[moodring01]

I'm a gay and you could party with me anytime. I hated most of school but it's only in the last year that people have grown up and there's been a lot of talking. I know where you're coming from and believe me there's hope. I'm not about to discuss my life in front of everyone but I hated it for a long while and then only since about October of last year that I really got a hold of myself and I'm gaining confidence.

Ugliness is relative. Be glad tastes vary. I've never had a bf or had sex but I will, someday soon. Be at peace with that.

Oh yeah and I'm 17 aswell.

[Anonymous.]

(Original post by moodring01)
I'm a gay and you could party with me anytime. I hated most of school but it's only in the last year that people have grown up and there's been a lot of talking. I know where you're coming from and believe me there's hope. I'm not about to discuss my life in front of everyone but I hated it for a long while and then only since about October of last year that I really got a hold of myself and I'm gaining confidence.

Ugliness is relative. Be glad tastes vary. I've never had a bf or had sex but I will, someday soon. Be at peace with that.

Oh yeah and I'm 17 aswell.

Op- Give it a go...this can be your first step

[Anonymous]

Are you sure you're gay? 17 is a rather young age to decide something as significant as that. I have friends who decided they were gay at that age, tried out the 'lifestyle' for a few years and are now decidedly heterosexual. Sadly they have rather a lot of regrets.

[moodring01]

Are you sure? I know it's not to me but

Um.

Yes.

Rather young at 17??? I was 10.

I'm afraid I don't like what you're saying.

[coldfish]

I'm as willing to say that one can't be sure of being gay at 17 as you are that one can't be sure of being heterosexual at 17. I was utterly sure that I was gay when I was 17. This is because in retrospect I could see that I'd never had sexual feelings about women, but I had about men. It's not that hard to work out, really.

Incidentally (and this isn't aimed soley at you, Mr Anonymous), I hate the word "lifestyle" being used in this manner. See how absurd it sound to talk of the "straight lifestyle", and compare it.

[graemematt]

(Original post by moodring01)
Are you sure? I know it's not to me but

Um.

Yes.

Rather young at 17??? I was 10.

I'm afraid I don't like what you're saying.

You knew at 10?? Wow, isnt that a bit young to have decided?

(not that i'd know, i'm heterosexual, just seems quite young to be so certain!)

[moodring01]

No. Not necessarily certain because you are very young still but I haven' thought about a girl since I was 10 and I know sexuality can shift and I'd embrace that but I'm as sure as you can be of anything.

[coldfish]

This is what we're saying Graemematt:
You confidently assert that you wouldn't know because you're heterosexual. But this gives you a pretty perfect analogy. You wouldn't doubt your heterosexuality at 17 based on the idea that it's too young to decide that kind of thing. Further, the fact that in society at the moment realising your homosexuality requires a bit of thinking out probably means that people who think that they're gay are probably more reliably so than people who think that they're straight.

[Anonymous]

I'm just saying - it's probably better not to have homosexual sex at that age, could have a boyfriend etc though. Nothing wrong with being single and waiting a few more years to see how things pan out, before you get some very... lasting memories.

[Miss Mary]

Hmmm... I know a friend of mine who is in the same situation as yours. With the only difference that he is not gay, but yeah he is ugly (actually HE thinks he is ugly, but I don't), and he's never kissed anyone yet, and he doesn't go out that much, cuz he is shy.

But, when he does get out with friends, he is so much fun! It is amazing how much he changes when he is with friends.

Maybe you should go out at least one night with people you like and see what happens. That thing about thinking that you are ugly is stupid to me. And no, I'm not the world's prettiest girl, but surely there's people out there that might think "hey, look at that guy over there, he looks cute". I mean, the fact that YOU think that you are ugly does not mean that EVERYBODY thinks you are ugly. But of course, if you don't go out, then you will never find out that kind of people.

So my advice is: go out every now and then to places you like and with people you like.

[bearbear]

Why are you so desperate for a relationship? I'd say most people at 17 haven't really had one yet. Many also will have never come close.

[Anonymous]

Im 25 and straight but attracted to men when im really horny(esp shemales) Im not sure what that makes me actually, sometimes I wonder if im gay, but then I often dream about marrying a woman I love and having kids and growing old and dying.

I lost my virginity to a guy and "loved him" in the way I felt close to and friendly etc.

Anyway confidence isnt easy mine has got hugely worse over the years when I was 17 I got a lot of female attention but when I was at school girls called me ugly horrible etc to my face.

I think it was because I was quite slim at the times(still about half a stone overweight which seemed to be a beer gut) and girls found me sweet and kind(I blushed all the time as was shy)

It gets worse in later years, as every time I try to talk to someone I babble so people think im a weirdo, but I only speak in order to make friends but my minds blank, and people always make excuses to leave etc and/or call me freak behind my back.

Got really hurt recently as this girl in my class seemed to fancy me a lot, and asked me into her group a few times, but this other lad kept finding excuses to butt in and be in her group, and talked over me and made sure everytime we did group work he rushed beside her.

