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Guys, do you ever act cold towards a girl you fancy when other people are around?

Anonymous #1

There's a guy I know at uni (I don't know him that well) and when I bump into him when we're on our own, he's really friendly and quite flirty and I get the impression that he fancies me. However, when there's a group of us (like if we're in lectures or having lunch), then he acts quite distant and doesn't talk to me much, but still talks to everyone else normally. Do any of you do this? If so, why? Is it because you don't want the group of people to gossip?

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Reply 1

Anonymous #2

yeah I do this, and as a result she's now into my housemate instead!

Nope.

Cold? No. Less flirty? Yes.

Reply 4

Anonymous #1

Original post by xxxchrisxxx

Cold? No. Less flirty? Yes.

I suppose less flirty is also more cold. Why do you do this?

Reply 5

Anonymous #3

I'm in a scarily similar situation, from the other side. Not entirely sure why I do it, haha

I think you make a good point with the not wanting other people to talk, because I don't really like the idea that other people know. Makes me feel like they've got something on me, if that makes any sense. I THINK it's because I don't want her to feel overwhelmed, I keep thinking I could be annoying her.

I know I should just ask her out properly, but I can't really think of any words when it comes to it. I keep missing these perfect opportunities, stupid stuff gets in the way (mainly other people), and I'm normally really good with words. That's what makes it so frustrating. Still, she's the only person I know who leaves me speechless, so I guess that's something!

What do you mean by cold, though?

Reply 6

xxxchrisxxx

Original post by Anonymous

I suppose less flirty is also more cold. Why do you do this?

Flirtation for me is a bit of a private thing. Not sure I'd be comfortable doing it with all and sundry present, especially if I really like the girl.

But I wouldn't be 'cold' towards her or semi-ignore her.

Reply 7

channy

Yes, usually because I'm scared ****less. Unless I'm drunk, then I'm actually ****ting.

Reply 8

JosieMcfeene

I friggin' hate it when guys do this ¬¬

Reply 9

humbugsftw

It confuses me when guys do this. >.>

Reply 10

Anonymous #4

I'm male and the girl I like is doing this to me, and has been for the past 2 months. It's so unbelievably annoying and confusing - I have no idea if she likes me because of it. When we're alone we get on really well - as soon as others are in the room with us, it all changes. :frown:

Reply 11

BackDoorEntry

Not cold, but as said before less flirty.

Unless I'm sure the feeling is mutual, flirtation stays private :tongue:

i tend to do this!

Original post by Anonymous

I'm a girl and I do this to the guy I like, mainly because I'm scared he doesn't feel the same and all my friends know I like him, so if we're in a group and I pay him too much attention, my friends usually laugh or make weird faces, which makes me feel embarrassed! She probably likes you!

Reply 14

Anonymous #5

Forgot to add that the guy I like acts the same way with me - I'm guessing he might like me too? But we're both quite shy.

Reply 15

Don John

Original post by humbugsftw

It confuses me when guys do this. >.>

Original post by JosieMcfeene

I friggin' hate it when guys do this ¬¬

What should we do instead then?

Reply 16

amitai

Original post by xxxchrisxxx

then what if you are WITH the girl? :confused:

(edited 13 years ago)

Reply 17

xxxchrisxxx

Original post by amitai

then what if you are WITH the girl? my boyfriend (and he's the one always reminding me that we are in a "proper" relationship) becomes cold and detached when we are with other people...not in general, only with some guys we both know because they are erasmus, like the two us...so this is freaking annoying, and I've started to think that he's ashamed of being with me in public, but when i try to tell him, he (ofcoursssse) denied everything... :confused:

I think that's something only your bf can answer.