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Uni has been rubbish so far. Don't know whether to stay.

I've been in uni for 13 weeks now, just about to go home for Christmas but so far it's been rubbish. I've made some really good friends and enjoy nights out and shopping but it's mainly the course that I don't enjoy and also uni life, how it is.

My course is so rubbish. The first two weeks were good, we had tutorials and meetings and I thought I would really enjoy it but ever since then I've only haf 4 lectures a week and have found it really hard to settle into the course. I'm not interested in the slightest in what I'm studying.

My accommodation situation is rubbish as well. I don't like my flat at all, I live with 2 guys and a girl and the girl is never here so I basically feel like I live on my own. I get invited to go on nights out with girls I know from other flats, and go shopping with them sometimes but I still feel like I'm on my own... Everybody seems to go round in pairs or threes.

I feel like I've done everything wrong this year, wrong accommodation, haven't joined any societies or clubs and haven't got into the course at all. The structure of the course is really bad and I'm struggling so much.

I don't know whether I should come back after Christmas and give it more of a go with the course, but I'll still be left out and on my own most of the time which is what is getting to me the most.

I love the city and the freedom but I think I would much rather study from home, or even live in halls but in the same city as I live, in a better uni with a much better course.

I don't think I can actually bring myself to leave though however much I hate it, I don't know how my family would react and whether I would want to. I'd also have to pay all the halls bills and probably the tuition fees still :/

I know I might like it by the end of the year but if I don't I've wasted a whole year doing a cours I hate and constantly feeling down. I just want to start again!

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Reply 1
You seem to enjoy it for the most part,and the things you dont really like can all be changed.
We all know people who dont socialise with people in their own hall/flat , but do socialise with others, there is nothing wrong with that and you shouldnt feel alone in doing so.. many people do it. You get invited out, you go out, etc .. the more you go out the more you will get invited.
It is not too late to join socieities and make friends, just have a quick chat or email to a few you are interested and see what can be done.

On one hand i would say that you should stay, its only been 13 weeks out of a whole year .. it will get better if you think about the points above and others.

but on the other hand, i wouldnt really advise someone to stay at uni if they dont like their course, which seems to be your main concern.
Not liking your course can lead to less motivation, less interest in the subject so less work done.. work standards fall and you fail a degree or come out with a 2.2 or worse. This can happen.. or you do fine but end up feeling like you do now for 3 years.

So, if you REALLY dont like your course that much, and see no way of it improving, then maybe you should get out now.. but if its not thaaat bad then i'd advise waiting a little longer.
Reply 2
Definitely go back and its never too late to societies just e-mail those that interest you and go a long to the next meeting and take it from there with the girls in the other flats try to make as much effort as possible but friendships take a while to come. As for your course talk to your supervisor about your concerns in your course and inquire whether you could transfer into one you would enjoy as a first or second year next year.
Original post by BabyGirl92
I love the city and the freedom but I think I would much rather study from home


Would this be an option, or do you live too far away?
(edited 13 years ago)
Reply 4
Original post by Tommyjw
You seem to enjoy it for the most part,and the things you dont really like can all be changed.
We all know people who dont socialise with people in their own hall/flat , but do socialise with others, there is nothing wrong with that and you shouldnt feel alone in doing so.. many people do it. You get invited out, you go out, etc .. the more you go out the more you will get invited.
It is not too late to join socieities and make friends, just have a quick chat or email to a few you are interested and see what can be done.

On one hand i would say that you should stay, its only been 13 weeks out of a whole year .. it will get better if you think about the points above and others.

but on the other hand, i wouldnt really advise someone to stay at uni if they dont like their course, which seems to be your main concern.
Not liking your course can lead to less motivation, less interest in the subject so less work done.. work standards fall and you fail a degree or come out with a 2.2 or worse. This can happen.. or you do fine but end up feeling like you do now for 3 years.

So, if you REALLY dont like your course that much, and see no way of it improving, then maybe you should get out now.. but if its not thaaat bad then i'd advise waiting a little longer.


Wow thanks for the nice reply :smile:

I do want to stay and give it a go, I wanted to drop out after a month but decided to stay and give the course a go.

People who I'm friends with on the course really like it but I just don't. We got our module handbooks at the start of the term, get told what out coursework is and go to lectures and then we're left by ourselves to complete the coursework.

I don't feel involved with the course at all! There's so little contact time and it's nothing like I thought uni would be. Gonna talk it over with my parents when I go home. I know they'll talk me out of it but I don't want to hate my course for the next 3 years. I have thought of transferring and staying here but I don't think it's possible in the first year and I don't want to start a degree here again next year because then it'll be another year before I can go home then!

