Self-pity is the most important emotion

I heard a definition of Depression whereby the depressed have lost the ability to pity themselves. This seems accurate, but the question is, how do you get that self-pity back? Is it possible?

Reply 1

Deyesy

Original post by Mistletoe

I heard a definition of Depression whereby the depressed have lost the ability to pity themselves. This seems accurate, but the question is, how do you get that self-pity back? Is it possible?

You feel as though people with depression have lost the ability to pity themselves? :holmes:

Reply 2

Zargabaath

What does self pity achieve?

Reply 3

Mistletoe

Original post by Zargabaath

What does self pity achieve?

It achieves self-soothing. De-stressing, eventually.

Original post by Deyesy

You feel as though people with depression have lost the ability to pity themselves? :holmes:

Yes, and the reason is because they hate themselves.

Reply 4

Deyesy

Original post by Mistletoe

It achieves self-soothing. De-stressing, eventually.

Yes, and the reason is because they hate themselves.

Surely if you hate yourself; that is in itself a form of self-pity? :holmes:

Reply 5

Zargabaath

Original post by Mistletoe

It achieves self-soothing. De-stressing, eventually.

To an extent I agree, but when it overwhelms you to the point you aren't doing anything but self pitying, i think it's quite damaging and certainly not helpful.

But yes, i also understand that that mindset isn't a conscious choice someone makes

Reply 6

Mistletoe

Original post by Deyesy

Surely if you hate yourself; that is in itself a form of self-pity?

No, because the Depressed do not feel they deserve pity when actually they deserve it the most. It is only normal undepressed people who will automatically feel a sense of self-pity when they get an incling of self-hatred. That self-pity cures their self-hatred for that moment. But like I said, depressed people have an infinite self-hatred, usually because of circumstances they have created in their mind. They feel trapped emotionally, perhaps there is reason for it, but they haven't been able to do the calculations that would enable them to escape from their mental trap.

Original post by Zargabaath

Many people who come to TSR are on their way to becoming depressed. The self-pity you witness is them trying to hold onto sanity for as long as possible.

(edited 7 years ago)

Reply 7

Zargabaath

Original post by Mistletoe

Many people who come to TSR are on their way to becoming depressed. The self-pity you witness is them trying to hold onto sanity for as long as possible.

I see the self pity as a trap, a mindset poeple fall into and can't get out from. It just gets worse until you make an active effort to fix things

Reply 8

Deyesy

Original post by Mistletoe

Self-pity cures their self-hatred for that moment? For me self-pity makes any self-hatred worse and things 'outside' of my mind can make things better/worse. You seem to be trying to simplify something which isn't simple :/

You've just inferred that people with depression aren't sane when infact many people with the illness lead absolutely normal lives. It's quite a dangerous statement to make imho.