The Student Room Group

If you date someone with a 10 year + age gap, what could you possibly have in common?

I've seen a few posts where girls say they 'like older guys' etc. I've been thinking about this and I thought 'what could a guy in his 30s possibly have in common with someone 10 or more years younger than him?'

I'm in my 20s now and I think to myself when I get to my 30s would I want to date younger girls...yes and no - yes because they'll be hot and good-looking, but realistically what would we have in common? I mean, we'll have grown up in different eras, so we'll be brought up on different music, different tv shows etc.

I just don't see how it could work apart from the physical attraction really.
(edited 13 years ago)

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Reply 1
We are incredibly similar.

I don't care for the shows I was "brought up on" and neither does he. Our CURRENT interests and personalities are very similar. I love him so much. :smile:
Reply 2
I get on a lot better with people who are older than me, male and female. They're a lot more mature and you find those with similar interests. The conversations are far better and I prefer people with experience and wisdom to teach me, but at the same time they can learn from me, too.
In my experience, it's no different from dating a guy in my own age group. Either you're compatible or you're not - age doesn't really come into it at all.
(edited 13 years ago)
Music, films, TV, sports, occupation, traveling etc.
I've been seeing a guy who is ten years older and really, I hardly ever notice. Just because there's a big age gap doesnt mean we have nothing in common. We've seen alot of the same stuff, we talk about things we both havent seen, we love movies and I love older music a large amount. I know more about his music era than he does. We enjoy drinking in the pub, lying in bed watching stupid shows like south park. Really, the age doesnt bother me. Its other people who pass judgement.
Reply 6
Errr we all listen to a huge variety of music, like the same tv shows, gigs, going to pubs, could have similar jobs, be academics.... blah blah blah... it is the same as if you were going out with someone your own age.

Plus boys (and men) are immaturer than girls so it is natural to want to date an older one. And men are in their prime alt older than girls are imo anyway.
Reply 7
This really depends on the people involved. Mostly couples will be of a similar age. Some age gap relationships will be about a guy not being able to cope with a mature woman or a girl looking for a father figure or a guy for a mother figure etc. All relationships have their shady aspects and we could pick holes in any coupling but in the end it comes down to the people involved and how the feel about each other.
Reply 8
I've been with my fiance for 4 years now and we have a 10year 5month age gap. We have more in common than anyone in my age group has with me. I cant think of anything we don't share, we're actually getting married next year. I think your being very closed minded if you think there would be nothing in common because thats just untrue.
Reply 9
cheer_up_love
In my experience, it's no different from dating a guy in my own age group. Either you're compatible or you're not - age doesn't really come into it at all.


Ok that makes sense :-) So I should still be able to get 17/18 year old when I'm in my 30s? Cool.
Reply 10
Relationships aren't just based on common interests! You could say that different ends of the spectrum of people in a small age group has vastly different interests! It's also to do with sense of humour, attraction and how people generally get on. However, I do know guys and girls that are 28+ and we really do have things in common...tv programmes, music, how we like to spend our time and sense of humour!
member101
I get on a lot better with people who are older than me, male and female. They're a lot more mature and you find those with similar interests. The conversations are far better and I prefer people with experience and wisdom to teach me, but at the same time they can learn from me, too.


This. :smile:
Reply 12
What connects a 20 year old girl and 30 year old man?

They both love HER body.
ripellino
This really depends on the people involved. Mostly couples will be of a similar age. Some age gap relationships will be about a guy not being able to cope with a mature woman or a girl looking for a father figure or a guy for a mother figure etc. All relationships have their shady aspects and we could pick holes in any coupling but in the end it comes down to the people involved and how the feel about each other.


I disagree with the statement in bold. This insinuates that people in relationships with older people have emotional or psychological problems. Find me supporting evidence to back this statemement and I will maybe consider this idea. I did read that you said 'some' relationships but I am yet to find any evidence of this.
Reply 14
Moa
What connects a 20 year old girl and 30 year old man?

They both love HER body.


A woman, you mean.
Reply 15
I'm nearing 21. He's nearing 40.

We both like outdoorsy stuff - camping, travelling, fishing, walking, climbing etc
We cook togther (and follow a pretty similar diet/lifestyle). We watch movies. We get nekkid :awesome:. We're both wanting kids (although i won't yet!)

I have very little shared interests with the average 20/21 male who is 'living for the weekend' and into going out 'with the lads'. :yucky:
Reply 16
jellybeansx
I disagree with the statement in bold. This insinuates that people in relationships with older people have emotional or psychological problems. Find me supporting evidence to back this statemement and I will maybe consider this idea. I did read that you said 'some' relationships but I am yet to find any evidence of this.


If you read what I said I say "some" relationships of this nature are to do with psychological quirks. However I also say that we all have those and age gap relationship or not we all fall for and settle with that someone who is able to satisfy that which we lack in someway.

I like older men myself. Honestly just re-read what I said before getting on your high horse.
Reply 17
That's a big age gap but if people click then it's fine.
Believe it or not, the interests I have are in things which have been interesting for more than a 10 year period whilst I was growing up. I don't understand why there's any reason for me not to have things in common with people of different ages. We wouldn't have grown up with the same childhood cartoons but I think I can just about cope with that.
Reply 19
Exactly the same things you have in common with someone with less of a disparity between ages.

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