The Student Room Group

Mum wants to stay in halls first night of freshers?!!

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Original post by Carnationlilyrose
No, I'm far too old and sad for that.


Uno I can make you feel young and happy again.
Hahahaha this whole thread is peak TSR

OP don't let your mam stay, you will be mocked


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Original post by Dr.Snake
Uno I can make you feel young and happy again.


I think there are plenty of better targets for your flirting!
Original post by katherine9609
Will do once I'm at uni :smile:


lol enjoy making no friends then. Why not take it further? Let her inconvenience your flatmates even more by inviting her once per day. Sounds like a fantastic idea.
(edited 7 years ago)
Original post by katherine9609
Bless your mind set :smile:
You're one of those people who forget they ever had parents the moment you move out


Lol when you go uni you're one of dem people who brings there mom to their class. lol
Original post by Dr.Snake
Lol when you go uni you're one of dem people who brings there mom to their class. lol


Who does that 😂
Reply 66
Original post by s4ffy
I did! She seemed shocked that I'm so against it and she said she couldn't understand why it was such a big deal. She also said loads of parents do it... which I don't believe. I feel like a terrible daughter but it's really not how I want to do it.


No, loads of parents don't do it. I know of none that have done. I really don't recommend it.
Original post by Carnationlilyrose
No, I'm far too old and sad for that.


Never too old to loosen up your inhibitions and have some fun :wink: I've been out with older women and have gladly witnessed their liberation.
And oh English, got any novels to recommend for me? I like realistic dramas. :smile: Like Trainspotting, so cool.
Reply 68
I really don't understand the mindset of some people. No offence to your mum but how can she think what she's asking is reasonable? It sounds like a scene from the inbetweeners...
It just seems out of touch to not get it.
Just spoon your mum OP. I bet she makes moaning noises when she moves in her sleep doesn't she?
Or get her involved with everyone else, maybe play never have i ever. You might be surprised how often she drinks :wink:
All depends how well you get on with your mum.

A hotel would be much better and it would be embarrassing if the other freshers knew. Guess you will have to ignore it and get a takeaway or find someone elses room to sleep in..... What Carnation said @#20 is spot on.

You could always work and pay for a hotel room for her. She might not appreciate how odd it could look. She might realise once she gets to hall.
Original post by katherine9609
Uni = 3 years. Mother over to see how's living alone going etc. = 1 day. Don't see anything wrong with that.

Pretty sure the friends I will make will not be judgmental like you are 😌 Might as well delete my mums number and pretend she never existed according to your mind set because having any contact will = having no friends lmao


If you're weird enough to bring your mum to freaking freshers week then you probably won't be making many friends in the first place.


And your reasoning is ridiculous too. I should listen to an opinion because she's my mother? My mother spews dodgy opinions weekly. No one is always correct. As everyone here but you realizes, OP's mother is in the wrong.

Just don't interfere with your childs business for that 1 week. If you want to talk more, do it on the phone. Plus you're not even allowed to do what the mother is suggesting. So the entire argument is moot. She should stay at home or book a hotel.
Reply 72
Just be honest and tell her that you would prefer that she stayed in a hotel. I also think it might be a bit awkward for your flatmates if your mum stayed over, I personally would think it was a bit odd. My mum implied a few months ago that she wanted to visit and stay with me in halls, I told her straight away, no. I explained it's uncommon for parents to stay in halls with students but she could stay in a hotel if would like for a couple days instead.

I think during freshers week you should try to avoid visiting parents etc. Use that time to settle in and get to know other students and all that jazz.
(edited 7 years ago)
no no no no no. It mustn't happen. Your cred will not even have a chance to climb above zero. She was young once and must have an idea that this is soooo uncool. She will stifle the flat / halls or whatever with her presence, she will make you look like a mummy's girl and she will hang with you whether you like it or not. When everybody is off their faces after the pub crawl and you are all toasting eggs and burning the tea, will she just stay in your room? Nope. She will come out and mother you all, calling you 'princess' or 'dear'.

She should get a hotel room and stay away, but suggest it nicely: she will be in no fit state to drive home the next day if she stays with you, trust me. It sounds harsh but it's important to you and she must be able to see that first impressions last.

Obviously, there is a potential alternative issue here: she wants to get hammered and bang all your flat mates .
OP you only get 1 first night of freshers! When my mum came to help me move in she literally stayed around for an hour whilst we got coffee from a uni outlet and then left so she wouldn't get home late. Just make sure you arrive early enough for her to be able to get home before it's unreasonably late.
:laugh:

I can't imagine what I would have said to my parents in this situation because they would never have tried something so mad. Jesus H. Christ.
Ask if there is a guest room for her.

If not, just say no because you cannot get to sleep at the moment without watching four episodes of Versailles at top volume.
It's become a routine, and you would be embarrassed in front of her.
Ok so while there are a lot of 'I think' posts in this thread, there's not a lot of 'try this.'

So. Firstly you should call uni/your halls and ask whether guests are allowed to stay for a night. If it's a no, then you have your answer. 'Sorry mum, I tried...'

If it's a yes, have a mature chat with her about how you feel. This is your first night to bond with flatmates and get a feel for uni life. As much as you love her, you don't think it's appropriate to stay together on your first night and your flatmates more than likely wont appreciate it either. Tell her you appreciate everything she's doing to help and you understand asking to get a hotel is inconvenient for her, but you would really appreciate if she took up your offer of staying elsewhere. Suggest you meet for brunch before she leaves so you can say proper goodbyes and wish her a safe journey.

If she's still insistent you'll need to be a bit firmer. 'No mum, this is a big event for me and I want to do this on my own. I know you want to stay together but I feel that it could really impact my first few days settling in to uni life. It's like going to your first day at school and having your mum sit next to you at your desk.'

Hopefully being honest about how you feel (don't say you'll be embarrassed or you'll be made fun of) she'll realise what this means to you. If not, well, then it's incredibly selfish of her and you'll have to decide whether to let her 'win' or have a fall out. It might mean you travelling up on your own though...
(edited 7 years ago)
Reply 78
so much rep
(edited 7 years ago)
Just goes to show the age (i.e maturity) of the posters here and I mean that in a non offensive way.

If you are that worried make your own way there or pay your mums hotel room if not the petrol costs as else it means you only care about yourself.

Or maybe try and get the accomodation to let you move in a day early so that way she can spend the night with you and not have flatmates around.

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