Personal Statement:Social Work 1

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Social Work Personal Statement

I have decided to take up the course in social work because firstly the subjects which I am doing sociology looks at people and society's problems, I have in this subject done work on family and at the moment doing religion, this has fascinated me to help people who are facing problems such as abuse in families. Secondly I have done personal study on this subject which I have enjoyed reading around in periodicals and journals which had fuelled my interest in gaining a more depth knowledge of working with different type of people and their problems. Thirdly I would like to take up a course which fascinates me and in which I will determined me too succeed and the challenge of working to deadlines

Whilst in the sixth form I have been involved in a scheme which aimed to provide children entering school with a low reading age, with the help their required to improve their reading levels. I also at in my private time tend to go to old people house who are disabled because one of my close relative is there also this house is opposite my house so I go in and talk to different people and talk or play games with them. This is another reason why I want to do this course because I have some experience of what I will be facing in this course, it won't be shock to me at first time round because I know in social work you get people who are hard to handle especially youngsters

My part time job which is shop assistant helped develop my understanding of responsibility and has given me increased confidence also enabled me to act initiatively with dealing with unexpected problems and has helped to develop my communication skills . Working with the children in school has improved my interpersonal skills so that I can now work with children who can be awkward sometimes without any problems

As an individual I like keeping fit which I have a gym in my house, I also like listening to music and going out with mates which provides me a different environment from college and work, this gives me an opportunity to make new friend and meet new people. I also in my part time help my younger brother and sister with their homework or I sometimes learn from my mum how to sew clothes

As an applicant, I will bring with me an enthusiasm and motivation for this subject. My ethics background and cultural awareness should allow me to become and integrated yet individual of a university member in an increasingly cosmopolitan society.

Comments

General Comments:

This statement does have some good points, especially explaining what experience they have.

However, a lot of work needs to be done to the structure, grammar and writing style. It does not read very well because words are used in the wrong place or context throughout. This statement will not demonstrate the level of English required for a degree. It should also be remembered that this is a professional statement, so words like 'mates' should not be used.

This sounds like an early draft of what could be a successful personal statement, but despite its content, universities may well not look beyond the mistakes in the writing.

Comments on the statement:

I have decided to take up - you are applying, you haven't got a place yet the course in social work because firstly the subjects which I am doing sociology looks at people and society's problems, I have in this subject done work on family and at the moment doing religion, this has fascinated me to help people who are facing problems such as abuse in families. Secondly I have done personal study on this subject which I have enjoyed reading around in periodicals and journals which had fuelled my interest in gaining a more depth knowledge of working with different type of people and their problems. Thirdly I would like to take up a course which fascinates me and in which I will determined me too succeed and the challenge of working to deadlines - studying social work is about being a social worker, and gaining a professional qualification. You need to show that you are dedicated to that, not applying for it because it fits with your current subjects

Whilst in the sixth form I have been involved in a scheme which aimed to provide children entering school with a low reading age, with the help their required to improve their reading levels. I also at in my private time tend to go to old people house who are disabled because one of my close relative is there also this house is opposite my house so I go in and talk to different people and talk or play games with them - this section is written very badly and doesn't make sense. It also doesn't matter where the house is, but you do need to say more about what you do there, and much more importantly, what you have got out of it.. This is another reason why I want to do this course because I have some experience of what I will be facing in this course, it won't be shock to me at first time round because I know in social work you get people who are hard to handle especially youngsters - this is a stereotype and it doesn't sound like you are speaking from experience. Be very careful with sweeping statements, don't say anything unless you can also justify/explain it. My part time job which is a shop assistant helped develop my understanding of responsibility and has given me increased confidence also enabled me to act initiatively - as far as I know, this isn't actually a word - with dealing with unexpected problems and has helped to develop my communication skills . Working with the children in school has improved my interpersonal skills so that I can now work with children who can be awkward sometimes without any problems - more depth is needed, an explanation of particular responsibilities you have had, how you have dealt with problems, what personal qualities you have that you can bring to social work.

As an individual I like keeping fit which is why I have a gym in my house, I also like listening to music and going out with mates which provides me a different environment from college and work, this gives me an opportunity to make new friend and meet new people. I also in my part time help my younger brother and sister with their homework or I sometimes learn from my mum how to sew clothes - just listing these isn't enough. Analysis and reflection is needed, relating back to social work.

As an applicant, I will bring with me an enthusiasm and motivation for this subject. My ethics background and cultural awareness should allow me to become and integrated yet individual of a university member in an increasingly cosmopolitan society. - this is another paragraph that is written badly. As well as the grammar mistakes, there needs to be more detail on why you would be an asset for the university. As it is the last paraphrah it also needs to round off appropriately and leave the reader with a lasting positive impression. ---