Personal Statement:Psychology 11

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Psychology Personal Statement

The dynamics of Psychology affect our everyday life and behaviour,this is what me so interested in the subject. From an early age, I often wondered why we act as we do and what effects us as we grow up. I always had a strong interest as to why people were so different even though genetically, everyone is similar. I have thoroughly enjoyed the subject, especially conformity. It fascinates me as it portrays how strong peer pressure can be and I believe this is the main subject that deals with why we act the way we do. We conform everyday, offering a wide knowledge on behaviour. I am enjoying studying how the body and mind work and why certain things affect certain people. I find it useful on a personal basis as it can be used to explain many problems such as how illness is connected to stress.

For 9 years I have aspired to be a teacher. After studying psychology, I am certain that is what I wish to do for the rest of my life. After a weeks work experience at Mill Lodge primary school, I decided I did not want to teach such young students, however, it made me certain that I want to pursue a career in teaching. My work experience increased my patience with children and gave me a wide overview of types of students. For a year and a half I have worked in Tesco, helping my patience and confidence, which was once lacking, has improved, showing a large expanse of people skills, with customers and staff members, giving me the experience of working as a team.

Active participation in school life has also been rewarding. Whilst at Light Hall, I helped with projects run by the school. From February 2005 onwards, I was commended for supporting special needs pupils from Hazel Oak School by helping with IT work. I assisted one teacher and one pupil in helping them create various IT projects. This boosted my enthusiasm to be a teacher. From a young age I played netball, playing for 7 years in total in the position of goal keeper. In Year 11, I taught students in years 7-9 how to play to the best of their abilities. However, I had to give up this hobby when starting college due to other commitments and desire to start extra courses. Regardless, I am determined to begin this hobby once again.

I was part of the student council at Light Hall, additionally attending meetings with the head teacher and other senior staff. In year 11, the 'Student Voice' was introduced where two students from each year, including myself, were selected to speak to the school's board of governors. At college, I joined the student council again. In my first year, I was nominated as a member of my form to be in the student council and I was then asked to attend a 'faculty meeting' every so often with my head of faculty and other students. However, in my second year I am part of a small group of around 10 students in the year who are the 'executive'. My role is Environmental Officer, something I am proud to be representing and passionate about as it is a problem which is being discussed globally and I am happy to do my bit to help. At college and school I participated in Open Evenings. I then proceeded to help on a 'Welcome to College Day,' speaking to students about the benefits of taking Sign Language as part of a Enrichment course and then advertised the student council whilst guiding new students.

One of my main strengths is Sign Language. I began a course with CACDP in year 12, sustaining a qualification of Level 1 in BSL. As a form of work experience, I will be helping students this year with their Level 1 studies. Overall, I am a committed and reliable student with passion about education. Taster days at universities (Warwick, Oxford and Birmingham) made me certain that university is the ideal environment for me to enhance my studies. I feel this course will lead me to success. After Higher Education, I plan to study psychology further and become a teacher of Psychology in colleges, hopefully giving students the chance to share my keen interest in Psychology.

Offers

With this beauty, i got an offer from all 5 of my choices, which were Birmingham, Leeds, Aston, Sheffield and Keele :)

Comments

The introduction is good, although it may be a bit long for a 4000 character PS. As for the rest of the PS, it is basically all extra-curricular stuff. While this stuff is good experience, it needs to be condensed to make room for more academics - either from school/college or from extra reading/experience.

There is a lot of talk about being a teacher - while psychology does lend itself well to teaching, the constant mention of it may make the admissions tutors feel the candidate is using the degree as a 'means to an end' and question why they are not applying to do teaching instead. By all means, relate classroom experience to psychological theories, such as memory/attention etc.

Some of the capitalisation is incorrect as well. Numbers should generally be written out as words, except 'Year X', which is acceptable as numbers.

