[Anonymous]

recently me and my boyfriend came across problems and decided that, after trying to get past it for a week, it was better to just be friends.

we both agreed it would be for the best looking at what had happened recently and how we were going downhill, but i cant stop thinking about how lovely it was when we were together, and maybe that we made a mistake breaking up over something that wasnt really that bad.

i was fine to begin with, but im really struggling and i have a bad way of coping with things. iv spoken to him since but i really miss how we were and i really dont think he would want to go back to that, even though we're both feeling the same.

after everything, iv realised id much rather be with him, but i know thats not going to happen. any advice to get past this stage?! i thought i could cope but it seems not...!

[candy x]

1) i think a week is a very short period to try to work through problems, it some time takes time.

2) think whether it is him that you miss or the attention. is it being with someone, kissing and cuddling that you miss, or him.

[Anonymous]

1) i think a week is a very short period to try to work through problems, it some time takes time.

i know what you mean. i suggested to him that we tried to carry on through it but things just got worse and i dont think he really gave it much chance after that.

[squeak]

think about the problems you had with him, instead of the good times.

[*anon*]

yeah i thought this about my ex... (that i wanted to get back together) but think about the reason why you actually broke up in the first place. Plus in my situation, it was the fact that i just felt lonely and wanted someone there that was bothering me the most. What about trying for a month or two without seeing/talking to him and just have fun being single and going out with a bunch of friends to keep your mind off him for a while and for both of you to have time to think

[Anonymous]

i spose.

the problem with going out with my best friends is that we were mutual friends with them and i dont want them to feel awkward around me or him, seeing as one of us would see them more than the other...

or am i being stupid!?!

[Hylean]

Perseverance. Try and be with people and stuff, keep your mind off him.

I'm in a similar situation and it's taken me around a month just to be okay on my own for any period of time.

As for mutual friends, maybe see them on different days or just do it altogether and try to get past it. I've become really good mates who my ex's mates, so I'll be seeing her a lot, though we're staying friends so I'd want to see her a lot anyway.

[Boo_2]

why did you break up??

[manderlay in flames]

Originally Posted by squeak

think about the problems you had with him, instead of the good times.

I could see you being hard to get along with

[Anonymous]

Originally Posted by Boo_2

why did you break up??

well we were annoying each other about tiny things, and so i asked him how he felt about us. he decided to go and "think" for a few days and came back to me to tell me that he didnt want to upest me but he liked another girl, but still loved me and didnt want anything to change that.

but then he started talking to her more and more and i couldnt handle it so we kept arguing. we both decided that even though we still loved each other at the time, it was better to be friends than keep falling out and getting on each other's nerves.

[squeak]

Originally Posted by only nihilism

I could see you being hard to get along with

why? I'm the nicest person ever. I was merely giving the most sensible advice for getting over an ex. too many people think 'oh but we were soo good'...yet they broke up for a reason...remember that reason and you won't wana get back with them.

[manderlay in flames]

Originally Posted by squeak

why? I'm the nicest person ever. I was merely giving the most sensible advice for getting over an ex. too many people think 'oh but we were soo good'...yet they broke up for a reason...remember that reason and you won't wana get back with them.

The reason seems more to be him than her so I don't think that'll help, it's more mutual for him than her I think.

And anyone who describes themselves as nice is evil so that's just scary

[xxxchrisxxx]

do you miss him or the feeling of being with someone?

[squeak]

Originally Posted by only nihilism

The reason seems more to be him than her so I don't think that'll help, it's more mutual for him than her I think.

And anyone who describes themselves as nice is evil so that's just scary

so you think her thinking...'hmmm my boyfriend said he likes another girl, and he carried on talking to her which made us argue' will make her fall at his feet?

[manderlay in flames]

Well if my girlfriend split up with me because she preferred someone else thinking "oh we had problems" isn't going to help because the only problem is her not liking me and ending it. There would be no "bad times" or "reasons why we split up" to console me, it'd just be the end of something beautiful.

[Anonymous]

Originally Posted by xxxchrisxxx

do you miss him or the feeling of being with someone?

i dont know. i thought it was just the feeling, but after a stupid reminisce (i know i shouldn't have done it, that's why it's stupid... ) about the past im starting to think it was actually him, and how amazing he was.

[manderlay in flames]

tell me more about why he's so amazing

[Anonymous]

lol well i dno. he was just nicer than anyone iv ever met before.

maybe i've just met the wrong people! lol

[Anonymous]

eep thats a lot of lols, sorry!

[Stenny]

Re: just friends...

1) i think a week is a very short period to try to work through problems, it some time takes time.

2) think whether it is him that you miss or the attention. is it being with someone, kissing and cuddling that you miss, or him.


Hey yeah this is a sound bit of advice it condsider this more than the other bits and if you still feel you like them at the end of the day then talk to the person about it and just check they dont have the same feelings to.... but hey im a guy so im pants at relationships ps ...

SQUEAKY i love your comments