were like, I used to lie all the time to my family, stay at his house everyday and come home at 11, it's like I lived my 5 years with him as a lie to my family.
One day my mother found out, she was hatred towards me, very bitter, told me to forget him and find a Muslim. She cursed him all the time, she hated it. My brothers eventually found out and then 5 years later in the relationship I ended it. During the 4th year dating he did start at looking to convert but it started to get complicated and was questioning things in the religion. It was in the 5th year he said to me he cant do it. He doesn't want to be Muslim. He wants to be accepted for who he is. Then I decided to end things. I was a mess and then 1 year passed and I heard he was dating again. My heart was in pieces. I couldn't breathe when I found out. Total knife in my heart. I started dating to help keep me distracted. I was a mess and yes I dated a none Muslim again to try heal me.
Anyways 2 years have now passed and this month (3weeks ago) I got a message from my ex. It was a song that said he will never forget me.
We exchange emails and caught up! It was nice to hear from him. He is doing so well in his life, owns a Lamborghini, is a business owner and so successful (all happened after we broke up)
He is still in his relationship and so am I.
A few days ago we decided to meet up secretly. One thing lead to another and flame was reignited. We slept with each other, it felt comfortable. But then a few days later we both regretted it as we are both in relationships.
I know what we done was bad, but we both still love each other. It was because I stopped loving him we broke. We stopped because of religion.
Now we Both are confused and we have spoken and agreed that this can be no more. He said we won't work at all, he doesn't want to be a Muslim and he doesn't want my family to disown me. He told me I need to find the right man.
So now I'm here, crying, hating the fact it was my religion that made us not be together.
If religion wasn't a part of it then we would be married by now, had kids and a lovely house.
What do I do?
Family: so mum has been to haaj and has become very religious, she's very culture orientated. She tells me tirelessly that I'm getting old '26 and I need to get married and settle down with a Muslim. My brothers are strong believers too.
What do I do?
Has anyone been in the situation
Run away from home and be with him. It's fine if they disown you
Posted from TSR Mobile
Original post by hamza772000
Haha, I agree if it's true but if it isn't it's kinda sad tbh but it's not as if people on tsr can offer much help apart from either trolling or judging, so again
but if it isn't it's kinda sad tbh but it's not as if people on tsr can offer much help apart from either trolling or judging, so again ight since your a big boy now mabey you should give some advice.
I'm gonna be completely honest here...
Why on Earth did you give up someone who was willing to accept you for who you were? I understand your family didn't think highly of your relationship, but as you said, you are 26, and I reckon you shouldn't have their interference in your life anymore. It should be mind over mother (no pun intended) for you, my friend. I wouldn't be able to understand how complex the situation is, I'm just throwing out a suggestion here. I understand if it isn't the best, though. Good luck in resolving your problem.
Why on Earth did you give up someone who was willing to accept you for who you were? I understand your family didn't think highly of your relationship, but as you said, you are 26, and I reckon you shouldn't have their interference in your life anymore. It should be mind over mother (no pun intended) for you, my friend. I wouldn't be able to understand how complex the situation is, I'm just throwing out a suggestion here. I understand if it isn't the best, though. Good luck in resolving your problem.
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