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I have decided to commute second year

I'm a Royal Holloway first year student. I am from Reading, I live in halls. I am not enjoying it. I am enjoying the course but not the rest of it. I am the furtherest thing from a party person and drinker. I am completly teetotal. I have been out three nights to watch Harry Potter at the Harry Potter society but nithing else. I instead do work. Which I am okay with. I go home every weekend, which I love doing. I am thinking that next year I would like to commute as it isn't far, there's a direct train etc... and it'll be much cheaper.
I often feel really down as I miss home, my friends back home commute into uni, they go to Queen Mary's. They find it managable. And I am able to work at home too. I've yet to make any friends and I don't doubt I will feel comfortable to live with anyone I have only known a few weeks. I have mental issues that mean I struggle with this- meaning I have to know someone a really long time before I would be comfortable to do something like move in. Living on my own completly would be too expensive so commuting would be a better option. My parents acknowledge this is an option but they have adopted a wait and see opinion. I am commited to the idea of commuting. I haven;t told them I am commited to it yet as they'll say it is too early.
I am seriously unhappy in halls, I countdown the days until I go home at weekends, I have worked out the total number of nights until the end of the year.
You don't ask any questions so I don't know if you want advice, but I can offer some if you like.
Reply 2
I kind of what opinions and I wouldn't say no to any advice
Original post by maryling1997
I'm a Royal Holloway first year student. I am from Reading, I live in halls. I am not enjoying it. I am enjoying the course but not the rest of it. I am the furtherest thing from a party person and drinker. I am completly teetotal. I have been out three nights to watch Harry Potter at the Harry Potter society but nithing else. I instead do work. Which I am okay with. I go home every weekend, which I love doing. I am thinking that next year I would like to commute as it isn't far, there's a direct train etc... and it'll be much cheaper.
I often feel really down as I miss home, my friends back home commute into uni, they go to Queen Mary's. They find it managable. And I am able to work at home too. I've yet to make any friends and I don't doubt I will feel comfortable to live with anyone I have only known a few weeks. I have mental issues that mean I struggle with this- meaning I have to know someone a really long time before I would be comfortable to do something like move in. Living on my own completly would be too expensive so commuting would be a better option. My parents acknowledge this is an option but they have adopted a wait and see opinion. I am commited to the idea of commuting. I haven;t told them I am commited to it yet as they'll say it is too early.
I am seriously unhappy in halls, I countdown the days until I go home at weekends, I have worked out the total number of nights until the end of the year.

how long is the journey?
Reply 4
Original post by jonathanemptage
how long is the journey?


40 minutes plus a 10 minute bus or 20 minute walk
Original post by maryling1997
40 minutes plus a 10 minute bus or 20 minute walk


in that car it's not really a good idea with second year particularly it's a very intensive year requiring a lot more studying than first year not to mention group work I know it's not what you wan to hear but I and many others on this forum wouldn't recommend it.

At the end of the day it's up to you but i wouldn't have done it.
Reply 6
Original post by jonathanemptage
in that car it's not really a good idea with second year particularly it's a very intensive year requiring a lot more studying than first year not to mention group work I know it's not what you wan to hear but I and many others on this forum wouldn't recommend it.

At the end of the day it's up to you but i wouldn't have done it.

Thats on the train, so i canwork on the train
Original post by maryling1997
40 minutes plus a 10 minute bus or 20 minute walk


With that short a journey I'm surprised you didn't just stay at home to be honest. It's perfectly doable. :smile:
Reply 8
Original post by sinfonietta
With that short a journey I'm surprised you didn't just stay at home to be honest. It's perfectly doable. :smile:


I wish i had. I really hate living in halls
OK, here's my advice.

It's very normal to feel like this after a few weeks of university when living away from home. Most people will not talk about it so you end up feeling like the only one who feels this way. Often this gets better over time, so I think your parents' idea to wait and see is best.

I guess you're committed to halls for the rest of the year? If so, then don't isolate yourself and stop going out and making friends. If you do, you will very likely have a bad time. Again, many people do not make friends instantly and mistakenly think that everyone else has got a friendship group and so they will always be left out. You don't have to go out drinking - lots of people don't like that, and you often find the drinking culture lessens after the first few weeks.

Do you have any hobbies or societies you could join? That's a good way to meet people without going out drinking.

There are lots of advantages to living in halls. It's good preparation for independent living. After all, you are going to leave home in a few years anyway. But see how you feel come the end of the year before committing to commuting (which is totally fine by the way). And in the meantime, don't shut yourself away and turn your unhappiness into a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Original post by maryling1997
Thats on the train, so i canwork on the train


Sorry that was auto corrected I meant that case**(not car) our parents are right wait and see I hate to break it to you doing good work on a train is not easy this is why I advise living out but as I say it's up to you
Original post by maryling1997
I'm a Royal Holloway first year student. I am from Reading, I live in halls. I am not enjoying it. I am enjoying the course but not the rest of it. I am the furtherest thing from a party person and drinker. I am completly teetotal. I have been out three nights to watch Harry Potter at the Harry Potter society but nithing else. I instead do work. Which I am okay with. I go home every weekend, which I love doing. I am thinking that next year I would like to commute as it isn't far, there's a direct train etc... and it'll be much cheaper.
I often feel really down as I miss home, my friends back home commute into uni, they go to Queen Mary's. They find it managable. And I am able to work at home too. I've yet to make any friends and I don't doubt I will feel comfortable to live with anyone I have only known a few weeks. I have mental issues that mean I struggle with this- meaning I have to know someone a really long time before I would be comfortable to do something like move in. Living on my own completly would be too expensive so commuting would be a better option. My parents acknowledge this is an option but they have adopted a wait and see opinion. I am commited to the idea of commuting. I haven;t told them I am commited to it yet as they'll say it is too early.
I am seriously unhappy in halls, I countdown the days until I go home at weekends, I have worked out the total number of nights until the end of the year.


Are you registered with the DDS for your mental health issues? If not, I would strongly recommend you prioritise doing that ASAP! The Mental Health Adviser at RHUL is really excellent and would take good care of you as best as she can (I can vouch for her because I may as well live in her office, the amount of time I spend in there :biggrin: ) :yep:

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