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jonathan122
Firstly, I think it's appalling that your partner is putting you throught this.

Getting off my high horse for a minute, do you think he would listen if a doctor were to talk to him about the mental and physical problems that could result from this pregnancy?
My honest advice would be for you to go and talk to your doctor on your own first of all (without telling your partner) and then you would at least have a professional on your side.

At the end of the day though, it really is up to you, not him.


Could being the key word here. And also, she has been through it twice and has had no mental problems (that she has mentioned anyway) so why should it come out all of a sudden from one child? It has happened twice before and she has got through it fine.


And OP...why didnt you use contraception if you didnt want another baby? Its not as though you didnt know the consequences of yur actions is it?

I think she is being extremely unreasonable.


EDIT: whoever gave me the neg rep, ermm, thanks. I can understand why you may not agree with me but leaving a name would be nice. And also, thanks for the pos rep whoever it was. :smile:
Hey everyone one, im not really sure why im posting this i guess its just to get it all out!

Im 19 and broke up with my bf about 4 weeks ago and we were having unprotected sex as we both wanted a baby. About a week after week broke up i had unprotected sex(regularly) with a guy im sort of seeing but he didnt cum in me.

And from the begining/end of last week ive been getting really really bad headaches, feeling so tired all i want to do is sleep no matter how long ive slept for! also ive been feeling sick on and off most days, made worse if i eat or dont eat!!

Im going to take a test but if i am pregnant i dont know whos it is! (which to me is the worst thing that could of happend). i want it to be my exs as we love each other still and he doesnt have 'baggage' like the other guy has!

If i tell my ex i dont know whos it is im going to break his heart, i feel like total **** about this situation! Can a doctor tell me the conception date? If i am pregnant.


Does anyone have any advice they can give me?
Thanks
Anonymous
Can a doctor tell me the conception date? If i am pregnant.


No, I don't think the exact conception date can really be determined I'm afraid. I mean, you can work out a rough date based on the date of your last period, but finding out the exact date isn't likely to happen.

When you are 12 weeks pregnant you can get a dating scan done, which yells you the age of the foetus and when it's due based on its size, but again it's not an EXACT by any means.

When I was pregnant with my son, based on my last period he would have been due 2nd August. Then when I went for my 12 week dating scan, it placed his estimated due date as 31st July.
He ended up being born 14th August.

The only way to determine who the father is to get an actual paternity test done I think.

Are you keeping your baby?

edit: just realised you don't actually know whether or not you are pregnant. Well try not to worry too much, you may not be pregnant in any case.
PinkMobilePhone
No, I don't think the exact conception date can really be determined I'm afraid. I mean, you can work out a rough date based on the date of your last period, but finding out the exact date isn't likely to happen.

When you are 12 weeks pregnant you can get a dating scan done, which yells you the age of the foetus and when it's due based on its size, but again it's not an EXACT by any means.

When I was pregnant with my son, based on my last period he would have been due 2nd August. Then when I went for my 12 week dating scan, it placed his estimated due date as 31st July.
He ended up being born 14th August.

The only way to determine who the father is to get an actual paternity test done I think.

Are you keeping your baby?

edit: just realised you don't actually know whether or not you are pregnant. Well try not to worry too much, you may not be pregnant in any case.


ive completly messed up my periods so i cant remember when my last one finished or when im due next! what do i do? choose which one will be the better dad and hope it comes out their colour?!!!!
if i am pregnant i will keep it,personally i dont really believe in abortion.
Reply 84
Someone told me (not too sure if this is actually true) that when you reach 12 weeks they can work out 3 days either way.
Sit down and talk it though with your husband
How much of an extra child will affect the upbringing of your other two children and ow it will affect you and maybe your marriage if you feel that might happen

But to be honsent you already have two children so you know this properly would of happened again knowing you have two children
Reply 86
To be fair, asking a bunch of 17 year old college kids isn't going to be very useful in your situation. I would look for advice elsewhere.
op, do what feels right FOR you, yes your partner would need a say, but 1st ask him if he would be willing to put your body through the stress of pregnancy and child birth so soon after a c-section?
get him to think carefuly about what you have already been through.
my partner wanted a yr age gap between our children, but that would mean me getting pregnant when our daughter lily-faye was 3 months old, but i knew i physicaly and mentaly wouldnt beable to cope with it, so explained that to him, it took him a while to accept it but he did in the end.


to the others asking why it would affect her health....the op says that her youngest is only a yr old... she had he/she by c-section, her body therefore will need time to recover due to scarring etc, some doctors i have heard from reccomend you dont fall pregnant for another 18-24 months after a c-section due to scarring etc as some take longer to heal than others.
Reply 88
HJV
To be fair, asking a bunch of 17 year old college kids isn't going to be very useful in your situation. I would look for advice elsewhere.


