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How to tell people you don't want to join Secret Santa with them?

I hate surprises and am very bad at buying gifts for people ... such that no one buys me things I haven't specifically asked for and, when I ask "What do you want for Christmas?", people actually give me an answer.

A lot of my friends have set up a 'Secret Santa', and have asked me if I want to join them for it. I most definitely do not, but don't know how to tell them this. They know I celebrate Christmas, because they asked me to join them on a Christmas meal tomorrow, but it's the last day of Hannukah so I couldn't ... which then led to a discussion about whether I was Jewish, where I said my mother's family is but my father's family is Christmas, so I do both Hannukah and Christmas. So, "I don't celebrate Christmas" isn't going to work.

So, how can I tell my friends that I don't want to join Secret Santa with them, without upsetting them or telling them I hate surprises (because it's part of a disorder I keep secret from almost everyone, and it would lead to another discussion)?
"I don't want to join Secret Santa with you" - Can you not talk?
Reply 2
Avatar for EnVogue
EnVogue
13
Pick your own name :smile:
Reply 3
Avatar for ShakeyJJ
ShakeyJJ
10
When I was in school and my close circle of friends wanted to do secret santa, I simply said I didn't want to participate. Now of course you get the odd friend who just loves to moan and will say "Fine then, be a scrooge," but just reason this with "It is one less present to buy, and clearly with a response like that you wouldn't want to buy me a present anyway."

Worked like a charm!
Reply 4
Avatar for laut_biru
laut_biru
Claim you're struggling a bit for money this year, and need to use what you have for family?
Reply 5
Avatar for abbii
abbii
11
you have no money
you wont be there on the day they give them to each other
"I've got no monies/We're visiting my family in place X/I'm **** at buying presents"? :dontknow:

But i don't get why you don't like surprises. I truly love them.
Reply 7
Avatar for Anonymous #1
Anonymous #1
OP
Money problems won't work - I own a flat whilst they get by on £30 a week in halls.
"No, I can't because I've already bought you all gifts!". :p:
Reply 9
Avatar for Aurora.
Aurora.
14
Original post by Anonymous
Money problems won't work - I own a flat whilst they get by on £30 a week in halls.


In that case maybe you could claim you've already got something for each of them? Then just go out and buy something silly and small that you can't really go wrong with, like some socks or something.

But if they're your friends, it should be okay just to say you've never really liked doing Secret Santa and you hope it won't be too big a deal.
I always didn't like it because it ended up in tears at secondary school when one person bought a speaker system and recieved a photo frame in return. Say it hasn't worked out well for you in the past so you'd rather watch not participate!

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