Boyfriend going his work xmas party alone, is it wrong that im upset?

Some people want to spend it schmoozing with work mates rather than having to hold their Gfs hand all night.

especially if its going to be a lot of work banter all night

Let the man have his space...or don't you trust him? Do you think his going to get someone's number or are you scared that he will have a good time without you and things wont be the same?

Clingy to the max, lord above.

I find it amusing that most of the girls are saying he's in the wrong whereas the guys think it's fine!

I'm gonna go with the guys though - there's nothing wrong with wanting to keep different friendships/ relationships separate every now and then. If he works with a load of guys and him and his workmates are really close then he might not want to have to spend the evening holding your hand and making you feel better because you don't know anyone there. Everyone likes to have a bit of 'me' time every now and then, don't take it to heart

If you hadn't said "there's no more ME, there's only US", then i would have taken it seriously.

I still agree with you if his colleagues bring their partners. At a work party it's one category or the other, one of them being 'with girlfriends/boyfriends', and if that's the case, you should talk to him about it.
Do you behave embarrassing at parties/ drink a lot?

I’ve always subscribed to the it not the “If you have a partner, then there's no more "ME", there's only "US".” Hence rather pissed off and upset that he seem to be ashamed of me!

Were both 20 so not a silly little teenage couple

To cut a long story short tonight is the boyfriends work xmas party, im not invited but expected to pick him up. I’m rather upset about this as on previous nights out etc he has been asked where I am but still doesn’t think to invite me. I’ve always subscribed to the it not the “If you have a partner, then there's no more "ME", there's only "US".” Hence rather pissed off and upset that he seem to be ashamed of me!

Were both 20 so not a silly little teenage couple and have been together nearly a year. Night out with the lads etc I can understand btw so not a controlling girlfriend. Also this isnt something paid for by the company everyone pays for themselves so it not like partners arent allowed

work party?

read this article, trust me, please read this

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/magazine-11950846

To cut a long story short tonight is the boyfriends work xmas party, im not invited but expected to pick him up. I’m rather upset about this as on previous nights out etc he has been asked where I am but still doesn’t think to invite me. I’ve always subscribed to the it not the “If you have a partner, then there's no more "ME", there's only "US".” Hence rather pissed off and upset that he seem to be ashamed of me!

Were both 20 so not a silly little teenage couple and have been together nearly a year. Night out with the lads etc I can understand btw so not a controlling girlfriend. Also this isnt something paid for by the company everyone pays for themselves so it not like partners arent allowed

im a grown woman

To cut a long story short tonight is the boyfriends work xmas party, im not invited but expected to pick him up. I’m rather upset about this as on previous nights out etc he has been asked where I am but still doesn’t think to invite me. I’ve always subscribed to the it not the “If you have a partner, then there's no more "ME", there's only "US".” Hence rather pissed off and upset that he seem to be ashamed of me!

Were both 20 so not a silly little teenage couple and have been together nearly a year. Night out with the lads etc I can understand btw so not a controlling girlfriend. Also this isnt something paid for by the company everyone pays for themselves so it not like partners arent allowed

To be fair it's his work's Christmas Party and he might not have a lot of female friends at work who he hangs around with much, his circle of work mates might mainly be guys (the guys he goes on the lad's nights out with) and the girls are just aquaintences who he has the odd chat with at work. Just because it's a Christmas Party doesn't mean they'll all be hanging around together, they might split away a bit into their groups of mates and if that happens you might feel a bit like the odd one out not knowing anyone to really talk to. If I was in a situation like that I'd feel a bit uncomfortable so he might just be thinking he doesn't really want to put you in that situation. As well as that by bringing you with him it might feel as though he's distracted from his work mates by you for the night when he should really be celebrating with them. If you're really upset about it though why don't you just ask him?

To be fair your whole view about "lad's nights" implies that any female friend(s) that he has, he can only see under your supervision. Is that not a bit too controlling..?

Think you are being a little unreasonable

You need to understand that the main point of work functions is not to have fun. I find work parties a pain in the arse, but still go because they are important networking opportunities and are useful for developing relationships with colleagues. This is surprisingly important, particularly if you are looking for promotion or something like that. Networking is more difficult if your other half is there because you feel you have to stay with them and involve them in conversations rather than circulate around the room.

It can also be a bit awkward for girlfriends/boyfriends because they won't understand many conversations.

Not in the NHS or emergency services it aint, it a let get pissed a gossip about stuff other people at the table wont have seen. Ive done it since i was 14 lol and hes well aware of that, promotion is on merit like exams not who you have butt kissed at the xmas party. Quick intro to who is who and he knows he can piss off for hours and ill only go looking if i havent seen him for a long while, he seen me do it enough time. Plus 6 out of the ten going have took their partners so id have plenty of people to talk to.

This is all about him not having the guts to ask if i could go, as the lass that asked him said would you like to come and didnt percificatly say oh and bring your lass, where as the other have said yes and ill bring the other half.

Hold my hand, im a grown woman thanks i can talk to other people.

It xmas it not a normal night out, actually im more worried about what he thinks about our relationship than who he could shag on the side.

I don't believe that exams are the only criteria. Surely the way people feel about how well you have done is important? It isn't particularly fair, but people are influenced by the way they feel about you as a person. You are more likely to get a positive performance review if you network. Don't underestimate how important this is.


Or maybe he just wants to have fun with his work mates without having to introduce a new person?
And if it is because he forgot to ask whether you could go in the first place, then surely you can't go anyway?

You are getting stroppy for no reason IMO. I don't understand how you can be OK about him having nights with the lads but not nights with his workmates.