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Girlfriend won't let me see her naked.

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Reply 20
Avatar for squeak
squeak
21
Like someone else said light candles, so it's one step up. can be very sexy lighting.

I find if you make it not as serious, she'll be able to let go. sex is fun.

let her know she is sexy. over and over and over again :wink2:
Reply 21
Avatar for Anonymous #1
Anonymous #1
OP
shona
Well, there you go.

You're the first man she's slept with, and you think she's unhygienic and tastes disgusting.

No wonder she feels like crap.

I can't give you a solution, but I've certainly underlined the problem for you. Down to you now.


lol ... I've not actually told her that straight, that's my personal view on the act. A view which is also pretty much shared by her, she doesn't like oral sex either ... it's not a part of our relationship, and we're both fine with that.
Reply 22
Avatar for Anonymous #1
Anonymous #1
OP
mermania
is she fat?


Nope, perfect 10 (apologies to size conscious people above size 10.. it's just a saying)
Helenia
not to mention the unrealistic expectations given to guys by the surgically enhanced girls in porn, that some girls just think they won't compare.


I have to disagree with this in part. I certainly don't think it is men's unrealistic expectations but more women's perception of what these expectations are - if girls genuinely believe that men expect a big busted, thin waisted bottle blonde when they take their tops off then they need to get a grip and try and understand us a bit better. Of course I don't actually think that self-conciousness issues really are at heart caused by such things but more by more long-term problems perhaps from childhood. Sadly such things may (just may) be an expression of problems arising from abuse as a child.
I don't mind when having sex being naked.
or after whilst in bed.

but my b/f finds it amusing that i always grab something to put on the moment i get out of the duvet like a big pillow to cover me up, just to turn the dvd on/off.

i just think some people arent comfortable with themselves. does it really bother you?. all you can do is reassure her she's beautiful etc...n just see if eventually she feels more comfortable.
Reply 25
Avatar for shona
shona
10
Anonymous
lol ... I've not actually told her that straight, that's my personal view on the act. A view which is also pretty much shared by her, she doesn't like oral sex either ... it's not a part of our relationship, and we're both fine with that.


Yes, but you don't have to say something like that in so many words for her to know that's how you feel! Women pick up on subtleties! As for her not liking oral sex, that could quite simply be her being scared of 'not doing it right'. After all, what experience does she have of it?

If you don't genuinely love every part of her body, she will be picking up on that, and that's probably what's making her feel so uncomfortable in her own skin.
Reply 26
Avatar for shona
shona
10
Anonymous
Nope, perfect 10 (apologies to size conscious people above size 10.. it's just a saying)


Are you calling me fat? Don't worry, I'm just joking. :p:

To be honest, I think the girls I know with the biggest hang ups are the skinny ones. Which is quite ironic, because they really don't anything to be getting upset about.

The truly beautiful never seem to realise that's what they are.
Reply 27
Avatar for squeak
squeak
21
yep my boyfriend said he didn't like my nipples once. he's rarely seem them since :p:

heh...
Reply 28
Avatar for Nadinus
Nadinus
1
Anonymous
lol ... I've not actually told her that straight, that's my personal view on the act. A view which is also pretty much shared by her, she doesn't like oral sex either ... it's not a part of our relationship, and we're both fine with that.


That's not what you originally said, you said that she didn't have a problem with it, it was you who did.
Even if she has told you that, she'll be lying to keep you happy, or because she feels horribly insecure about it. I can't imagine how offended I would be if a guy had that attitude towards me, and I don't see why any girl wouldn't be. If she has low self-esteem then obviously she's not going to start disputing you on that.
And any agreement is not an equal one: you don't want to because you find it disgusting, she doesn't want you to because you've made her feel uncomfortable (and unfairly so) with it.

While she might have issues, believe me you need to do your part to make her feel happy with herself.
Seriously, take a from a girl's perspective,
I used to say to my bf that I didn't like oral sex (receiving) but only because I was ridiculously self conscious about it.

When he finally managed to convince me I was beautiful, and sexy...he performed oral, and I was fine with it after that... he used to love doing it.
Reply 30
Avatar for Nadinus
Nadinus
1
Lucky for you, OP's gf doesn't have a chance with his attitude :/
Reply 31
Avatar for Anonymous #1
Anonymous #1
OP
moshing-fairy

i just think some people arent comfortable with themselves. does it really bother you?

shona

you don't genuinely love every part of her body, she will be picking up on that, and that's probably what's making her feel so uncomfortable in her own skin



It doesn't bother me as such .. and I do love everything about her, but I'm not too experienced with the relationship thing either, and I just thought that being naked was part of the sexual side of things ... I posted about it to get an idea of how common it was amongst young women..
Exactly, all I can really say is that you're not convincing enough. Why does it matter what giving oral is like for you? It's not about you. It's all about the girl. Open your mind for ****'s sake.
Reply 33
Avatar for Nadinus
Nadinus
1
Oh so when someone suggests a likely reason for her insecurity, it doesn't bother you or make you want to do anything about it? Hmm...you sound like a caring boyfriend...
My bf was like this took me ages to practically prise out of him that he had really bad acne on his chest. Reassure her that you dont mind and that you love her as her.

EDIT: i still have to turn around to this day when he changes his top like before going out but hell change the bottom half without
Yeah but the point is to make the girl forget her insecurities, make them disappear. Otherwise you're just as judgmental as everyone else, if you see 'problems' in the person you're going out with then what's the point?
Anonymous
It doesn't bother me as such .. and I do love everything about her, but I'm not too experienced with the relationship thing either, and I just thought that being naked was part of the sexual side of things ... I posted about it to get an idea of how common it was amongst young women..



COMMON.

who is secure :smile:.

even when i was really quite slim.

and now im 8/10 and i still dont like it.

even if u dont think you are fat or whatever. being naked is being very vulnerable and open with someone.

she can still love you and not feel that comfortable with it. if it doesn't bother you, don't bother her about it :smile:
Just a thought but what about getting her something a bit more sexy to wear in bed
Reply 38
Avatar for Anonymous #1
Anonymous #1
OP
Nadinus
Oh so when someone suggests a likely reason for her insecurity, it doesn't bother you or make you want to do anything about it? Hmm...you sound like a caring boyfriend...


What's with the attacking me?

It's not about Oral sex ... it's both her vagina and her breasts (she lets me kiss and lick her breasts ... pretty much anything goes, just not touching nipples with my fingers, or seeing them)

I had a bad previous experience with a girl who didn't keep herself as clean as she should have ... and it put me off the whole thing in general. I don't think the lack of Oral sex between us is causing her to feel uncomfortable around me :s-smilie:
I like the way it has a capital :P.


AND.....we arent attacking you.
just....i dont get why it bothers you that much. im sure it'll change. unless you make it worse, which you dont seem to be but this whole oral sex thing seems to be being talked about. so are u sure thats not an issue?

just make sure she knows it's past experience not her, you have a problem with.

:smile:

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