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Am I emotionally cheating on my boyfriend? Is this wrong?

Ok, so I have this guy I talk to online, have done for about 2 years now. We understand each other, he always has time to talk to me when Im depressed and upset. sometimes he wants "cyber sex" including cam stuff (we used to talk to each other, I never showed much though, it was mostly him). I don't do any of that anymore because its wrong as Im in a realtionship. But we do talk about our sex lives to each other, and problems we have (like I was upset about some things my bf does).

I tell this guy more than I tell my boyfriend. My boyfriend is the type that you can't tell emotional things to, because he makes jokes/takes the piss. My boyfriend also gets angry alot, talks abot other girls etc.....I need someone to talk to about it, so I talk to this guy. My boyfriend also hasn't made alot of time for me recently, so I complain to this guy. I know its wrong. This guy says he loves me frequently, and asks whether I would choose him over my bf if he lived closer. I say I can't answer that.

Is what Im doing wrong? would people say I should cut contact
Reply 1
Avatar for Neil_K
Neil_K
15
Original post by Anonymous
Ok, so I have this guy I talk to online, have done for about 2 years now. We understand each other, he always has time to talk to me when Im depressed and upset. sometimes he wants "cyber sex" including cam stuff (we used to talk to each other, I never showed much though, it was mostly him). I don't do any of that anymore because its wrong as Im in a realtionship. But we do talk about our sex lives to each other, and problems we have (like I was upset about some things my bf does).

I tell this guy more than I tell my boyfriend. My boyfriend is the type that you can't tell emotional things to, because he makes jokes/takes the piss. My boyfriend also gets angry alot, talks abot other girls etc.....I need someone to talk to about it, so I talk to this guy. My boyfriend also hasn't made alot of time for me recently, so I complain to this guy. I know its wrong. This guy says he loves me frequently, and asks whether I would choose him over my bf if he lived closer. I say I can't answer that.

Is what Im doing wrong? would people say I should cut contact


I don't buy into this whole concept of 'emotional cheating'. It really is bull****. Who says you're 'not allowed' to talk emotionally and deeply with someone of the same sex just because you are in a relationship with someone? Who says it's 'cheating' if you have a boyfriend yet talk emotionally with another guy?

Seriously, who invented that bull****? Can't people see how stupid it is?

When you have a friend, you can have as many other friends as you want and talk as deeply as you want with all of them without having to worry about 'emotional cheating'. Yet, somewhere along the line somebody invented this crap that if you have a boyfriend or girlfriend, then you're 'not allowed' to talk intimately with a member of the same sex because if you do then it's 'emotional cheating'.

Bottom line: there's no such thing as 'emotional cheating'. It's just bull**** sold to you by society.

Talk to who you want, about whatever you want. It's not 'cheating'.

I don't get why you're in a relationship with a guy who you can't even talk to openly and honestly. He sounds really immature, and you are just as immature for staying with him when you know full well you can't open up to him emotionally.

The other guy fulfills your emotional needs, but you're not sexually attracted to him, otherwise you would leave your boyfriend for him in a heartbeat. Either that or you're too scared to break up with your bf. You only stay with your bf because you're sexually attracted to him, despite the fact he doesn't meet your needs emotionally.

The best relationships are where both your sexual AND emotional needs are being met. If you have one without the other, something will be lacking and you won't be fulfilled in the relationship.
(edited 13 years ago)
no your not cheating, the person closest to you doesnt have to be your partner.
wrong as Im in a realtionship

lol wtf you answered your own question
Reply 4
Avatar for Eloise987
Eloise987
11
Leave your boyfriend and find somebody nice who lives closer to home. How far away does this other guy live? To be honest if it's too far ever to see him, personally I'd distance myself a little, as it's risky to be closest to somebody you don't really know and never will. I know it's tricky but just my perspective :smile:
Meh. I don't class talking to another guy as cheating. You seem to feel guilty about it though, so maybe you do.

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