Personal Statement:Law 6

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Law Personal Statement

With developments in information technology and biological sciences confronting the Law with unprecedented challenges, I think that now must be both and exciting and challenging time to study Law. The current world political scene and its effect on the worldwide development of human rights I find particularly interesting and along with ethical dilemmas over issues such as euthanasia, I think that Law would be a fascinating degree to study

My chosen A-level subjects of History, English and Computing reflect my academic interests, particularly socio-linguistics and political history. Studying Business at AS Level improved my knowledge of organisations and the Business World. I am capable with computers and learned the fundamentals of programming myself, allowing me to further develop this ability at college in computing lessons. I enjoy original writing and creative work and in studying History I have been able to further develop my analytical skills and ability to form cogent arguments to support different viewpoints

I am a keen sportsman, with my favourite sports being tennis, rugby and athletics. I play tennis at least once a week in the winter and almost everyday in the summer, belonging to two teams: my local village and my local town. I enjoy tennis squad training in which there is an emphasis on technique and style and have attended squad training for six years. I much prefer to play well and lose than to win whilst playing badly, because I get more enjoyment from pulling off a successful and well-executed shot than I do from looking at a statistic on a sheet

In 2001 I undertook a work experience placement at a local Solicitor's firm which gave me some insight into some of the more ordinary and routine aspects to the Law and the work of a solicitor. I sat in on client consultations, had a go at drafting legal documents and visited both County and Magistrates courts

Another example of paid work experience I have undertaken is with the National Trust's Accounts Department in Cornwall where I worked on a contract to help centralise the accounts on the computers at the National Trust's Head Office in Swindon

I have a sense of social obligation, illustrated by my role in the organisation of a health conference for my year group which aimed to inform students on drugs, contraception and independent living; along with developing awareness of the law regarding sexual offences and encouraging empathy towards victims. I was involved in the eight-month planning process: discussing with various professionals what we would like to see covered in the workshops; writing questionnaires to get student input; producing posters to advertise it, and also helping to ensure that things ran smoothly on the day. I also participated in a paired-reading scheme in which I helped a younger student with reading difficulties to improve his reading age and ability, while I also put in many hours helping to run and umpire younger students' tennis matches in undertaking a Community Sports Leaders Award. My involvement in these things developed my organisational and communication skills while I also felt some pride in the fact that I had done something really worthwhile

I believe that I am an adaptable, articulate and well-rounded student with the necessary drive and application to thrive both academically and socially within a university environment.

Comments

General Comments:

Generally this seems like a good first draft, all necessary information is there and the applicant demonstrates that they are a rounded individual. Structurally it does feel that this statement is a bit disjointed and a bit extra-curricular heavy. After the introduction, a discussion of academics at school is sensible but it lacks the discussion relating it to law. It's a toss up as to whether work experience in law should come before or after this, but it should certainly be above sports. A little more discussion of law would be good early on and then cutting back on the extra-curricular to a single and focused paragraph just prior to the conclusion.

The applicant offers a good overview of themselves as a person however fails to successfully link this with the study of law. This can be done by constantly following up statements by saying why this particular thing is important, relevant or interesting. The applicant has obviously undertaken many activities which are indicative of the hard work and the study of law and they just need to explain and relate this to law more.

In general, punctuation needs more work and it does not appear that the applicant has proof read the work. This would have uncovered many of the structural and punctuation issues. The applicant needs to pay particular attention to spelling.

Comments on the statement:

With developments in information technology and biological sciences confronting the law With subjects, it is not capitalised unless it is the name of something e.g. Law as the title of a course at university. with unprecedented challenges, I think that now must be both an exciting and challenging time to study Law. The applicant makes an interesting comment but does not explain it. What is needed is an appreciation of what these challenges are and how these make it exciting. More detail shows that they really understand what they're saying and why, rather than saying something because it sounds good.. The current world political scene Consider revision? and its effect on the worldwide development of human rights I find particularly interesting It's good to put these things into a PS to show that the applicant has thought about areas that interest them. and along with ethical dilemmas over issues such as euthanasia, I think that Law would be a fascinating degree to study.

