I have been depressed for the past 6 months. It is probably due to my worries about having to leave my whole life behind, but I am quite certain there is an even deeper cause to it all. Anyway, my life has been quite stressful these few months and the only thought of some relief is that I have a great support system consisting of friends and family.
In just about three weeks I will be leaving my country to start my first year at UCL, and I am extremely worried that my mental health will obstruct my experience. Ever since I started feeling this way I've become much more of an introvert and just the thought of having to socialise is overhwelming (although paradoxically I don't want to be on my own once there). I just feel like I don't fit in anywhere but my home, even though I have moved around a lot in the course of my childhood and adolescence and have never had trouble fitting in. For some reason I don't feel like I will ever be able to grow solid bonds with anyone.
My academic performance has only been superfluously affected by my condition and all the same I have received good IB results (just one point below my predicted grade), yet I am scared I will not be able to cope with the demands of my uni course. I am passionate about the subject I will be studying (literature) but for some reason I've become unsure whether it is REALLY my vocation.
My therapist, some friends of mine, and my parents have suggested that a change of scenery might actually lift my depression. Having become really pessimistic, I highly doubt this. All the same I have paid for my accomodation and missing this important opportunity would probably make me even more depressed.
I would really appreciate some advice from anyone who has been in a smilar situation. All the enthusiasm of starting afresh, becoming independent ecc ecc ecc is being trounced by my worries.
Thank you in advance!
I am depressed, scared to be starting uni in just 3 weeks?
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