And I actually think I would only miss one person out of everybody I've met :/ It sounds bad saying that nobody has really made an impression on me!
Reply 5
Original post by TheSownRose
Would this be an option, or do you like too far away?


It's not an option in this uni :/ Home is an hour 20 minutes away in the car but I wouldn't wanna drive here everyday and it's 2 hours on the train. There's a decent uni at home which I had an offer from last year so I could try and get in there, the course there is highly rated and looks so much better than the one I'm doing here. Just that where I live is a really dull place, and this city is amazing. I wouldn't mind being here for 3 years just not the way I feel now.
Reply 6
Quite a lot of people are dropping out or considering at this time. I did it two years ago. I'd say if you absolutely cannot bare it then leave, its not worth taking your sanity. However if you feel you can continue with it then I'd say finish the year and possibly take a gap year if you still are not sure after that. The course may pick up and you'll have to pay for it either way!
Reply 7
Original post by greenpeas
Definitely go back and its never too late to societies just e-mail those that interest you and go a long to the next meeting and take it from there with the girls in the other flats try to make as much effort as possible but friendships take a while to come. As for your course talk to your supervisor about your concerns in your course and inquire whether you could transfer into one you would enjoy as a first or second year next year.


There isn't really any that interest me. I'm doing First Aid at the moment but that doesn't properly start until February, and it's not like a proper society where everybody goes out. I wanted to join the trampoline club but it's filled up and there's nothing else I really wanna do.. the societies are all sports clubs or religion etc.

I want to start from the start next year and make new friends but the thought of being a year behind and away from home doesn't sound nice. I just want to get it out of the way really.
Reply 8
Original post by barrze
Quite a lot of people are dropping out or considering at this time. I did it two years ago. I'd say if you absolutely cannot bare it then leave, its not worth taking your sanity. However if you feel you can continue with it then I'd say finish the year and possibly take a gap year if you still are not sure after that. The course may pick up and you'll have to pay for it either way!


I know, I was thinking about suspending the course. I know someone who did it.
I just want a fresh start. This uni has rubbish support, the students union is awful and my accommodation situation is unbearable at times too.

I really don't think it's going to pick up :/ I'm so un interested and un motivated. I've tried to like it I really have but it's just really hard.
Original post by BabyGirl92
It's not an option in this uni :/ Home is an hour 20 minutes away in the car but I wouldn't wanna drive here everyday and it's 2 hours on the train. There's a decent uni at home which I had an offer from last year so I could try and get in there, the course there is highly rated and looks so much better than the one I'm doing here. Just that where I live is a really dull place, and this city is amazing. I wouldn't mind being here for 3 years just not the way I feel now.


Aw man, I really wish you'd quoted me after I'd changed 'like' to 'live'. :lol:

That's fair enough - are you actually in every day, though, or could you tolerate it for few days?

Have you contacted the uni at home to ask about the possibility of transferring/going back to first year there?
Reply 10
Original post by TheSownRose
Aw man, I really wish you'd quoted me after I'd changed 'like' to 'live'. :lol:

That's fair enough - are you actually in every day, though, or could you tolerate it for few days?

Have you contacted the uni at home to ask about the possibility of transferring/going back to first year there?


I've been in three days a week this semester, an hour on monday, 3 hours thursday and four hours on friday. It might change next semester but I think it's going to be less hours. No I haven't contacted them yet, I'm gonna talk it over with my family when I get home tomorrow and see what my options are. I just don't want to be a 'drop-out' I'm worried what people at home will think of me!
Hey don't worry about it. Your parents won't be mad if you drop out. My brother dropped out as he was really not into the course and hated where he was and my Mum just encouraged him to make better choices in the future. I'd say stick it out for a few weeks after Christmas and then make a final decision. Good luck! It's not fun being unhappy about the future I know. No point being unhappy and wasting 3 years. :smile: May I ask what course you're doing?
Reply 12
Original post by chlobofro
Hey don't worry about it. Your parents won't be mad if you drop out. My brother dropped out as he was really not into the course and hated where he was and my Mum just encouraged him to make better choices in the future. I'd say stick it out for a few weeks after Christmas and then make a final decision. Good luck! It's not fun being unhappy about the future I know. No point being unhappy and wasting 3 years. :smile: May I ask what course you're doing?


I'm doing Psychology. It was a last minute choice of course (I was going to do Sociology but had doubts about career options).

I think I chose the wrong course, I didn't prepare for it at all and expected much more from the course, it's just really dull! I came to uni for the course and it's not satisfied me at all.

I really want to do Psychology with Sociology because I really enjoy Sociology but doing it on its own doesnt open many doors I feel, but they don't do it at this university :/

However doing Psychology in the uni at home seems much more exciting. I've only ever heard good things about the course and I am interested in Psychology now that I've started just can't stand doing it here!
Original post by BabyGirl92
I'm doing Psychology. It was a last minute choice of course (I was going to do Sociology but had doubts about career options).

