The Student Room Group
Voting for TSRs Ultimate Study Playlist is NOW OPEN >>
<a https://www.thestudentroom.co.uk/showthread.php?t=7467335'> Year 12s: what will be the first way you research your future options? >>
Voting for TSRs Ultimate Study Playlist is NOW OPEN >>
<a https://www.thestudentroom.co.uk/showthread.php?t=7467335'> Year 12s: what will be the first way you research your future options? >>

Not everyone going to uni has a supportive family

Just wanted to make a forum/post to people like me, who may be looking at forums and advice documents where it just assumes that your parents are 100% behind you.
You're not alone in not having parents who won't give you a penny towards your studies/living and who didn't ask how any of your exams went.
It can be difficult seeing "and you'll visit for Christmas" because I know that I won't and others may be in the same position too.

Hey guys! Please make yourself known, because I am sure that I am not alone

Scroll to see replies

never found a thread so relevant:'(
Reply 2
Avatar for cpaige21
cpaige21
9
I don't think my parents will be quite as bad as you put it but they definitely will not be supporting me financially. I get the least student finance and it only just covers my accommodation so I can see us falling out at some point during university over money.
Reply 3
Avatar for 97Y
97Y
OP
11
Original post by Justmoll28
never found a thread so relevant:'(


I just never found one I could relate with so I decided to post!
I tell myself that it'll get better because I'll do well for myself, hopefully, one day
Reply 4
Avatar for 97Y
97Y
OP
11
Original post by cpaige21
I don't think my parents will be quite as bad as you put it but they definitely will not be supporting me financially. I get the least student finance and it only just covers my accommodation so I can see us falling out at some point during university over money.


Falling out over money.. Do it every week and it's Hell, makes me very bitter. I suppose it's worse if you know that they can but simply won't
Was speaking about an accommodation prepayment with my mum recently which is 550 quid and she said she couldn't help but is currently planning on buying a new kitchen!!
Reply 6
Avatar for 97Y
97Y
OP
11
Original post by somevirtualguy
Was speaking about an accommodation prepayment with my mum recently which is 550 quid and she said she couldn't help but is currently planning on buying a new kitchen!!


Things like this.. It's dramatic to say (but very true to me) that I feel betrayed everytime things like this come up. Like.. Why can't you help me with a small thing and I'm sure I can repay the favour in the future
Original post by 97Y
Things like this.. It's dramatic to say (but very true to me) that I feel betrayed everytime things like this come up. Like.. Why can't you help me with a small thing and I'm sure I can repay the favour in the future


Luckily I can pay it because I've got a part time job but God help me if I didn't...
Original post by 97Y
Things like this.. It's dramatic to say (but very true to me) that I feel betrayed everytime things like this come up. Like.. Why can't you help me with a small thing and I'm sure I can repay the favour in the future


Because your parents are entitled to decide what they want to spend their own money on?
Original post by 97Y
Just wanted to make a forum/post to people like me, who may be looking at forums and advice documents where it just assumes that your parents are 100% behind you.
You're not alone in not having parents who won't give you a penny towards your studies/living and who didn't ask how any of your exams went.
It can be difficult seeing "and you'll visit for Christmas" because I know that I won't and others may be in the same position too.

Hey guys! Please make yourself known, because I am sure that I am not alone


I know it seems hard but you are not alone and I have to support myself financially as well.
The current system punishes students for their parents actions which is very sad

I'm glad i had a very supportive family though you guys have my sympathy.
"Get a job you scroungey lil slugs" - Paul Chowdhury :wink:. Seriously though, my parents aren't supporting me financially so I'm trying to transfer my job over to the area where my uni is.
(edited 7 years ago)
Reply 12
Avatar for tg1998
tg1998
10
I'd take a gap year and do a job which is relevant to the course you want to take (atleast they will look at that favourably). Sadly some unis don't get that parents won't help so working at McDonald's may not do any favours.

