So I'm posting this as I'm just really confused as would really appreciate any advice really.
So on Saturday I went out with my friends and we were having a sound night then we went into this club and I started chatting with this group of lads as I knew one of them and hadn't seen them in a while. One of them bought me a drink and dared me to down it, which as I was drunk and with some "friends" I didn't see the problem.
By this point my actual friends were downstairs enjoying themselves and I went and joined them and I felt proper weird and started having a massive panic attack and everything started feeling really intense. Having done MDMA a couple of times I knew that's what it was, or the same feeling but it was so overwhelming and the last thing I remember saying or doing was turning to my friend Jack (fake name ✌🏻️) and saying you need to look after me, I need help and saying I was scared to him and Becky.
I don't think they fully registered what was happening and I apparently wondered off saying I needed Air. Later my friends found me passed out in a cupboard covered in blood and bruises after a member of staff opened the door. They'd been looking for me for nearly an hour, Becky and Jack decided to do one more lap of the club because everyone else left to go searching for me outside the club and in the one next door; luckily Becky saw me lying on the floor when the staff member opened the door.
But yeah, I didn't recognise anyone other then Jack and just kept crying not knowing what was going on. I just kept saying please look after me, so he did. Him and my friends got me home and he stayed over and slept in my bed cause he was worried about me.
So I wake up the next morning with no clue what had happened laying on him cuddling me, when I asked wtf was happening he explained everything then said that when I got home I started having a panic attack again and getting scared and the only with he could think of getting me to sleep was cuddling me to reassure me I was okay.
We laid there for a few hours just chatting n stuff and he randomly went on about he'd had sex with a lad a few times and that no one knew about it, we talked about it for a bit and he just said he needed to get it off his chest, I asked why he told me and he said he felt he could trust me and just needed someone to talk too. As I bisexual lad myself I just gave him any advice I could and said I understood why he'd not tell anyone cause our group of friends are very 'laddy' and were strange about me being Bi to begin with, hence it was a bit of a shock when he told me as I'd never expected it.
I dunno if it was cause of the drugs (MDMA making you love everyone and tactile) and the fact that I was quite vulnerable and he'd legit been there for me but I felt a bit of a connection/feeling starting while we were laying there just chatting. Nothing happened and I'm not sure I'd want it too because it'd be too complicated. He looked after me all day and proper sorted me out and stayed over again on Sunday night, again nothing happened we just chatted and he left for work this morning.
The whole thing has just left me feeling a bit confused and I just needed to get advice from people who don't know me and see what they think I should do? Make a move at some point and potentially ruin a friendship or just leave it. He's a top lad and after him being there for me this weekend I have a lot of respect for him.
I dunno - opinions?
I think I am developing feelings for a friend, advice/help please. (Also got spiked)
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