There is a wide range of ages on TSR, including some people who are parents.
And so far, all of the advice (though people have different opinions on the subject) has been sensible and reasonable
Anonymous
ive completly messed up my periods so i cant remember when my last one finished or when im due next! what do i do? choose which one will be the better dad and hope it comes out their colour?!!!!
if i am pregnant i will keep it,personally i dont really believe in abortion.



eek no you can't just pick one that wouldn't be fair.
Chin up, you haven't done anything wrong you know. It's not like you cheated on anybody.

You can have a pre-natal paternity test done, but it does slightly increase the risk of miscarriage or still birth (it's about a 0.5%-1% risk increase). You need permission from the man that is being tested though - they will swab his mouth. If you don't want your ex to find out that you're unsure of the paternity, why don't you see if the other guy will agree to the test. That way, if it turns out to be not his baby, you can safely tell your ex that it's his, and he doesn't even need to know that you had a paternity test done.

Here is one site which does prenatal paternity tests :

http://www.genetrack.com/uk/dna_prenatal_testing.php

there are others if you google for them. You do have to pay for them though, they aren't free.

If you don't want to do that, you can wait until the child is born - I'm assuming by what you've said that the two guys are different races...in that case it'll be fairly obvious whose child it is - but then you're stuck with having to tell both men that you might be carrying their child, and then having one of them realise at the birth that he's not the father.

Anyway, like I originally said, you might be worrying about nothing. You may not be pregnant :console:
Hey, i took a test last night and it was negative but i dont 'feel' my period coming. And a friend just told me i was PMS-ing! what a piss take!
im going to go to the doctors when i can and see what he says
Anonymous
Hey, i took a test last night and it was negative but i dont 'feel' my period coming. And a friend just told me i was PMS-ing! what a piss take!
im going to go to the doctors when i can and see what he says


You don't 'feel' your period coming? What, you mean you haven't had any cramps? Cramps don't always happen when your period is coming you know - sometimes it just starts suddenly.

Is your period late? Have you been having unprotected sex? (I assume you have otherwise you wouldn't be concerned - right?) If your period is late, just wait a few more days and if it still hasn't arrived then take another test.
Always Always use protection and leave nothing to chance.

I had gotten pregnant the very first time i'd had unprotected sex (condom broke) and was stupid enough not to get emergency contraception.

I had a month of stressful waiting before i found out i was pregnant and the whole seeing a GP thing etc was stressfull too. Luckily i had a misscariage at about week 7and didnt have to take it further, but its never worth the worry of taking a chance.

Now i'm worrying again, i'm on the pill now but i somehow got ahead of myself and missed a pill, had unprotected sex a week and a half later but im still soo worried!

I have defenatly learnt the safety lesson!
what are the chances of pregnancy if penetration occurs but no ejaculation takes place?
Reply 94
why not wear a condom?
silk192
why not wear a condom?

Because it's already happened so I want to know what the risks are.
Reply 96
lol.

Depends on how much semen (pre-cum) came out and its concentration. Some guys have more pre-cum than others and some have none. I'd say slim to none.

Take a pregnancy test in a week or so to be sure.

Don't be foolish next time :wink:.
Reply 97
Anonymous
Because it's already happened so I want to know what the risks are.



im talking about before....if you're so concerned about getting preganant protect yourself and then you wouldnt have to worry....
Reply 98
Not only do a pregnancy test- get an STI check as well. Infertility is a very hard way to learn a lesson.
blindpet
Take a pregnancy test in a week or so to be sure.


You can't just "take it in a week". It has to be in a certain place in her cycle.

OP, I'm sure you'll be fine, the chances are very very slim, but if you are more than a couple of days late for your next period, take a test or go see your doctor who can do one for you.

Also, think about STIs. If you've both been with people before, maybe go get checked out, if you haven't already been.

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