I'm lucky, my parents will support me but hopefully I won't need the safety net as I will get the full maintenance loan of £8.2k and a grant because we have no income as both my parents have retired. Basically I will have £2.8k to survive on wherever I go which is easy as I will get a job in the second year to top it up (and rent is cheaper in the private sector for where I'm going).
Reply 13
Avatar for 97Y
97Y
OP
11
Original post by Anonymous
I know it seems hard but you are not alone and I have to support myself financially as well.


I work in fast food which pays oddly well, so all is well on that front it would just be nice to worry about exams instead of an 8 hour night shift you know. This is when others really do have an upper hand. Welcome to life, I guess 😅
What do study and where do you work?
Reply 14
Avatar for 97Y
97Y
OP
11
Original post by tg1998
I'd take a gap year and do a job which is relevant to the course you want to take (atleast they will look at that favourably). Sadly some unis don't get that parents won't help so working at McDonald's may not do any favours.

I'm lucky, my parents will support me but hopefully I won't need the safety net as I will get the full maintenance loan of £8.2k and a grant because we have no income as both my parents have retired. Basically I will have £2.8k to survive on wherever I go which is easy as I will get a job in the second year to top it up (and rent is cheaper in the private sector for where I'm going).


I need to move out I'm afraid and want to start studying this year, so no gap year but I'm renting private too!! Halls.. More expensive and more of a hassle and when I come back from work at 1am I want to sleep in silence you know. Why only 2.8K?
Lucky I live in Scotland so I don't have to pay for anything financially towards university tuitions, however, my mum doesnt like the degree course that I want to do at all as she wanted me to do a course that I didn't really see myself doing. It can be quite hard because I just want her to be happy but I don't think she wont be. However, I'm doing this degree for myself and nobody else, as much as I want my mum to be happy I have to think about my own happiness too. It sucks.
(edited 7 years ago)
Original post by Hamo2509
Because your parents are entitled to decide what they want to spend their own money on?


Nobody says they're not. However, that does not mean that it isn't selfish for family not to help one another if they can, not unless they have a very bad relationship. I used to wonder how children could put their parents in retirement homes and leave them to grow old lonely, perhaps these are the sort of parents who end up there.
Reply 17
Avatar for 97Y
97Y
OP
11
Original post by sameehaiqbal
Lucky I live in Scotland so I don't have to pay for anything financially towards university tuitions, however, my mum don't like the degree course that I want to do at all as they wanted me to do something else. It can be quite hard because I just want her to be happy but I don't think she wont be. However, I'm doing this degree for myself and nobody else, as much as I want my mum to be happy I have to think about my own happiness too. It sucks.


A lot of my friends have to deal with this. Forcing them into 'respected' degrees because their parents didn't achieve what they want to. I always tell them that it's their life and they are the only people who can choose their path because when you look back when you're 80 it's best to have lived for you. No one else
Reply 18
Avatar for 97Y
97Y
OP
11
Original post by WBZ144
Nobody says they're not. However, that does not mean that it isn't selfish for family not to help one another if they can, not unless they have a very bad relationship. I used to wonder how children could put their parents in retirement homes and leave them to grow old lonely, perhaps these are the sort of parents who end up there.


They say you 'reap what you sow' and if someone has the ability to help either emotionally and/or financially but they refuse based on principle.. Then you're now sewing something good.
Original post by 97Y
A lot of my friends have to deal with this. Forcing them into 'respected' degrees because their parents didn't achieve what they want to. I always tell them that it's their life and they are the only people who can choose their path because when you look back when you're 80 it's best to have lived for you. No one else


Yes. My mum wanted me to go into Accountancy but my maths isn't very good at all and I just hate the subject altogether. Halfway through I realised what I was doing to my life and that if I do Accountancy I will hate my life everyday! So I changed my subjects around and I'm pursuing a different degree and ever since then my mums just been kind of cross with me.

So even if I lived in England I doubt my mum would even offer to help fund my course. :colonhash:

Quick Reply

Related discussions

Latest

Trending

Trending

Articles for you