Personal Statement:Pharmacy 2

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Pharmacy Personal Statement

I have always been fascinated by the chemistry of making variety of different medicines to help improve physical and mental illness. As my mother died of cancer it has been my desire to involve myself within a field which search fatal diseases. I am very passionate about chemistry and biology and it is my belief that the skills I will acquire in this area will offer me better clarity and understanding behind the chemistry of making medicines in university. Due to this I would like to go into a field of pharmacy at university

In order to gain further knowledge in pharmacy, my work experience was carried out at Wexham Park Hospital at the pharmacy department. In which, I gained experience in a real everyday work life. My responsibilities included dispensing to different wards around the hospital making sure the dispersion of the medicine was correct especially for the "A 'n' E" ward. I also had a great pleasure in doing ward rounds with the head of the pharmacy department, from which I learnt great deal about how patients were approached and to analyse patient health charts to give them the recommended dosage of any medicine. After this work experience it confirmed my interest in pharmacy and has furthered my passion for it

Whenever it has been possible I have helped out after school on open evenings for the science department and enjoyed giving back something to the school. As well as my love for science I also enjoy playing many different sports within and out of school. I like playing basketball on a regular basis with my friends outside of school. I also have a weekend job were I work at "Marks and Spencers" and feel that I have developed my skills as working part of a team. A weekend job also offers me a little bit of independence, by which I can manage the spending of my own money

I am also currently learning how to play an electric guitar and have been teaching myself along side with a friend and hope to make a band in the near future. I have also taken part in a leadership challenge, which shows I have good communication, team working and leadership qualities. I have also done a course in web designs by NICAS in which I have been credited for

In my spare time I like to read books especially murder mysteries, currently I am reading a book called Icarus by Russell Andrews. With reading books I also read newspapers to keep up with current affairs all around the world

As a person, I would say I have learnt a great deal during the last couple of years especially last year when my mother passed away and there was great deal of grief for the whole family. Such experience has taught me to have a positive outlook to life, to care for people irrespective of whom they are no matter what their culture or background is. I am a keen learner and like to explore new environments

I am enthusiastic about my chosen course and really hope I can make a difference.

Comments

General Comments:

Generally its a solid Personal Statement, but personally I would avoid talking about your mother, it may seem to an admissions tutor that your fishing for sympathy, while that may not be the case, its best to leave comments about how your mother affected your life to an interview where you can explain yourself far better. Relating the statement to Biology and Chemistry is key, and they will ask questions on how you feel they link to pharmacy and the application of it, and you have done this well. It is key to talk about extra curricular activities to show yourself as a more well rounded person, and this you have also done very well in. I would dedicate a paragraph to what subjects you are doing at A Level, and how it will enable you to succeed in studying pharmacy. This is vital, and I would strongly suggest you include a paragraph on this in your statement. I also think its important that you include somewhere, probably best in paragraph 2, when your talking about work experience, how you can relate to different age groups and personalities as customer/patient interaction is key in Pharmacy.

Comments on the statement:

Careful on punctuation, examples:

Paragraph 1: I have always been fascinated by the chemistry of making A variety of different medicines to help improve a patients physical and mental illness.

Also there are certain inaccurate usage of words in your statement, examples being :

Paragraph 1: As my mother died of cancer it has been my desire to involve myself within a field which search (dedicates itself to the prevention of) fatal diseases.

Paragraph 3: A weekend job also offers me a little bit of independence, by which I can manage the spending of my own money.

I would edit the sentence written above by writing "manage my budgeting skills, key to living independently at University and beyond".

There are also little spelling mistakes like "were" when it should be "where" etc, and it would be advisable to check this with spell check on MS Word as these things can come across as unprofessional to an admissions tutor.

The strongest paragraph in this statement is paragraph 2, where it would be helpful to elaborate on how your study of biology/chemistry had prepared you for your work experience, with regards to general understanding of terminology etc.

Overall its a solid statement, key things to reflect on :-

-Punctuation -Grammar -Avoid referring back to your mother at such an early stage of the admissions process, such a thing is best left to an interview where you can explain yourself better. -Make sure you include your a level subjects and why they will prepare you for a career in pharmacy. -Relate almost everything extra curricular in your statement back to how it will prepare you for pharmacy, example being working at M&S teaching you customer interaction and how to deal with different age groups and personalities. -Avoid cliche openings/endings, such as "I have always", its best to be more honest/original by saying, "my study of biology and chemistry has further increased my interest in helping ...". Just as an example.