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Personal Statement:Mathematics 10
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Mathematics Personal Statement
My passion for mathematics was fixed at the age of ten, on the morning that my mathematics teacher told I would be sitting the Junior Maths Challenge, 'as practice for when you are older'. As I nervously started to answer the questions, a whole world began to open before me. I revelled in the problem solving, answering questions of a nature I had not seen before. My teachers were delighted when I emerged from the exam hungry for more. Since then I have consistently demonstrated my aptitude, achieving gold awards through to senior level, and scoring highly in the European Kangaroo.
My middle school supported me by arranging weekly one-hour lessons with Dr Taylor, a local upper schoolteacher. These sessions nurtured my inquisitiveness and explored all areas of science, from genetics to decision mathematics. I thrived on these lessons, which often required independent research or experimentation. My mathematics teacher then nominated me for a two-week summer school for gifted mathematicians in Bedfordshire. We explored encoding and code breaking at Bletchley Park, spread betting with theoretical money on the LSE, and algorithms and their appearances in patterns and nature. I was delighted when I was awarded first prize, particularly because the competition was from extraordinary young people whom I had assumed were far more gifted than myself.
My love of maths is apparent to all those around me - although they do not always understand why! - and I have consistently achieved at a high level. Last year I was awarded the school Mathematics Prize for excellence. My tutoring has enabled several GCSE students to achieve their full potential in their examinations. Tutoring has been a thoroughly enjoyable insight into the fascinating process of teaching and learning.
My A level studies in mathematics and further mathematics have been well rounded, studying all four branches of the syllabus. Pure mathematics is my favourite section as I find satisfaction in the way ideas are developed and put into practice, and the varied applications of integration, differentiation and trigonometry.
Much is made of the relationship between mathematics and music; both have strong intellectual and creative foundations. I believe my mathematical studies are complemented by my third A level - music. I hear and see music in numbers, and my approach to playing or singing is similar to the mindset I use in maths.
I am a dedicated and conscientious student in class, and a key member in many extra-curricular activities. As a keen musician, playing violin, trombone and piano, I contribute to a number of musical ensembles in school and played an integral part in the organisation of our school’s summer concert. I am also a member of several local youth orchestras and bands, with whom I have toured abroad many times, most recently to Italy, France and Belgium.
I have been a volunteer at my local Brownie unit for four years. Over this time I have taken on an increasingly important role in the organisation: working with the girls, the leadership team and the division executive team, running meetings, and latterly keeping the unit accounts. I am working towards my leadership warrant to become a Guider. I believe that the skills and experience that I have gained as a Brownie volunteer have benefited all areas of my life, including in my role as Deputy Head Girl.
It is my ambition to enter a career directly related to my degree. At present I am considering either the teaching profession, or post-doctoral research.
Universities Applied To:
- University of Warwick - Offer AAB plus AEA Merit
- University of Bath - Offer AAC
- Newcastle University - Offer AAB
- The University of Edinburgh - Offer ABB
- The University of Reading - Offer 320 points incl. B in Mathematics
- University of Leeds - Offer AA in Mathematics and Further Mathematics
Grades Achieved:
- GCSE: 3A*s 7As 1B 1 C
- AS Level: ACCD (plus AS in Further Mathematics)
- Predicted Grades: AAB
Comments
General Comments:
This is overall a very good and very well written personal statement which is backed up by the successful application to several prestigious universities. The statement is a good length (3,500 characters) and what sets it apart from many is the passion and enthusiasm which is very clearly demonstrated through a specific mention of a range of activities related to maths - tutoring, maths challenges, awards, extra learning, additional courses etc. Most importantly this enthusiasm is believable and the quality of the writing contains that x-factor which hints at the underlying understanding and intelligence of the applicant.
As always there are some areas for improvement. This statement talks very little about the degree which is being applied to or specific mention of why they wish to study it, although this is certainly implied. A more explicit mention of the degree would help to improve this statement, as would a greater mention of transferable skills and their relevance to a maths degree when talking about extra-curricular activities. There is perhaps a little too extensive a mention of the outside classes/maths challenge at the start and additional material on books read could have been added. The statement starts off a little too fairy-tale like and becomes a little fragmented in the middle of the statement.
As demonstrated by the offers received, in its current form this statement is at a level suitable for a top 5 university and with some minor adjustments this would provide significant weight behind an application to Oxford or Cambridge.
