My guy friend of 5 years has broke my heart & treated me like cr*p.. advice please?

As faras I understood, you guys aren't in a proper relationship.

Sex doesn't equal love. He can love you and still have sex with another girl.

It seems to me that he ahs needs and because you don't want a relationship, he sees no reason why not to satisfy the needs.

If you guys were in a proper relationship then I'd understand you being upset. But in this situation he seems to be in the right.

im to know that he's upset me like this but i literally don't want him touching me. What do you think he's doing? Does he have feelings for me, or has he just been playing me along?

ok lemme get a few things clear

do you want a relationship from him? told him?
how far are you guys?

and he doesn't have to tell you who he is shagging, and for men sex=/= love

Sounds as if he keeps kissing you in the hope he can get you into bed. Make it clear that you will only sleep with him if you are an actual couple, if you don;t want him coming onto you then tell him. Maybe you both need to seriously talk over about what you both want. Even if you want a relationship he needs to ditch this other girl.

well done for spurning his advances... you get what you give

I made that clear att the time. We talked it over, and he just said straight out that he doesn’t want a LDR. I said I wanted a r-ship. Why does he need to ditch he

.

Yep i've told him. He doesnt want a LDR.
We're 3hours apart. He works weekends though, and i'm studying an intense course so can't get home often.

I made that clear att the time. We talked it over, and he just said straight out that he doesn’t want a LDR. I said I wanted a r-ship. Why does he need to ditch her?

Oh well excuse me for not wanting to sleep with someone that I’m not in a relationship with/ with someone that doesn’t want a r-ship with me for my first time.

Well if he doesn't want to go out with you then he's feel to keep seeing this other girl, but if he wants you in return then he can't carry on with this other girl, but it seems clear he don't want you.

ok here goes;

he may be true in that he loves you but situation makes it awkward to be together

therefore he doesn't want to commit because it means losing his freedom and it's not like you will meet often.

and to add you guys were never a couple in the sense that, you never said "we are exclusive"

there

sorted?

He was sleeping with her before he made a proper attempt at sleeping with me.

Despite what he said because he doesn't want a LDR with me, and its not even that far, i don't feel like he really does feel the way he says he does. If he liked me enough he'd put up with the distance.

I don't care that he's sleeping with her, its him sleeping with her at uni... not mentioning it to me... then trying to sleep with me at home. Its like he just wants to have someone 'waiting' for him at home, while still having someone at uni.

How have i cock teased him? He doesn't want a r-ship, i am a virgin and therefore i don't want to lose it on a ONS, i want to be in a r-ship where i know the guy really does care about me. He knows this.

well then he obviously, as you say wants you at home and her away, if you don't want that then that's fine but i still don't think he's in the wrong. If you were doing what you say you do to him, to me, i'd probably make a move aswell because your actions imply you want a fwb type deal.

Yeah.. but i'm not bothered that he's seeing her. What bothers me is that he thought it was perfectly okay to be in a FwB thing with her, then come home and try and sleep with me. Had i slept with him then it probably would have become a regular thing where whenever i was home we'd get together. So basically he would've ended up shagging her at uni and me at home. She's basically some random he met at uni last year, me and have have been very good friends for 5 years... i dont care if that how he wants to treat her.. but i can't believe he'd treat me that way

Oh well excuse me for not wanting to sleep with someone that I’m not in a relationship with/ with someone that doesn’t want a r-ship with me for my first time.

Yeah.. but i'm not bothered that he's seeing her. What bothers me is that he thought it was perfectly okay to be in a FwB thing with her, then come home and try and sleep with me. Had i slept with him then it probably would have become a regular thing where whenever i was home we'd get together. So basically he would've ended up shagging her at uni and me at home. She's basically some random he met at uni last year, me and have have been very good friends for 5 years... i dont care if that how he wants to treat her.. but i can't believe he'd treat me that way

No i've never implied i want a FwB type deal... hence i've never slept with him. I didn't know he didn't want a LDR until that night he tried to sleep with me.

"A week after said text i went home, and we very nearly slept together (i said no). He said that he loves me (i didnt say it back) and that it felt so right, i'm his best friend from home, he misses me so much blah blah blah. He said he doesn't want a LDR though.

Since then i've reduced contact to see if he'd contact me first, but he rarely does. I'd had enough putting the majority of the effort in to talk to him, and this lead to us speaking maybe once a week, instead of daily."

If he's made a pass at you and declared his love, and you have rejected both of these pretty big gestures, I'd say you shouldn't be surprised if he doesn't want to speak to you. Also, you are a cock tease.

Hang on... people are getting off topic. I don't care that he has a FWB. What bothers me is that he thought it perfectly okay to get into a FwB thing with me at home, and have another FwB at uni. We've been friends for 5 years, and hence i can't believe he thinks its okay to treat me this way... and clearly doesnt care that when said FwB finished we'd struggle to keep up our friendship. He said to one of our other friends that you can't be friends after a r-ship... well FwB with a close friend is a type of r-ship in my eyes... we were talking every day, and would have been getting together when at home.