Review

The dynamics of psychology affect our everyday life and behaviour, space needed here! Also, this is an example of a comma splice - separating two sentences with a comma instead of a full stop. It could be changed to 'which' this is what me so interested in the subject. From an early age, very cliched I often wondered why we act as we do and what affects us as we grow up. I always had a strong interest as to why people were so different even though genetically, everyone is similar. this needs to be more specific I have thoroughly enjoyed the subject, especially conformity. It fascinates overused word in PSs me as it portrays how strong peer pressure can be and I believe this is the main subject that deals with why we act the way we do. We conform everyday, offering a wide knowledge on behaviour. I am enjoying studying how the body and mind work and why certain things affect certain people. I find it useful on a personal basis as it can be used to explain many problems such as how illness is connected to stress. sentences flow better if they don't start with the same thing (in this case 'I')

For nine years I have aspired to be a teacher. After studying psychology, I am certain that is what I wish to do for the rest of my life. After a week's work experience at Mill Lodge primary school, no need to be specific - 'a local primary school' is fine I decided I did not want to teach such young students, however, it made me certain that I want to pursue a career in teaching. no need to mention what you DON'T want to do. Also, it's unlikely that with a psychology degree you would be able to train in secondary - it would most likely have to be sixth form My work experience increased my patience with children and gave me a wide overview of types of students. this doesn't relate to academic interest in psychology, so is unnecessary For a year and a half I have worked in Tesco, helping my patience and confidence, which was once lacking, avoid negatives in a PS has improved, showing a large expanse of people skills, with customers and staff members, giving me the experience of working as a team. see comments above about including teaching in the PS. The last sentence also has far too many commas and needs to be split up - proofreading is essential

Active participation in school life has also been rewarding. Whilst at Light Hall, no need to mention the name of the college I helped with projects run by the school. From February 2005 onwards, I was commended for supporting special needs pupils from Hazel Oak School again by helping with IT work. no need to be specific about the length of time. There are also links between special needs pupils and psychology that could be mentioned I assisted one teacher and one pupil in helping them create various IT projects. the tenses are mixed up - the 'from 2005' bit indicates it is ongoing, but the past tense suggests that the applicant no longer does it This boosted my enthusiasm to be a teacher. again with the teaching From a young age I played netball, playing for seven years in total in the position of goal keeper. this sentence is unnecessarily long In Year 11, I taught students in Years 7-9 keep the capitalisation consistent how to play to the best of their abilities. 'best of their abilities' isn't necessary However, I had to give up this hobby when starting college due to other commitments and desire to start extra courses. Regardless, I am determined to begin this hobby once again. I would say these last two sentences are unnecessary as well

I was part of the student council at Light Hall, additionally attending meetings with the head teacher and other senior staff. In Year 11, the 'Student Voice' was introduced where two students from each year, including myself, were selected to speak to the school's board of governors. At college, I joined the student council again. In my first year, I was nominated as a member of my form to be in the student council and I was then asked to attend a 'faculty meeting' every so often 'every so often' is rather informal with my head of faculty and other students. However, in my second year I think 'now' would be better here I am part of a small group of around ten students in the year who are the 'executive'. My role is environmental officer, something I am proud to be representing and passionate overused word in PSs about as it is a problem which should be 'that' is being discussed globally and I am happy to do my bit informal to help this sentence is rather long with no pauses. At college and school I participated in open evenings. I then proceeded to help on a 'welcome to college day,' speaking to students about the benefits of taking sign language as part of an enrichment course and then advertised the student council whilst guiding new students. another long sentence with no pauses

One of my main strengths is sign language. I began a course with CACDP avoid using uncommon acronyms first of all in Year 12, sustaining not quite the write word - 'gaining' is probably better a qualification of Level 1 in BSL. As a form of work experience, I will be helping students this year with their Level 1 studies. Overall, I am a committed and reliable student with passion overused in PSs about education. Taster days at universities (Warwick, Oxford and Birmingham) made me certain that university is the ideal environment for me to enhance my studies. avoid mentioning unis, as the ones not mentioned will feel put out and the others will have an indication of the unis you may apply to I feel this course will lead me to success. this sentence doesn't really add anything After higher education, I plan to study psychology further and become a teacher of psychology in colleges, hopefully giving students the chance to share my keen interest in psychology. The applicant should not mention anything new in their concluding paragraph (in this case, sign language). The conclusion should be about why you are interested in the course and what makes you a good candidate. It's not necessary to mention the taster days either