I've just moved house and changed schools and if I'm honest I don't know if I actually want to be there. Maybe I'm just not settled in yet. Everyone is really nice and in theory I like it.
But I find myself lost, not knowing what to do, and without friends.
Sixth form definitely isn't what I expected it to be.
Well, I do have my girlfriend. And she is the loveliest person.
I've been spending lunch with her and two of her friends.
We've been going out for over two months now and since we were long distance before this week and had only seen each other a couple of times, our relationship is still pretty innocent/
I guess I should mention now that I have spent the last couple of years trying to get help for depression that has been fairly severe.
And the reason I want to mention that is because my depressed thoughts have expanded from just negativity about me, to negativity about my relationship.
I'm very introverted. This means I struggle with conversations, and unfortunately so is my girlfriend. This means we struggle making conversation between us.
I don't want to end my relationship. I love my girlfriend and I don't want to lose her.
But I have all these horrible thoughts that make me think I should. Maybe she'd be happier without me. Maybe we just worked better in writing. Maybe I just can't hack the whole relationship thing.
I feel as though I'm too focused on myself, and yet I can't seem to get out of my own head.
Nothing is broken in our relationship as far as I can see. It's just awkward because I don't know how to talk and so we're in silence a lot.
Feeling a little wary about my relationship? Kind of?
|Why bother with a post grad? Are they even worth it? Have your say!||26-10-2016|