I think I chose the wrong course, I didn't prepare for it at all and expected much more from the course, it's just really dull! I came to uni for the course and it's not satisfied me at all.

I really want to do Psychology with Sociology because I really enjoy Sociology but doing it on its own doesnt open many doors I feel, but they don't do it at this university :/

However doing Psychology in the uni at home seems much more exciting. I've only ever heard good things about the course and I am interested in Psychology now that I've started just can't stand doing it here!


What appeals about the home course that your current uni is missing?
Reply 14
Original post by TheSownRose
What appeals about the home course that your current uni is missing?


It sounds mad but they have a test every week on SPSS and research methods which actually counts towards your final mark for the module so id be so much more motivated to do well. They also have a Psychology society which arranges nights out and it just seems so much more friendlier. We don't even have January exams so I have nothing to focus on over the next 5 weeks. In my course they've just given us our coursework titles and left us to it there's no guidance at all!
Original post by BabyGirl92
I'm doing Psychology. It was a last minute choice of course (I was going to do Sociology but had doubts about career options).

I think I chose the wrong course, I didn't prepare for it at all and expected much more from the course, it's just really dull! I came to uni for the course and it's not satisfied me at all.

I really want to do Psychology with Sociology because I really enjoy Sociology but doing it on its own doesnt open many doors I feel, but they don't do it at this university :/

However doing Psychology in the uni at home seems much more exciting. I've only ever heard good things about the course and I am interested in Psychology now that I've started just can't stand doing it here!


Ahhh I really think you should get in contact with this Uni at home.. it sounds far more suited to you!
Personally I've heard Psychology degrees are okay but not what they are cracked up to be unless you genuinely love the subject.
Talk to someone in careers about it. Seems like you just stumbled into Uni with no real guidance. :frown:
Original post by BabyGirl92
It sounds mad but they have a test every week on SPSS and research methods which actually counts towards your final mark for the module so id be so much more motivated to do well. They also have a Psychology society which arranges nights out and it just seems so much more friendlier. We don't even have January exams so I have nothing to focus on over the next 5 weeks. In my course they've just given us our coursework titles and left us to it there's no guidance at all!


How much do you think having these things would enhance your view of a degree?
Reply 17
Hi!

When I went to uni I was so homesick! I was independent, but I never realised how much I would miss my friends/family.

What you're feeling isn't unusual at all, and I can relate!

I hated my flat and accommodation. I didn't know that there was the opportunity to move flats etc. And I clung onto my one friend's friends because I wasn't making any of my own!

If you don't feel like the university is doing itself justice, think about transferring somewhere else for second year. As someone has already mentioned - you will have to pay for this year, so if you can bear to finish it, do.

I found personally that getting part-time work helped me find my own group of friends, people I wouldn't have otherwise met - at the opposing university and mature students, locals. Everything!

I worked in a nightclub. It meant that I still got to socialise and go out- got free entry and free drinks when I wasn't working but met a load of fun, up-for-a-laugh people while earning money!

Speak to your tutor about your course. I went to mine and said that I wanted to change course, he kept telling me every time I went (coz I went a good few times and was too lazy/depressed to do anything about it) to stick it out. And I did. I didn't find my course interesting but actually I didn't know what else I wanted to study.

But you might find that there is something you want to study which is different/better suited. Someone I knew in first year left Sheffield to go to Reading to do the same course, because she thought her degree was just about colouring in maps at Sheffield and there wasn't enough actual learning happening.

Also, some courses don't require a lot of contact time. My degree was in English and Linguistics and I would say I had about 6-7 contact hours a week. So I spent more time at work! (about 30 hours a week). Some courses are just more reading based rather than lecture.

But if it's not your cuppa, there's no pressure to stay. Two out of my group of 10 friends from back home dropped out. And I know loads more that changed courses and went to different unis. It's fine to change your mind and is probably a lot more common than you think!!!
Babygirls you wont loose your loan and you might save money if you move to the uni near home.
It sounds like your week is quite empty- could you get a part time job? or volunteer? or try something new like the uni play? Also perhaps this is a bit obvious but are you keeping up with the coursework? Do the other psychology students feel as you do? If so then a little group could try and persuade the tutor to at least give you an extra tutorial weekly.
Sometimes when you go back the second term something gels so I'm thinking don't give up yet but develop a plan B.
Reply 19
Original post by TheSownRose
How much do you think having these things would enhance your view of a degree?


I don't know really I just feel like in that uni people are so much more involved with the degree and their school and that the staff really care about them. I just feel like a number here tbh :/

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