He dates her now and he knows I really like her(well before he had an interest)

[Blue Rose]

Aww. I just wish I could give you a great big

;console; Don't think like that. I have never seen an ugly person in my life. I doubt you are ugly.
And I understand how you can feel lonely. I'm a girl in a similar situation. Not 100% sure if Im gay, but I'm more gay than str8.
I have never kissed a girl or guy, never been out with anyone.

Why is it that you don't eat lunch with other people and go out anywhere with other people? Have you just found it hard to make friends at school/college/uni?

[Frodz]

As my title explains I am ugly gay and lonely. Which I guess you would have heard so many times before but I really think I need some advice.
I am a 17-year-old guy and I’m gay. And I have 3 main problems:
1 – I have never had a boyfriend. I have never been on a date with a guy, I have never kissed a guy, and I have never had any form of sex either. This is also true for girls and me.
2 – I do believe that I am ugly. This is the main reason why I believe my 1st point is true. In that I must be ugly because if I was the slightest bit attractive, I surly should have had a boyfriend. Also being ugly has made me have no confidence either, which again is another reason I fell I have never had boyfriend.
3 – I am very lonely. I say this because firstly, I have never had a boyfriend, but also I don’t really have that many friends. I don’t talk to people at my school, I don’t hang out with anyone at lunch or sit with people in lessons. And I have only ever been out ONE Friday night EVER, I have never been out on a Saturday. I don’t go to parties, get drunk, or doing anything all other teenagers do.
So there you go, pretty much sucks don’t you think. I kind of see it all us one big circle, in that I don’t go out, therefore I don’t meet guys, so I don’t get boyfriends. Also I’m ugly so I don’t get boyfriends, so I don’t go out and spent Friday night with them, etc. I hope you can understand where I’m coming from.
Well that’s all I have to say! I would really appreciate ANY advice that people can give me.

Hey, i'm 21 and still not had a bf! I don't think i'm ugly and many think i'm pretty hot, i'm probably my harshest critic! I only kissed/had sex etc with a guy when i turned 19, my first proper date when i turned 21.

The good thing however is i know why i didn't have much luck before so i'm working to fix it.

Having a bf or not really has nothing to do with looks, it's about personality. The key to your problem is no. 3 - Friends.

How exactly do you expect to meet people if you are not sociable? You won't go to a club and meet a guy if you have no friends to go with!!

Are you a member of any clubs or societies? it's a great way to meet new people, potentially something out of school. I don't know your particular situation but if you look you will find plenty of opportunities to make new friends.

Concentrate on getting at least a small group of close friends and you will find the rest will follow. You'll meet someone you like and you'll realise you are not ugly at all.

[Evizu]

(Original post by Larapink)
To be honest you can only help yourself, by improving your own confidence. You need to love yourslef before anyone else can love you back.

Couldnt have said it better myself

[halátnost]

Ugly, Gay and Lonely - the perfect Soulmates ad.

I mean, come on! Give yourself a bit of credit. You wouldn't actually present yourself like that if you were trying to attract a partner. It's confidence. You need a boost. Maybe take some exercise to boost endorphins or visit your GP see if you can get anything for depression/anxiety issues, just to pull you out a bit.

[RobbieC]

My friend. Take it from the highly overweight gay man. It is entirely about confidence... and knowing that you don't need a million friends or to have had a swarm of boyfriends to have confidence that you're a catch. Sure, people are shallow, gay guys in particular - I am a little myself. But I definitely rate who someone is - it's the most important factor... unless you're just having casual sex.

So go, dance to the pet-shop boys and feel ****ing good about yourself.

[LPK]

(Original post by kiddranc)
Gay men are notoriously shallow.

So, unfortunately you might be resigned to paying for sex. Such is life and it ain't easy!

How can you label people as shallow based on sexuality? I am sure there are shallow heterosexuals too, so lets label them as shallow.

There are plenty of ways to meet people without needing to "pay for sex". Either you don't know much about gay people or you're oblivious to their lifestyle. Either way you shouldn't be giving others advice because what you said is rubbish and nothing more than a stupid label. You'll find shallow people in any group, it's not "notorious" in gay people.

[Anonymous]

Hey everyone, I’m the original post. I just wana say thanks to all the people that replied, all your advice has been read, and I kind of agree with you all. I just need more confidence. Although I do think that the answer to all my problems would either be getting a bf or going out more. But u gota understand that the people at my school no who I am, they just never really make any effort with me, which is mainly because it is the last year or school and everyone has their own groups. And another huge problem for me is that all the people at my school are starting to go clubbing, which I can’t as I turn 18 in July – which by then will be the end of school.
All I can say is I just gota wait until I go university in September.

[Frodz]

If that's the case then my advice would be prepare for going to uni come September.

Uni is a brilliant opportunity to make a change so work out now what you want to change and how to change it. Going to societies in Freshers etc will be a start.