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Boyfriend had sex with me when I'd passed out.

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    That's rape! I can't think of anything that would justify that. I'm no-one to tell you what to do, but in your shoes I wouldn't continue with the relationship at all, let alone seeing him again.
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    (Original post by MSB)
    How American are you?:p:

    However, I agree. You boyfriend does sound a prick.
    Kidding :p: I don't really talk that way.

    Anyway yeah, as pointed out this is classified as rape, so I'd call the police.
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    omg, i'm not just agreeing with everyone on here for the sake of it. but that was non-consensual sex. non-consensual sex = RAPE.

    get out there quick and get some help, tell someone or call a rape helpline.
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    he really really is not worth it tbh...what he did was rape and anyone deserves better than someone like him

    good luck in whatever you decide to do x
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    ted bundy-esque

    call the police
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    Firstly, I'm sorry you had to experience such a thing; moreover, he has no right to be annoyed at you! He raped you. There's no explanation you can possibly hear from him to justify that in my opinion. But I can understand you want to bring it up though, you'd half want to hear what an earth got into him - you have every right to bring it up. If he doesn't listen then I pretty much agree with Democracy.
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    Yeah but he's my boyfriend, we have had sex many times, so I don't know he just assumed I'd say yes if i were awake.

    Plus he was very drunk (not as bad as me but nearly) plus he's really stressed with exams and sexually frustrated. I can't help it if i don't want sex when he does! :mad: But yeah he's usually a good guy and respectful and i do love him.

    I wouldn't call the police on him ohmygod!
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    I definitely can't believe you need to ask people what you should do.

    You were drunk, you didnt wanna have sex and he had sex with you when you were too weak to fight back...

    lemme give you a definition
    rape = any act of sexual intercourse that is forced upon a person.

    Why would you wanna carry on goign out with a guy like that???? dump him if your clever enough.
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    (Original post by rummang)
    Couldn't this be classed as rape? Sex without consent. Although I heard recently that if a female is 'raped' while drunk it automatically means she consented to it as most woman cannot recall whether they consented or not. I'm pretty sure I read it in a newspaper not long ago. I in no way agree with it though and what your boyfriend did is pretty sick.
    That is utter ******** and wherever you read that is wrong, in fact i'd love to see the source of this information.

    The definition of rape is sex without consent. Disregard relationship/marital status, in any situation if a man has sex with a woman without her consent it is rape.
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    (Original post by Democracy)
    He's a prick. Dump him, then call the cops on his ass
    I highly doubt the cops would give two tosses. They will just see it as a very drunk girl not remembering what she consented... Espiecially as it was your BF that did it....

    But, that doesnt change the fact that he is clearly a complete nob. Bring it up with him and make him explain his actions, tell him you feel as though he raped you and make him feel as bad as you possibly can. Then dump him!
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    its rape, but you'll never prove it

    better to focus on yourself, how you feel, and what you should do next (i.e. at least break up with him)
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Yeah but he's my boyfriend, we have had sex many times, so I don't know he just assumed I'd say yes if i were awake.

    Plus he was very drunk (not as bad as me but nearly) plus he's really stressed with exams and sexually frustrated. I can't help it if i don't want sex when he does! :mad: But yeah he's usually a good guy and respectful and i do love him.

    I wouldn't call the police on him ohmygod!
    It does not matter how many times you've had sex in the past. You said no beforehand and you said no during it. You did not give your consent. It's a terrible thing to get around when he's been so loving in the past, so perhaps police isn't an option for you. However, you need to recognise what happened for what it is: rape. And so does he.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Yeah but he's my boyfriend, we have had sex many times, so I don't know he just assumed I'd say yes if i were awake.

    Plus he was very drunk (not as bad as me but nearly) plus he's really stressed with exams and sexually frustrated.
    That's not really an excuse. This isn't black and white, though... but you need to bring it up with him, DO NOT let him get away with this. What he did was pretty sickening.
    • Thread Starter
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    (Original post by Bear_Grylls)
    he was probably smashed himself, i think everyones over-reacting, although it is a tad bit odd
    He was very smashed. I do too.

    Yeah it is odd, he never usually pulls stunts like this. I'm just worried I can't trust him anymore.
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    Ok I think you need to tell him that what he did was wrong and it must NEVER happen again.
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    This reminds me of a time when a friend said:

    "You know, if I was having sex with a sleeping girl...what would that be?"

    The answer is - rape

    no simple way about it. And in this case, not only had you said no, but you were so out of it you couldn't properly consent, so it's an undeniable case, boyfriend or not. Even a husband can't have sex with his own wife when she's asleep/comatose/paralytic regardless of a "yes" or "no".
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    (Original post by rummang)
    Couldn't this be classed as rape? Sex without consent. Although I heard recently that if a female is 'raped' while drunk it automatically means she consented to it as most woman cannot recall whether they consented or not. I'm pretty sure I read it in a newspaper not long ago. I in no way agree with it though and what your boyfriend did is pretty sick.
    You're confused.

    It's if she gives consent when very drunk - it's still classed as rape as she was in no fit state to give consent.
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    sack the ****er off.
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    god, what sort of guy find a unconscious girl attractive? that's like...necrophilia, in a way. no response or..ew..thats just wrong :|
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    thats rape, hes a prick, you should shoot him

    or, chop his bits off, feed them to him, then shoot him :P

    i hope you're ok, he doesnt deserve to live
Updated: June 16, 2008
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