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Trouble holding it back during sex, advice?

Keep anon please.
Im a guy, 19, and ive only had 4 sexual partners.
Ive been with my gf about 2 months and its all going well. The problem is, im stupidly attracted to her. My ex i think was equally good looking and i was very attracted to her too though/
The problem with my current gf is i keep finishing after only 5 minutes. The only times ive lasted longer is if im drunk, or already had sex not too long before and we were going for round 2. Or if i have a **** a couple of hours before i see her. Think we have had sex around 12 times now.

We often have a lot of foreplay first, we give eachother oral which obviously is a massive turn on. Shes also very tight because she has quite a small frame (5ft 5ish?) and she recently lost her virginity to me.

Sounds lol worthy but ive thought about very unpleasent things during sex to try and kill my mood abit but it doesnt really works and takes so much concentration to maintain these images.

Any advice on this? it really doesnt help that she is very tight either. And like i said ive never had this problem before.

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Reply 1
Just masterbate and have sexual intercourse often. You'll eventually become numb to even the most instense sexual emotion.
open your gills and breathe man!!!
**** regurs?

Also give her lots of oral sex and foreplay but don't take. That way she will be really close and be able to meet you half way. Though i still think ****ing is the plan.
Reply 4
I know where you're coming from man, I'm exactly the same. I think it's largely due to our age/excitement. Have you tried the "durex performa" condom?.. It contains a gel that slightly numbs the penis - ive lasted a lot longer using them. Also, when/if you masterbate don't try and get to climax as quick as poss - throughout teen years your body becomes programmed to ejaculate as quick as poss due to us being horny chronic compulsive ****ers.. so try and get out of that mindset.

good luck.
Reply 5
Whenever you feel your physical excitement building, then attempt to reduce stimulation by slowing it down, changing the angle, or in extreme circumstances giving yourself a breather by changing position. Obviously don't overdo this, otherwise you will lose your hard on (/fail).

If you keep monitoring your own excitation levels and adjust the action accordingly, you can pretty much carry on indefinitely.
Reply 6
Original post by Anonymous
Keep anon please.
Im a guy, 19, and ive only had 4 sexual partners.
Ive been with my gf about 2 months and its all going well. The problem is, im stupidly attracted to her. My ex i think was equally good looking and i was very attracted to her too though/
The problem with my current gf is i keep finishing after only 5 minutes. The only times ive lasted longer is if im drunk, or already had sex not too long before and we were going for round 2. Or if i have a **** a couple of hours before i see her. Think we have had sex around 12 times now.

We often have a lot of foreplay first, we give eachother oral which obviously is a massive turn on. Shes also very tight because she has quite a small frame (5ft 5ish?) and she recently lost her virginity to me.

Sounds lol worthy but ive thought about very unpleasent things during sex to try and kill my mood abit but it doesnt really works and takes so much concentration to maintain these images.

Any advice on this? it really doesnt help that she is very tight either. And like i said ive never had this problem before.


That has worked for me in the past, but it's best not to answertruthfully if they ask what's going through your mind at that current moment :P
Original post by grth
That has worked for me in the past, but it's best not to answertruthfully if they ask what's going through your mind at that current moment :P


They don't have to be unpleasant, but just non-sexy. Like running through the safety checks and drills that you do before flying a plane apparently work.
Reply 8
Original post by grth
That has worked for me in the past, but it's best not to answertruthfully if they ask what's going through your mind at that current moment :P


Ive gone as far as to picture starving African children, which worked well for about a minute before the image swiftly changed to picturing my girlfriends gash, by which time there was no going back :/
Reply 9
Original post by Anonymous
Ive gone as far as to picture starving African children, which worked well for about a minute before the image swiftly changed to picturing my girlfriends gash, by which time there was no going back :/


Hahaha what a transition.
Reply 10
Original post by Reflexive
Hahaha what a transition.


