alcoholic parent

so my mom is an alcoholic and she has been for years. i have never felt properly loved by her and i suspect she is a narcissist. my father doesnt fight back at all, be does what she says, is kind of stuck with her, cannot defend himself.
the thing is most of the time im not even aware of this/i dont really think about it. (in periods that she doesnt trink) i wonder if its a bad thing, if this is a sign im "keeping things away" and it might bite me back later?
does anyone have a similar situation, how do you cope? are you afraid of becoming the same?
i am jealous of people with a "normal" family

Reply 1

Anonymous #2

Original post by Anonymous

so my mom is an alcoholic and she has been for years. i have never felt properly loved by her and i suspect she is a narcissist. my father doesnt fight back at all, be does what she says, is kind of stuck with her, cannot defend himself.
the thing is most of the time im not even aware of this/i dont really think about it. (in periods that she doesnt trink) i wonder if its a bad thing, if this is a sign im "keeping things away" and it might bite me back later?
does anyone have a similar situation, how do you cope? are you afraid of becoming the same?
i am jealous of people with a "normal" family

OP, I'm genuinely so sorry you're experiencing this. Associations like NACOA I've heard can be very useful. Please do give them a ring if it's causing you stress. They will give you the best advice. Do you have any brothers/ sisters you get on with that can support you through this? Surround yourself with good friends that support you and focus on what's important to you, your interests, work hard in your favourite subjects. Don't be scared about becoming like her - that is something you have control over if you seek help now. Please do post any time it's getting to you.

Reply 2

Ladymusiclover

20

My mum I suspect is alcohol dependent ( has to have several glasses per night) andsuffers from depression. It's tough. I sort of block it out with music just as a form of escapism. It's the main reason I want to live away for uni.

Reply 3

Anonymous #3

Original post by Anonymous

so my mom is an alcoholic and she has been for years. i have never felt properly loved by her and i suspect she is a narcissist. my father doesnt fight back at all, be does what she says, is kind of stuck with her, cannot defend himself.
the thing is most of the time im not even aware of this/i dont really think about it. (in periods that she doesnt trink) i wonder if its a bad thing, if this is a sign im "keeping things away" and it might bite me back later?
does anyone have a similar situation, how do you cope? are you afraid of becoming the same?
i am jealous of people with a "normal" family

Hi, sorry to hear about your situation. My father died from alcoholism towards the end of primary school and alcoholism is common amongst the rest of my family. I think it's normal that you just accept life as it is. I am open about my family with friends but to be honest most of them seem disinterested. But to those who will listen, talking helps if it bothers you :smile:

Reply 4

Napp

22

My sympathies. Think of it like this, you've already had to deal with a rather hard time and you'll be stronger from it.

Reply 5

Camilli

17

There are a lot of people in your situation. No reason you have to become an alcoholic yourself, although the odds are higher for you and your spouse because of all this.

More important is that your communication skills and ways of dealing with relationships will have been affected even if you don't drink. Do some homework on this, and consider seeing what kind of repairs you can have done on yourself. Counseling, support groups, reading, etc.

It is a *****, but recognizing and dealing with it now will save you a lot of pain later on.

alcoholic parent

Quick Reply

Related discussions

Latest

Trending

Trending

Articles for you