The applicant begins with a general comment about the position of law, this is fine and indeed if successful can be interesting. Here however, the statement is not supported or explained. Perhaps such a conclusion could be drawn after discussing the applicants A levels so that a university can see that the applicant had drawn on their knowledge of computing to consider implications for the legal world and how it relates to law.

My chosen A-level subjects of History, English and Computing reflect my academic interests, particularly socio-linguistics and political history. The applicant has failed to link to law, a list of A-levels doesn't add anything and it needs to be discussed in terms of how it has improved their abilities in law. Studying Business at AS Level improved my knowledge of organisations and the Business World The applicant should link to law here, perhaps outlining how many solicitors firms are run now as a business. I am capable meaning what? with computers and learned the fundamentals of programming myself, allowing me to further develop this ability at college in computing lessons. This has no relevance to the course though! It needs to be related to law. I enjoy original writing and creative work and in studying history I have been able to further develop my analytical skills and ability to form cogent arguments to support different viewpoints It would be a good idea to discuss explicitly how this is important in law.

I am a keen sportsman, with my favourite sports being tennis, rugby and athletics. I play tennis at least once a week in the winter and almost everyday in the summer, belonging to two teams: my local village and my local town. I enjoy tennis squad training in which there is an emphasis on technique and style and have attended squad training for six years. I much prefer to play well and lose than to win whilst playing badly, because I get more enjoyment from pulling off a successful and well-executed shot than I do from looking at a statistic on a sheet. The applicant has failed to link this back to law, they should use their sporting achievements to show how they are able to balance studies with other activities. Alternatively they can use it to show how dedicated they are to achieving their goals. The reader doesn't care about how many times per week the applicant trains per se or even whether they're interested in statistics. It needs to relate to law!

In 2001 I undertook a work experience placement at a local Solicitor's firm which gave me some insight into some of the more ordinary and routine aspects to the Law and the work of a solicitor. I sat in on client consultations, had a go at drafting legal documents and visited both County and Magistrates courts. The applicant is clearly interested in law and has valuable experience, however it would be better to introduce something they have learnt and augment it with the work experience, for example: I decided to observe the process of justice first hand having explored it somewhat already in A-level English Literature and indeed through personal research. I found that my work experience in a local Solicitor's firm... etc

Another example of paid work experience I have undertaken is This is both verbose and contrived. There isn't room in a PS for long introducing statements such as this one. with the National Trust's Accounts Department in Cornwall where I worked on a contract to help centralise the accounts on the computers at the National Trust's Head Office in Swindon. Link back to law, this looks like a perfect opportunity to demonstrate that the applicant has the necessary skills. The applicant has failed to be specific and link their experiences back to why they want to study law. It is far too factual and requires the applicant to spend more time expounding why they want to study law from their achievements.

I have a sense of social obligation, illustrated by my role in the organisation of a health conference for my year group which aimed to inform students about drugs, contraception and independent living; along with developing awareness of the law regarding sexual offences and encouraging empathy towards victims. The applicant could have saved some words by combining these two sentences, briefly describing what it is. I was involved in the eight-month planning process: discussing with various professionals what we would like to see covered in the workshops; writing questionnaires to get student input; producing posters to advertise it, and also helping to ensure that things ran smoothly on the day. I also participated in a paired-reading scheme in which I helped a younger student with reading difficulties to improve his reading age and ability, while I also put in many hours helping to run and umpire younger students' tennis matches in undertaking a Community Sports Leaders Award. My involvement in these things developed my organisational and communication skills This is good, even better to demonstrate as well that the applicant understands the crucial role that these play in a law degree. while I also felt some pride in the fact that I had done something really worthwhile This bit less important. No brownie points for being a good samaritan unfortunately.

This last paragraph reads like a list of things which the applicant has been unable to squeeze into the rest of the personal statement. A short sentence at the end to tie each thing together would be beneficial (ie, "having managed to juggle the demands of school work with the practical expectations of other commitments, I feel I am well adversed and ready to succeed in a law degree."

I believe that I am an adaptable, articulate and well-rounded student with the necessary drive and application to thrive both academically and socially within a university environment. It's good but a little cliché. It lacks the personal touch in the sense that many people can and do say this. A short punchy 1 sentence conclusion is desirable but if possible try to make it personal (through experiences).