How much influence should your friends and family have on your relationship?

Last week lyrical_lie asked the community: 'Do you feel that your friends and families approval affects your relationship?' 

We spoke to relationship charity OnePlusOne and found out that, in general, approval of friends and family leads to happier and longer lasting relationships.

The TSR community had mixed views on how far friends and families should influence relationships. 

Here's what some of our members had to say: 

peanutbuttercup

Usually my family influences any potential relationships I may have, which is probably why I'm still single. For me it's a good thing though- my mum has the greatest influence on this, but that's because I know she knows exactly what's best for me and what I deserve, whereas I lack self esteem and so I don't always make the best decisions. 

I wouldn't want to get romantically involved with someone if I couldn't see myself marrying them somewhere along the line, so in the early stages I often think about whether my family would approve - I'm very family oriented so this is quite a big thing for me. It actually helps me ensure I get treated the way I deserve... more often than not my family are right!
 

The_Lonely_Goatherd

I can be - and have been, in the past - quite stubborn about these type of things but family and certain friends' approval is very important to me. Like if there is a relationship I would like to be in with someone, even if that person reciprocated my feelings, I would not be able to bring myself to have a relationship with them if there was no way on earth my family or friends would support it, and I trust their judgement more than my own in this particular case. 

But I guess it all depends on how strong the feelings involved are, doesn't it?

Dinaa

As a muslim girl, I'm not allowed a boyfriend so when I do have one it is totally secret. The secrecy can get really annoying because I'd rather be open and talk about whatever with my mum, but I just can't.

With my current boyfriend, obviously my parents are unaware, but it's frustrating being the 'complicated one' in the relationship. 

Whatever happens I do what is right and that is what makes me happy. They always say 'Parents know what is right/best for you', but let us be real now... No they don't.

Join the discussion

How much do your friends and family influence your relationships?

Do you think they are steering you in the right direction or just being meddlesome? 

Get involved with the discussion here and share your experiences. 

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