--F1fanatic-14915 18:40, 21 February 2009 (UTC)
Comments on the Statement:
My passion for mathematics was fixed at the age of ten, on the morning that my mathematics teacher told me that I would be sitting the Junior Maths Challenge, 'as practice for when you are older'. A classic introduction for many personal statements is to talk about how the applicant has been interested since a young child. It can be cliché and cringeworthy, but this statement does it better than most. However, a grammatical/sentence error in the first sentence isn't the best of starts. As I nervously started to answer the questions, a whole world began to open before me. I think that this is a little too over the top and the statement would not be lacking if it were omitted. It's important for things to be believable and if it becomes too fairy-tale like then it's not really believable. I revelled in the problem solving, answering questions of a nature I had not seen before. My teachers were delighted when I emerged from the exam hungry for more. Since then I have consistently demonstrated my aptitude, achieving gold awards through to senior level, and scoring highly in the European Kangaroo. This introduction is generally well written but would perhaps benefit from a mention of wishing to study maths at degree level somewhere.
My middle school supported me supported in doing what? This needs further explanation to the reader who will be unfamiliar with the applicants life story. by arranging weekly one-hour lessons with Dr Taylor, a local upper schoolteacher This type of specific detail is not required in a personal statement. For the tutors reading it, they will not care who it was who gave you help since this is a statement about the individual applying and not those who helped them along the way.. These sessions nurtured my inquisitiveness and explored all areas of science, from genetics to decision mathematics. I thrived in these lessons, which often required independent research or experimentation. My mathematics teacher then nominated me for a two-week summer school for gifted mathematicians in Bedfordshire. We explored encoding and code breaking at Bletchley Park, spread betting with theoretical money on the LSE London Stock Exchange or London School of Economics? The context implies that it is the former that is meant, but it is still important to be careful when using acronyms that they will be understood by the reader., and algorithms and their appearances in patterns and nature. I was delighted when I was awarded first prize, particularly because the competition was from extraordinary young people whom I had assumed were far more gifted than myself. There is no need to be self deprecating here. Instead it would be good to mention how this inspired the applicant to study maths at degree level. What has been written so far has been very good in demonstrating a real and believable passion and enthusiasm for the subject of maths but there has been little or no mention as to studying this further at degree level.
My love of maths is apparent to all those around me - Hyphens are a questionable form of punctuation, informal at best and so for a piece of writing such as a personal statement it is probably best advised not to use them. although they do not always understand why! I think jokes about the perception of maths among the masses is probably best avoided for this particular audience of admissions tutors. Occasionally humour can work in a personal statement but it has to be used with care and for the most part is probably best avoided. - and I have consistently achieved at a high level. Last year I was awarded the school Mathematics Prize for excellence. My tutoring has enabled several GCSE students to achieve their full potential in their examinations. Tutoring has been a thoroughly enjoyable insight into the fascinating process of teaching and learning. Ok, but it would be good for the applicant to talk about what they have gained themselves from tutoring. In my own experience I have found that tutoring is very good for solidifying your own understanding since it is very hard to teach something you do not understand yourself. It is also often the case that students can ask apparently simple naive questions which challenge the understanding of the tutor. My A level studies in mathematics and further mathematics have been well rounded, studying all four branches of the syllabus. Pure mathematics is my favourite section as I find satisfaction in the way ideas are developed and put into practice, and the varied applications of integration, differentiation and trigonometry. This is good, but at this point it feels as if the personal statement is becoming slightly fragmented. I think this could be combined with the previous paragraph, as shown here.
Much is made of the relationship between mathematics and music; both have strong intellectual and creative foundations. I believe my mathematical studies are complemented by my third A level which is music. I hear and see music in numbers, and my approach to playing or singing is similar to the mindset I use in maths. I am a dedicated and conscientious student in class, and a key member in many extra-curricular activities. As a keen musician, playing violin, trombone and piano, I contribute to a number of musical ensembles in school and played an integral part in the organisation of our school’s summer concert. I am also a member of several local youth orchestras and bands, with whom I have toured abroad many times, most recently to Italy, France and Belgium. Again I think it would be beneficial to combine this paragraph with the previous one on the subject of music. There is opportunity here to discuss transferable skills such as teamwork and time management which will undoubtedly have been gained while carrying out these performances.
I have been a volunteer at my local Brownie unit for four years. Over this time I have taken on an increasingly important role in the organisation: working with the girls, the leadership team and the division executive team, running meetings, and latterly keeping the unit accounts. I am working towards my leadership warrant to become a Guider. I believe that the skills and experience that I have gained as a Brownie volunteer have benefited all areas of my life, including in my role as Deputy Head Girl. The last bit feels a bit tagged on, an opportunity to mention the fact the applicant was a deputy head girl when short of space. There is nothing wrong with doing this and it is good practise to try to combine similar experiences to save space and demonstrate awareness of the links, but it could be done in a slightly neater way perhaps. It has relevance to skills as a Deputy head girl, but what is missing is the relevance to a maths degree.
It is my ambition to enter a career directly related to my degree. At present I am considering either the teaching profession, or post-doctoral research. These sentences could be combined into one, and a final summary of why the applicant would be well-suited or would benefit from the course would be a good addition.
--F1fanatic-14915 18:40, 21 February 2009 (UTC)