I just nearly choked on my tea when I read it too :eek:
Reply 11
Original post by Anonymous
Ive gone as far as to picture starving African children, which worked well for about a minute before the image swiftly changed to picturing my girlfriends gash, by which time there was no going back :/


mate just think about Margaret Thatcher naked. Or Angela merkel in a bikini, that's sure to delay you for a bit :awesome:
Original post by py0alb
Whenever you feel your physical excitement building, then attempt to reduce stimulation by slowing it down, changing the angle, or in extreme circumstances giving yourself a breather by changing position. Obviously don't overdo this, otherwise you will lose your hard on (/fail).

If you keep monitoring your own excitation levels and adjust the action accordingly, you can pretty much carry on indefinitely.


Pretty much the best advice you're gonna get ^^
Durex performa condoms and lube, helps numb things down a bit.
Reply 14
Put toothpaste on your cock before you get into the sexual tings... Obviously make sure u wash it off before u start nailing her.. Leave it on for like ten mins before she comes over... It burns like **** and totally kills all feelings in your equipment
Original post by Anonymous
Keep anon please.
Im a guy, 19, and ive only had 4 sexual partners.
Ive been with my gf about 2 months and its all going well. The problem is, im stupidly attracted to her. My ex i think was equally good looking and i was very attracted to her too though/
The problem with my current gf is i keep finishing after only 5 minutes. The only times ive lasted longer is if im drunk, or already had sex not too long before and we were going for round 2. Or if i have a **** a couple of hours before i see her. Think we have had sex around 12 times now.

We often have a lot of foreplay first, we give eachother oral which obviously is a massive turn on. Shes also very tight because she has quite a small frame (5ft 5ish?) and she recently lost her virginity to me.

Sounds lol worthy but ive thought about very unpleasent things during sex to try and kill my mood abit but it doesnt really works and takes so much concentration to maintain these images.

Any advice on this? it really doesnt help that she is very tight either. And like i said ive never had this problem before.


firstly - 19 and ONLY had 4 sexual partners, very smooth that.

secondly, you can't do much really to change the length of time, there is a certain type of condom on the market that contains something that lengthen the time under the cover but its very hard to get hold off since most guys kept buying them
Reply 16
Original post by Reflexive
Hahaha what a transition.


I know, my mind just isnt strong enough to maintain such disturbing images.

Original post by TheQuickestSilver
Durex performa condoms and lube, helps numb things down a bit.


She's on the pill so i dont really want to use a condom...

Original post by big-boss-91
firstly - 19 and ONLY had 4 sexual partners, very smooth that.

secondly, you can't do much really to change the length of time, there is a certain type of condom on the market that contains something that lengthen the time under the cover but its very hard to get hold off since most guys kept buying them


Well 4 isnt that much, i know guys at the 10+ mark, so thats why i said only.
Wear 2 condoms? One kills alot of the sensation for me :lol:
Breathe deeper. That is, inhale for ~10s, hold for 1s, exhale for ~7s. Short breaths or just not breathing at all are sure-fire ways for..ahem..quick firing.

Work for her pleasure, not your own. If you bring her to orgasm way before you even engage in penetration, it can release a lot of pressure on yourself to please her, knowing she'll be satisfied either way.

Practice kegel excercises. Those are the muscles that control ejaculation, urination, etc. Imagine you're trying to cut off mid-pee. Hold that muscle position for 10 seconds, release, and repeat. That'll help strengthen the muscles, and give you more control over when you orgasm.

Oh and get into a decent mindset with masturbation, work for at least 15 minutes instead of bashing out in a few minutes, untraining your body to shoot off quickly is probably the most reliable method.

Also, changing position alot, stopping starting, etc, while it can be effective for yourself, it can leave her frustrated as hell. Use it more as a last-resort than a regular bailout from orgasm.

And ofcourse, you can always go in for 2nds :biggrin:
(edited 13 years ago)
just think "sonia from eastenders... sonia from eastenders... sonia from eastenders..."

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